


Unconditional Love : Part Two

by DavinaCFox



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Childbirth, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Roller Coaster, Eventual Happy Ending, Falling In Love, Family Feels, Family Secrets, Gay Sex, Heartbreak, Hurt/Comfort, Long Lost/Secret Relatives, Love Confessions, Love Triangles, M/M, Mpreg, Oral Sex, Past Relationship(s), Post Mpreg, Sex Toys, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-03
Updated: 2019-02-13
Packaged: 2019-10-21 07:55:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 76,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17638841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DavinaCFox/pseuds/DavinaCFox
Summary: Follows on from the end of Part One. Two years after their son's birth, Ed asks to carry Oswald's much longed for third child, but is turned down due to his psychiatric condition. Lee agrees Oswald can carry the implant instead. Ed and Oz are excited for the future – until a car accident leaves Oswald with minor injuries, but Ed is missing, presumed dead.Oswald mourns deeply for Ed, but more family secrets are about to emerge, as he is shocked to learn a secret from the distant past. Jim Gordon sees Ed's death as a chance to finally show Oswald how much he loves him – and they soon begin a wild, passionate affair that will result in the conception of Oswald's much wanted third child.  Then Ed turns up alive and Jim is forced to make a difficult choice under tragic circumstances that will push his love for Oswald to the limit...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Here is Unconditional Love Part Two! I hope it is enjoyed as much as Part One! :-)  
> As before, there are a few tags and characters left off the list because... spoilers!!!  
> So read on and find out!  
> Also, if you have not read Part One, please read that before this instalment because Pts1 and 2 are best read in that order. Enjoy! Love, Davina :-)

Chapter 1

 

It had been over two years since Oswald had given birth to Eddie, his son by his husband Ed Nygma. By now Hope was almost fifteen, and Oswald's daughter, fathered by Jim Gordon, was a perfect combination of both her dads. Jim's smile. Oswald's hair and pale gaze. Her baby brother looked very much like Ed, with a nose like Oswald and hair a shade between his two fathers. Since Eddie's birth, life had been going very well for the Nygma family - Oswald's efforts to destroy the trade in black market fertility implants had turned him into something of a celebrity in the city, and that only helped to boost his business investments well.

Now the truth was out about Nessa, Ed had a close relationship with his daughter by Tabby Galavan. And Hope and Nessa still went to school together, but these days they didn't fight. These days, they were best friends. And Jim Gordon still turned up when ever he could make the time in his schedule to pick up his daughter for school, and every time he did it, he secretly hoped he would catch that glimpse that made his morning:

_Standing there in a silken robe with his dark hair flat and hanging in his eyes as he sipped his morning coffee, hot mess Oswald... It always made his day. Just to see him raise that cup and blow on it as he lowered his long eyelashes to look downward, or that pause as he looked past the steaming coffee and set his arctic gaze on the car as it pulled up. That lazy, just out of bed voice that said Morning, Jim, as he gave him that alluring little smile of his...._

It had been fifteen years since Oswald had made the mistake of having the black market implant. The pregnancy that followed had almost killed him. Jim had never forgotten he was entirely to blame for being the one who had the drunken one night stand with him while he and Ed were apart. But time had moved on and they all got along well and... Feelings _didn't_ move on, if Jim was honest about it, he had loved Oswald for years. Probably before Hope was born, before that first night they had spent together. He had loved him before he even knew it and then Oswald was with Ed, and it was too late...

But that was Jim's secret. When Ed had been anxious about Oswald's safe, carefully planned birth of their son, Jim had been there to support him and offer all the help he could give. He wanted to help. He also wanted so much more than he dared admit to himself, because some feelings never went away and if he thought about that too long, he would end up a sobbing wreck.

But he didn't think about that as he pulled up on the driveway, instead, he stopped the car and – _jackpot!_ There he was, opening up the front door wrapped in a green silken robe that hugged his curvy body. Oswald had gained a little weight since Eddie's birth, his hips were heavier and there was a cute little roll of fat around his belly. _Curvy Oswald._ This sight alone had made the long drive in heavy traffic worthwhile – apart from doing his fatherly duties and taking Hope to school, of course...

“Morning, Jim,” said Oswald as he raised his coffee cup and sipped from it. His hair hung dark and silky in his eyes, he was leaning against the wall outside the door and fixing him with that pale and pretty gaze, he blinked and his long eyelashes that framed that gaze fluttered as he smiled.

“You're early,” Oswald remarked.

Jim got out of the car, feeling secretly triumphant that his plan to arrive early and spot a certain bird in his silk robe with that _just got out of bed_ look had succeeded. He was smiling as he went up to the entrance of the Van Dahl mansion.

“I didn't realise, I didn't check the time. I thought it was later,” Jim said, stopping right there as he realised he was making way too much fuss over Oswald's remark.

“It's a lovely morning,” Oswald added with a smile.

“It certainly is,” Jim agreed, smiling back at him as he wished Oswald could know that this morning was all the more beautiful for the fact that he was standing there wrapped in silk and looking like the pretty, hot mess he always did...

Just then Ed came to the door. He was up and dressed and groomed and the sunlight caught on a faint shimmer to the fabric of his dark green suit.

“Oswald, Hope's leaving for school soon and I've just given Eddie his breakfast... why don't you go upstairs and put something on!”

Jim looked away to hide a smile. In that moment, he silently guessed that if Oswald had been his husband, he would _never_ be urging him to put anything on at all... Oz and Ed stood there talking, as Oswald said he would have fed Eddie after Hope left, because he had only just got up... and a sudden thought hit Jim that beneath that silken robe, Oswald's body carried the scars from Hope's birth, from that black market implant that had almost killed him. It had taken surgery to save the baby then two more operations to stop the bleeding as Oswald had clung to life... _All my fault_ , Jim thought silently, _because I'm the one who got him pregnant with Hope while he had that time bomb inside him..._ He looked away towards roses that were in bloom as he blinked to stop the sting of bad memories becoming tears. Then he remembered Oz and his husband had moved on from that long ago, and he looked back at them, although the thought remained if he ever laid eyes on Oswald's body again, if he saw those scars, he would weep. Not that he would ever get the chance to see Oswald undressed again – all he had was a memory, their one night together had remained an alcohol fuelled blur that he had _not_ allowed time to fade...

“We have to be there at ten thirty,” Ed was reminding him.

Oswald swept his hair out of his eyes, looking up at Ed as he listened.

“And we will get there on time, stop worrying!” he exclaimed, then he looked to Jim, “It's the big day!”

“What big day?”

Ed and Oz exchanged a glance as they both smiled and Oswald's eyes sparkled.

“Ed's making plans to have the implant! I can't carry a third child because I'm over forty five and of course, because of those complications I had with the black market implant all those years ago. Apparently my body is less resilient to childbirth now. But I don't believe that for one minute!”

“But I'm still carrying this baby for you,” Ed reminded him, “I won't let you go through that a third time, Oz.”

There was a slight trace of envy about his gaze as he gave his reply.

“But I've only physically given birth once, with Eddie, two years ago! Hope's birth was a surgical emergency. Surely that means I could have a second natural delivery!” he complained, “As glad as I am for you to have this baby, I wish it was me carrying it.”

“And I deserve a chance to know what that feels like,”Ed reminded him, leaning and locking with his gaze as Oswald's expression softened.

“I guess you're right, Ed.”

“I wish you both the best of luck today,” Jim added.

“We don't need luck,” Ed said, sounding very sure about it, “There is no reason I would be refused a fertility implant, I'm young enough, I'm in good health, I could easily cope with pregnancy and childbirth!”

Just then Hope came to the door, ready to leave for school.

“Hi Father!” she said brightly to Jim, then as she left the house she glanced back, “Bye, Daddy, bye Uncle Ed. Good luck today!”

“We won't need luck, sweetheart!”Oswald said fondly.

Just then the sound of the rumble of small plastic wheels and the running of little shoes on the polished floor sounded as Eddie dashed to the front door pushing his toy truck to a stop. He looked up.

“Jim!” he said in surprise, “Hi Jim!”

Jim smiled down at the boy who wore blue jeans and a t shirt with a question mark on it.

“Hello Eddie,” he said fondly.

Hope was already in the car.

“I'd better go now, I hope it all goes well today,” Jim added as he gave Ed a pat on the shoulder, and as he was about to leave, Eddie looked up his Daddy and grabbed at his silken robe, tugging it.

“Jim stay!” he said excitedly.

“No, my dear, Jim has to take Hope to school today,” Oswald replied, smiling down at his son.

Jim walked off with a smile on his face. As his son had tugged at his robe, for the briefest moment the fabric had parted and he had caught a glimpse of Oswald's leg, all the way up to his thigh... He took a breath before he got in the car: _School run, then off to work at the GCPD._ _No more thoughts of hot mess Oswald..._

“Ready for school?” he asked.

Hope nodded and smiled as her dark bobbed hair swayed and shone dark as it caught the sun.

“Let's go, then,” said Jim, and he started the engine and drove away.

 

As Eddie pushed his truck back inside the house, went up the hallway and paused to load it with soft fabric ABC blocks, Ed and Oswald went back inside too and Ed closed the door. Oswald looked at him with a bemused expression on his face.

“You sound so confident when you talk about childbirth. You've never done it before, Ed!”

In response to his remark, Ed grabbed Oswald's hand, stroking it up to the knuckles.

“I can take that much of your hand... a babies head can't be much bigger. Of course I can do this! I'll pop that baby out just like you did with our son!”

Oswald's jaw dropped as he pulled his hand away and his face flushed.

“I can assure you childbirth is nothing comparable to ... _fingers or fist_!” he said.

Ed laughed hard.

“I still remain optimistic some day you will let me do that to _you_...” he lowered his voice, leaning closer, “I don't know why you say you think it might be too much for you after giving birth. I mean, its not as if it's as wide as the Gotham tunnel down there. I've never fallen in and had to call Batman to come in and get me out!”

Oswald's face flushed again as he gave his arm a playful slap.

“ _Stop it, Edward, don't be so crude!”_

Then Ed's gaze softened.

“You're so damned cute when you blush like that.”

He leaned closer still, sliding an arm around him, pulling Oswald close as they shared a kiss. Then Ed's eyes shone with delight as he gave Oswald a slap on the ass through the fabric of his robe and something between shock and surprise registered on his face. He always did that, always had that cute look on his face when he got a surprise slap and Ed loved him for it...

“You should get that cute ass upstairs and get dressed,” Ed told him as his eyes sparkled and he was barely able to contain his excitement, “I get my implant today!”

 

A short while later, after leaving Eddie with Tabby for a few hours, they arrived at the hospital. There had been a time when coming to this place flooded Ed's mind with memories of the trauma of Hope's birth and those dark days afterwards when he feared he would lose Oswald. But Eddie's birth had changed all of that – now, he just wanted to experience the birth of their next child, to carry this baby for Oswald, to share everything he had experienced whilst pregnant with Eddie...

For once, Oswald could barely get a word in as they sat and waited for the appointment. Ed was so enthusiastic, so excited.

“And as as soon as I've filled out the paperwork I can have the implant today,” he said as they sat together in the waiting area, “I've been reading up on everything, Oswald – I know the latest implantation techniques are so much faster than they were when you got yours - no need for sedation, anaesthetic gel to numb the pain and the implant gets inserted, implantation scar immediately closes...” he looked at Oswald with a big smile on his face, “We could start trying for this baby today!”

Ed had certainly been reading up on everything. Oswald thought about all the other advances that technology had made possible and wondered if Ed had found out about the other option too...Knowing Ed, his reaction to the next question would certainly be amusing...

“Do you know about the chest injections that can stimulate breast milk production?”

Ed's smile faded as she shifted in his seat.

“No, Oswald – I don't wish to have... female attributes.”

Oswald laughed out loud as several others in the waiting room looked around and Ed felt instantly uncomfortable as he shot a frosty look at the strangers who had stared at them.

“It's not like that, Ed!” Oswald said in a bemused tone, and he lowered his voice, “It just means you can breast feed after the baby is born. You won't have any physical changes to your chest except a very slight swelling that's barely noticeable, and your nipples will get a little bigger and harder. It lasts for the first six weeks post birth then you have to switch the baby to formula milk.”

“Um...no,” Ed said as he shook his head, “I'll just carry your baby and bottle feed. That feels like the best way for me.”

Oswald sat there in silence for a moment as he placed his hands on his cane, leaning on it lightly as he paused for thought.

“I'm just saying, if _I_ was having this next one, _I_ would have breast fed. This technology wasn't around three years ago.”

“I'm not doing that, I don't want to,” Ed replied, and then as he saw the slightly resentful look on Oswald's face, he understood why.

“You really wish you could carry this third one, don't you!”

“But I can't,” Oswald reminded him, “And I'm happy for you to have this experience, I really am,” he briefly squeezed his hand and then let go again, “I'll always wish I could have had this baby. I would have had two or three more babies if I could. I used to dream of us having a large family.”

“I know that,” Ed replied as his voice softened, “Let's just be thankful for what options we do have. And I'm excited about this!”

“So am I,” Oswald agreed with a smile.

Then their appointment arrived. _And that was when everything changed..._

 

As they sat down in the consulting room and Lee Thompkins looked back at them, Ed smiled brightly.

“Well, here I am!” he said.

She smiled back politely and then paused to look through his notes.

“Exactly why did you both make this appointment?” she asked, and as she looked at Oswald, his expression changed to one of confusion.

“For Edward and I.”

“I'm not sure I understand,” Lee's dark hair framed her face as she looked down at Ed's notes again, then she glanced at Oswald's and shook her head.

“Oswald, you know I said it's not a good idea to have a third child. You had complications with Hope -”

“I'm not the one asking for the implant!”

He stared at her and she stared back at him, then she turned her head, looking to Ed as she was briefly lost for words. She hated to turn down anyone who wanted a fertility implant, but she had to think of the welfare of the father as well as the child...

“Oh no, this is difficult...” she gave a sigh, “Ed, I'm so sorry but you can't have an implant.”

His expression changed to one of dismay, then anger began to flicker at the back of his gaze.

“Why not?” he demanded.

She sat back against her chair, glanced down at his notes again and then met his gaze apologetically.

“While the unit has a number of chemicals that assist labour and birth, and they are sealed in the implant, there is a risk that in case of an accident or injury, the implant could leak a small amount of chemicals that could clash with your medication. There's also the risk that the emotional side of it, coping with the pregnancy, could put you at risk. You have a serious psychiatric condition -”

“ _What the hell does THAT have to do with anything?”_ anger flashed in Ed's eyes as Oswald muttered _Oh shit_ , and reached for his hand, grasping it tightly, a silent plea for him not to lose him temper because that really wouldn't help them overcome this problem at all...

Lee paused, then shot him a stern look.

“Ed, this isn't easy for me. I understand you want to have this baby, I know what it means to you and Oswald to have a third child but you have a split personality and most people in Gotham have heard of Riddler! I can't risk your welfare by allowing you to have the implant.”

Anger burned in Ed's gaze.

“You're _discriminating_ against me?”

“No, I'm not,” she said firmly, “I'm protecting your best interests. You're on medication and you handle your condition wonderfully, you're a great father, too! But if there was any reason for you to come off the meds or they clashed with the pregnancy, your personality could split, with that baby inside you and it could be harmful to both of you. That's the reason why I can't allow you to have the implant.”

Ed drew in a slow breath. Behind his glasses, his eyes were filling with tears of resentment and rage. Oswald patted his hand then looked to Lee with a smile.

“ _Okay, time for Plan B.”_

Ed looked at him sharply.

“We have a Plan B?”

“Yes we most certainly do,” Oswald replied with a smile, then he looked to Lee and began to speak:

“I fully understand it's not advisable, not entirely safe to have a second pregnancy over the age of forty-five. _But._.. your reason for saying that is the strain on the body when the implant detaches and the pressure on internal organs before the baby passes through the implantation scar for delivery....” he leaned on his cane, leaning forward as he fixed her with a determined gaze, “Lee, I have only had ONE natural birth. When Hope was born, she had to be cut out of me with a surgical incision to my ribcage because the implant was black market and couldn't trigger labour. So I have only put my body under heavy strain of natural birth ONCE. Also, the injuries to internal organs with my first birth was due to the implant rupturing - and it was incorrectly positioned. That wasn't the case with my son and it won't be the case with the next one. So none of my old injuries would have any strain at all. As for my age, if you want to check my file you will see I recently got checked over and I'm very healthy.”

Lee opened up his file, glanced at it and then looked at him with a weary expression.

“I take it you did that as part of _Plan B_ , should the need arise?”

“Yes!” Oswald confirmed. He already had a sparkle in his eyes as he sensed victory.

Lee looked at his file again.

“Okay,” she said with a sigh, “I'll let you do this _one_ more time Oswald – and this has to be the very last time! I'm only allowing this because you're healthy and your partner can't carry the baby due to his psychiatric condition. This is the very last one!”

Oswald's face lit up with a bright smile as victory shone in his gaze.

“Thank you, Lee!” he said warmly.

 

Two hours later, Ed left the hospital with Oswald, who was not the unsteady wreck he had been before. Last time, he had needed to be sedated for the procedure. This time, anaesthetic gel and a five minute procedure to implant the device had been all that was needed. Before it was implanted, Lee had taken the tiny, silver unit from its protective cover and held it out to them, and asked if they wanted to hold it before it was put into a sterile solution before insertion. Ed had held it carefully, then to Oswald's surprise, he had placed a small kiss on its shiny surface. _“Sending all my love to the place where our baby will grow,”_ he said, and Oswald had felt a wave of emotion as he blinked away tears of joy.

After the procedure, Oswald had spent an hour resting to allow for the numbness to wear off and the implantation scar to close up, then Lee had given him an exam and confirmed he was healed. Then she had scanned him and Ed had held his hand as they saw the tiny implant resting deep inside his body.

“ _There's your new womb,”_ Ed had said softly.

Now Oswald was implanted, he had lost all anger and resentment over not being able to do it for him. His clever Oz had prepared for this possibility, and now they were leaving with the ability to conceive a child – but he would not be carrying it, now Oswald would have that third pregnancy he had longed for. They were both happy with this outcome. And the new implantation method meant the scar was already closed, and they could start trying for their much longed for baby as soon as possible. They left the hospital and got into the car, and Oswald was pleased to see Ed was so happy once more. When Lee had refused him, he had been heartbroken. But that had changed now.

“I'm thrilled!” Ed exclaimed as he started up the car, then he glanced at his husband with a playful look in his eyes.

“Are you still numb?”

Oswald had a shine of victory in his gaze that hadn't left him since Lee had given into his demands and let him have the implant.

“No, Edward, I can confirm everything said about the new implantation method is true. My ass feels fine!”

Ed laughed.

“ _I want to start trying right now, let's get away from the city!”_

They drove out of the parking area.

“Now?” Oswald exclaimed, “Can't you wait till we get home?”

Ed chuckled as he waited for the traffic to clear then took the car on to the road.

“Why wait? The implantation scar is instantly healed, and it's tough, too! We can have some rough, passionate sex... Oh! I have an idea!”

The excitement he saw on his face made Oswald sightly uneasy.

“Not outdoor sex... what if someone saw us, Ed?”

“They won't,”Ed replied as they drove towards the highway, “We'll take the route that leads to the bridge, get out of the city and go for a drive to the woods.”

Oswald got comfortable in his seat as he glanced at him and laughed.

“You want to have me in the woods?”

“Why not? Let's be adventurous!”

Oswald's hand slid down to the place below his ribcage where soon, he imagined a swelling where his child would be – and felt impatient to conceive.

“Alright, Edward. Just this once, we'll have sex in the woods!”

“Yes!” Ed said in delight as he drove on.

“But no messing up my suit,” Oswald warned him, “If we can't find a suitable spot I insist we do it in the car!”

“I'll find us a good spot,” Ed replied, “You can be sure of that!”

And they drove on, heading for the bridge and out of town.

 

As the car took a route down a road shaded by trees, the bridge was behind them in the distance and the sun was shining and they were both in a mood that reflected the brilliance of the day. Ed sped the car up, making the most of the empty road, smiling as he looked at Oswald.

“Let's find somewhere to turn off... this looks like a good spot, we just have to find somewhere away from the road...”

Oswald cast a glance around as Ed slowed the car, taking in the sight of the lake on one side as on the other, trees grew tall with heavy boughs and between their gaps, woodland was visible past a steep drop. There was a barrier that ran along side the drop, and Ed was following it to the end to find a place to turn off the road.

“What a beautiful day,” he smiled and so did Oswald, “The sun is shining,” Ed added playfully, “And my Oz is beautiful... it's a great day to make another baby Nygma!”

“Oh, I've missed having a baby Nygma grow inside me!” Oswald said as he gave him a radiant smile, “I am so happy, Ed! I thought all was lost when you got turned down. I can't believe my idea worked! It's still sinking in, we have the chance for a third baby!”

“More than a chance,” Ed reminded him as the turned the car around the sharp bend in the road, “It won't take long... those implants work fast!”

Then Ed slammed on the brakes as Oswald gave a gasp, wheels screeched on road surface and they came to a sharp stop.

“ _Oh, shit... that was close!”_ Ed looked to a section of road that was crumbling away at the edge and in front of it was a sign that read _ROAD CLOSED_. He exchanged a glance with Oswald, who still looked startled, then Ed drew in a couple of short breaths as he got over the shock of almost taking the car off the road. He looked to the other side, where it was open, and saw a turning up ahead that led past the lake.

“We can cut across, there's no traffic,” he said, and he reversed the car, cut across the lane and drove past the sign, carried on for a short distance, the turning was further up on the other side of the road, and the sun on the water looked calm but brilliant as light reflected on its surface.

“Over there,” Ed said, indicating to a clearing just off the road, “You and me, by the lake...” he flashed a smile, “It's a perfect spot!”

And he sped up the car, making the turn for the lake, and a red blur slammed into the vehicle. As the crash of metal on metal and a shower of shattered glass happened all at once, the impact sent the car into a spin as Ed struggled with the wheel and Oswald grabbed hold of the seat, yelling _Ed_ as the world spun in a blur and the car slammed into a barrier, the impact was bone shaking and as the car rolled, Oswald blacked out. The last thing he heard was the scream of tearing metal.

 

It was dark - dark and wet. For a split second, he was at the dock and Ed had a gun in his hand. As it went off he felt the pain tear through his guts as he fell into the freezing water. _No. That was years ago. Ed loved him. They were married now. And the car had just crashed and there was water..._

Oswald woke with a gasp, seeing the shattered wreck slowly filling with water from the lake. The car was upright now, all the windows were shattered and Ed was slumped at the wheel, blood ran from a gash to his head, and a trickle dripped from inside his ear, it was running down his neck and dropping on to his suit.

“ _ED!”_ he yelled, then he shook him.

Ed gave a groan.

The water was still coming in, it was covering their legs now and almost up to the seats. Oswald felt an ache and looked down in horror at his taut seatbelt, it was cutting in below his ribcage, right over the implant...

“ _No!”_ he gasped, ripping free of the seat belt, then he reached over and did the same for Ed, and shook him again. Ed raised his head. His eyes were blurred as he saw Oswald's panicked expression, yelling about a car and water... Oswald reached in his pocket and grabbed his phone, calling 911.

“ _We're trapped... a lake just outside the city... a car hit us, we're trapped in the vehicle... there's water coming in!”_

Ed heard Oswald breathing hard, then he closed his eyes. Pain throbbed across his vision as Oswald sat there, breathless as his heart hammered and he reached for the door handle and tried it but the weight of the water or the river bank was stopping it from opening. _How much water was coming in?_ He looked down. It was halfway up. He looked through the twisted metal and saw the lake, the water had crept up over the front of the vehicle stopping just short of the wind shield. He turned his head, looking back, seeing a steep bank. They were safe as long as the car didn't sink into the mud...

“ _Ed...”_

His husband gave a groan and remained slumped at the wheel, “I'm going to try and climb over you and get out....”

Ed gave no reply.

Oswald tried to move from his seat, and all he saw was the glare of the sun on the water, and as he felt the chill of the lake as it crept in a little more, he passed out, his head against Ed's shoulder.

As he opened his eyes again, he was resting against the driver's seat. _It was empty._ The drivers side had been smashed and crushed and the door was hanging open on a twisted angle, waving gently back and forth as the water moved it in a ghostly motion.

“ _Ed!”_ He yelled, and ignored the pain in his damaged leg as he scrambled from the car, into waist high cold water as his shoes slipped in mud and he clung to the wreck as he made his way around it. The cold was getting to him, either that, or he still had concussion, but as he reached the back of the car, he was clear of the water and he slipped as he made his way up the steep bank, then he fell to his knees, shaking as his head pounded and he looked about the calm, flat surface of the water:

_No Ed._

_Maybe he had already got out and gone to wait for help._

_But he wouldn't have left him in the car..._

A noise made him look back. The car had just sunk a little deeper into the mud, now the water was filling the interior.

 _And Ed was nowhere to be seen._ He called his name one more time, then he collapsed on the bank, suit covered in mud, soaking wet and cold from the water, as the only sound that came back in reply was the car slowly sinking further into the lake.

 

When the call had come through, it had been from Jim, who sounded tearful. Tabby had grabbed Eddie and put him in the car and drove over to Gotham General, then she had run into the building with Ed's son in her arms and a look of panic on her face as her long ponytail flew behind her and she hurried to find Oswald. She found Jim first, he was standing outside Oswald's room and he looked tearful.

“Any news?” she asked as her eyes filled with concern.

Jim shook his head.

“Oswald's going to be fine. He had concussion, he's been lucky. But there's no sign of Ed yet.”

Tabby's gaze stung with tears as she thought of Nessa and Hope, both at school, but mostly her own daughter Nessa, Ed's child. _The father of her child was missing..._

“But you've got people out there looking for him?”

Jim nodded.

“All we know is a drunk driver was speeding and slammed into them as they took a turn, the driver's side was crushed against the barrier and the force of the collision broke the barrier - it wasn't strong enough, it was old and needed replacing - and the car rolled into the lake. Ed was driving, Tabby. Oswald said he was in the car but after he passed out he doesn't know what happened. I've got people combing the woods and a search of the lake has just started. I'm sorry,” he looked to Eddie and then to Tabby, “But the impact was heavy and the barrier is a real mess, there's blood all over it – Ed's blood. _I think he's dead._ ”

Tabby's voice broke with grief as she held Ed's son closer and thought again of Nessa, who was yet to find out.... _Ed was gone? It seemed unthinkable._

“Does Oswald know yet?”

Jim felt an ache in his chest. This news would destroy him.

“Not yet. He's still recovering, I'm not sure when he will wake. I should go in and see him... Soon as I can, I'll tell him the situation.”

Tabby blinked away tears.

“Tell him I'll take Eddie home with me and pick the girls up from school, tell him not to worry, the kids are okay...”

“I'll do that,” Jim replied, then he opened up the door to the room where Oswald was resting, he had bruise on his brow and he was sleeping deeply. Tabby lingered in the doorway for a moment, then as Eddie said _Daddy_ , she spoke quietly to him.

“Daddy has to rest for a while, he had an accident,” she said, “You're coming with me today, Jim will stay with Daddy,” then she glanced to Jim, who had taken a seat at Oswald's bedside. One look at him told her he was dreading the moment when he would have to break the news.

“I'll call you later,” she said, then she left with Eddie.

Jim sat in silence, waiting for Oswald to wake. As he watched him sleeping, that ache in his heart was growing deeper. His years of experience as a cop had already told him it was unlikely Ed had survived. How could he do this, how could he look into Oswald's eyes and tell him his husband was gone?

“I'm so sorry, Oswald,” he whispered, then he said no more as he stayed by his side, wishing the outcome could be anything but this. _Ed was his life. Oswald would be heartbroken. Losing Ed would destroy him..._

 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

 

As school ended Tabby sat nervously in the car waiting for Nessa and Hope. Eddie was in the kids seat in the back, and he was looking around and interested in everything going on around him, he had no clue what had just happened. His father missing, presumed dead... _And now she had to tell the girls._ Tabby's eyes reflected pain as she waited, then her thoughts turned to Oswald. _How would he cope without Ed? He would wake up with that implant inside him, and all his plans to have another baby with Ed still there, all that hope in his heart – until Jim told him the bad news..._ She blinked away tears. Then she saw the girls walking towards the car. She glanced back at Eddie.

“Just wait there, I won't be a minute,” she said, and he smiled at her, two and half years old and oblivious to the awful truth as she got out of the car and met Hope and Nessa as they headed towards her. They both saw the look on her face and their happy expressions instantly changed.

“Are you okay?” said Hope.

“Mom, what's wrong?” asked Nessa.

Tabby looked from Hope to Nessa, struggling to even start to break the news. Who did she tell first? _Hope, your Uncle Ed is missing, we don't think he's alive..._ or, _Nessa, I'm sorry, there was an accident. Your father died today..._

She took a deep breath and began to speak, her eyes first on her daughter.

“Your Dad was out in the car with Oswald today and there was an accident -”

“ _What?”_ Hope said in panic.

“And Oswald is okay, he's got concussion but he's going to be fine. But we don't know about your Dad, Nessa...”

Nessa had started to cry.

“What do you mean, you _don't know?_ ” Hope demanded as tears and anger rose all at once, reminding her instantly of Oswald, “Where's my Uncle Ed, Tabby?”

“The car was hit by another vehicle – a drunk driver who was killed on impact – and went off the road and into a lake. The driver's side was smashed up and Ed was in the car but when Oswald woke up, he wasn't there any more. There was no sign of him. Oswald had to get out through the water and hold on to the car to reach the bank. He collapsed and passed out again. He's in the hospital now, but he's going to be okay... Hope, your Daddy is fine. We just don't know about Ed, maybe he was confused and wandered off -”

“ _Into the woods to die!”_ Hope wailed, _“Or he drowned in the lake!”_ she gave a sob as tears spilled down her face. Nessa was crying too.

“ _No, my Dad's not dead, he's not, he's not!”_ she wept, as the two girls hugged and cried together.

“Come on, let's get in the car,” Tabby said, leading the girls over to the vehicle.

“I want to see my Daddy!” Hope demanded, “He's going to be so upset! He needs me -”

“No, Jim is with him,” Tabby replied as she opened up the car and ushered the girls inside, “You're both coming home with me, I'm taking care of all of you until Oswald is able to go home. He's going to need Jim's help to cope with the news, I know you want to be there, Hope, but this isn't something you can handle.”

“I'm almost fifteen, I'm not a child!” pale fire rose in her eyes, Oswald's temper.

“I know that,” Tabby said firmly as she started the car and looked back at her, “And as you're so grown up, you will _understand_ your birth Daddy will be grieving and needs time to accept the bad news!”

“But you don't _know_ he's dead!” Hope yelled.

Nessa sniffed and wiped her eyes.

“ _He's not dead, my father can't be dead....”_

“It was very bad accident,” Tabby added as she calmed her tone of voice, “It's very unlikely Ed survived. He was driving, the drivers side was smashed up very badly. We have to get used to this now – he is probably gone. I'm sorry, but we _have_ to face this!”

Hope turned to Nessa as she grabbed her hand.

“I don't believe it either,” she said quietly as they drove away, “I think my Uncle Ed made it. He's still alive...”

 

As Oswald woke up, he recalled the water. Then the crash. Then the empty car seat... He gave a gasp and tried to sit up but as hands on his shoulders gently eased him back down to a soft pillow, he looked up and saw Jim standing there, looking down at him.

“Don't try and move, just rest, Oswald.”

“What happened?” fear reflected in his eyes.

Jim paused, thinking how many times he had given out bad news as a cop to strangers.. _but to have to do this to Oswald?_ It was ripping into his heart just to consider it, but he had offered to help with this case, because it was all he could do to try and find Ed...

“Your car was hit by another vehicle. It hit the barrier and went down a slope into the water. It was partly submerged, the drivers side took the worst of the impact. You have concussion, but you'll be fine.”

“Where's Ed?” he demanded as fear rose, tightening his throat as his heart raced in panic. He reached out, grabbing Jim's hand as he looked at him with wide eyes, _“WHERE IS ED?”_

Jim held on to his shaking hand tightly.

“You said he was in the car after the crash. You were rambling to a paramedic about him bleeding at the wheel.. you said he was suddenly gone. You would have lost consciousness for a short time, more than once. We think Ed either got out of the car and tried to get help or he may have slid into the water...We just don't know. The woods and the lake are being searched but there was blood on the barrier, Ed's blood. He would have taken the impact from the collision. If he's still alive, he's badly hurt and that possibility is not very likely, we don't expect to find him alive.”

Oswald had felt shattered as Jim spelled out the facts:

_No. Not Ed, he couldn't be gone, it wasn't possible..._

“ _No, he's alive!”_ he said in hushed voice as his hand trembled in Jim's grip, then he gave a sob, _“My Edward is alive!”_

Looking into Oswald's wide, desperate eyes, Jim wished with all his heart that Ed would be found alive. But he knew an accident like this rarely had a happy outcome. He leaned closer, keeping a grip on his hand as he brushed a dark lock of hair from Oswald's panicked eyes.

“I want to find him alive as much as you do. But it's not likely, Oswald. You need to prepare yourself for the worst, I'm so sorry.”

Oswald gave a sharp cry as he felt the grief cut deep as a knife, then he kept hold of Jim's hand as he yelled out, it was a cry of absolute anguish as if Ed's loss had cut him in half. And for Jim, seeing him break like that brought tears to his eyes and now he couldn't hold them back.

“What ever happens,” he promised, “I'll be here for you and the kids. That's the best I can do, Oz. I will be here for you.”

Oswald was sobbing and shaking as he grabbed Jim's hand with both his trembling hands, clinging tightly to him as if he was all that was keeping him alive.

“ _I should have drowned with him!”_ he wept.

“The kids need you,” Jim said quietly, “Eddie's just a baby. Hope would be lost without you. Think of the kids, Oz.”

Oswald's face was streaked with tears. As he looked up at Jim he felt hollow with grief.

“Stay with me.”

“I won't leave your side,” Jim promised, and he kept true to his word, holding on to Oswald's shaking hand as he slipped into an exhausted sleep once again.

 

It was a long day for Jim. He spent his time at Oswald's bedside and when his phone rang, he took the calls outside the room. The woods had been searched. _Nothing_. The road had been searched. _Nothing there either._ And then a call came through to say so far there was no sign of a body in the lake – but they had found a green suit jacket and it was still marked with bloodstains. A phone was still in the pocket, along with house keys. It had been found a mile from the crash site – at the edge of the water...

 

Oswald was in the hospital for two days. He spoke to the kids on the phone and reassured them that Ed would be found alive, he had to be alive and they must not give up hoping for a miracle. Jim waited until Oz was well enough to leave, then he returned to the hospital with Ed's jacket and belongings in a sealed bag, after all he had been through, he didn't need to make a trip to the morgue to identify his stuff...

When he arrived, Oswald was out of bed and dressed in a clean suit and ready to leave, while Lee spoke to him quietly. Jim lingered back, not wanting to interrupt, and he couldn't help but overhear what was said:

“I know this is a bad time,” Lee said, “But I scanned you after the crash and that implant is slightly compromised. It's ten percent detached. This means if you used it to carry a child, you could have complications with the birth. These implants are not meant to detach at all until labour.”

Oswald stood there leaning on his cane, his hair was spiked and he looked immaculate in a dark blue suit. Determination burned in his eyes.

“Lee, a ten percent detachment doesn't mean I need the implant removed! And when Ed is found and he gets over the accident, we are having that baby! _And that implant..._ ” his voice trembled, _“It was meant to be for Ed until you turned him down. And before you implanted me with it, he kissed that birthing unit, he said it was my new womb...”_ Oswald's voice became tearful, then he drew in a sharp breath, “I will _not_ have it removed!”

“Just be aware if you used it for a pregnancy, you could have a difficult birth,” she added, “It might detach suddenly without discharging the chemicals that allow for the stretching to deliver easily - and you could end up needing intervention, forceps, having blood loss, stitches... all the complications this kind of device is designed to avoid.”

He looked intently at her.

“Nothing could compare to the pain of Edward going missing!” he said sharply, “Missing, Lee – _not_ dead! And even if he was dead, obviously, I would never marry again. And I would _not_ have that implant removed, it was his! If I have lost him, I fully intend to keep the unit inside me for the rest of my life, until I'm an old man!”

“An _empty_ fertility implant?” Lee said, “Why would you do that, Oswald?”

“In memory of Ed and what we could have had,” he replied tearfully, “Now please respect my wishes, Lee. You are not the one whose loved one is missing. You do _not_ have my uncertainty!”

“I understand that,” she told him quietly, “It's up to you, Oswald.”

As she turned to leave the room, she saw Jim in the doorway, then she saw the bag in his hand and the look in his eyes.

“Just let me know if he needs me,” she said quietly as she passed him on the way out, and Jim nodded. Then he walked into the room to give Oswald the hardest news he had ever had to give to anyone.

“You might want to sit down,” Jim said, feeling caught between his professional role and the need tearing at his heart to grab Oz as soon as the news hit hard, and hold him until his last sob had subsided.

“Why? I'm perfectly capable of standing up!”

Oswald was leaning on his cane with a defiant look in his eyes. He had not noticed the bag in his hand, not yet...

“I have some bad news,” Jim continued, “We found something at the edge of the lake, at quite a distance from the crash site.”

He opened up the bag, taking out Ed's torn and bloodstained jacket.

“Is this Ed's?”

Oswald's eyes widened as a look of utter devastation came to his face. He nodded silently. Jim placed the bag on the bed, the jacket on top of it and then took the keys and phone from the bag.

“And are these his phone and house keys?”

Oswald stared at the items as he shook his head, words failing him as tears ran down his face.

“Are these Ed's, I need to know?”

It was hard to breathe. Oswald drew in a tight breath.

“ _Yes...”_ he whispered.

Suddenly his legs were numb and he let go of his cane as it clattered to the floor and he fell to his knees, reaching for the bloodstained, muddy jacket as he grabbed at the fabric and wept into it.

“Oswald, I'm so sorry.”

He barely heard him as he knelt there, clutching at Ed's jacket and crying softly. All Jim could do was kneel down on the floor beside him, then put an arm around his shoulder.

“ _I WANT ED BACK!”_ Oswald suddenly yelled, and he gave another sob, then as Jim pulled him into his arms, Oswald clung to him, weeping inconsolably.

 

Jim had stayed on the floor with Oswald for an hour. He had wept until his eyes were red and sore and then Jim had reminded him that the sooner he got home, the sooner he could see his kids. They were still at Tabby's. They wanted to come home. But he needed to come to terms with the shock of Ed's death first.

“I'll help you,” Jim reminded him, “The first few days will be difficult. I'll be there for you and the kids.”

“And perhaps by then Ed will have walked through the door and all of this won't mean a thing,” Oswald had replied as they made their way out of the hospital and headed for Jim's car.

“You mustn't hope for too much,” Jim said cautiously, “Oz, I've seen more accidents than I care to recall during my time as a cop. It's very unlikely he's alive.”

They had reached the car. Oswald turned sharply and glared at him.

“I'm only allowing you to get away with _that_ remark because you're my daughter's father!” he said bitterly, “There _IS_ a chance Ed could be alive! No matter how slim that chance, it does exist!”

“I want it to exist too,” Jim promised, “But you know as well as I do that he's not going to walk through the door.”

There was a sad, empty look in Oswald's tearful eyes.

“Just take me home, Jim,” he said quietly.

 

In the weeks that followed, life was tough.

Jim kept the search going. His people found nothing. No trace of a body in the lake, no body in the woods. Now it wasn't a missing persons search, not for a live missing person. There were animals in the woods. The lake had depths that could swallow anything into the mud. _Remains_ was the word used now, or _body_ , when discussing the case of Edward Nygma's disappearance.

And while Jim had not given up the search, Oswald was in deep despair.

He had been the one to break the news to the kids about Ed's jacket being found. Now he had told them, it was likely Ed would not turn up alive. He didn't want to believe it, but he knew Jim was right as much as he hated to admit it to himself. _Ed was gone. The love of his life was no more. He was alone now_ _with a broken heart and the pain of grief and loss and every morning he woke up with that cold, empty space beside him, he would turn over and press his face into Ed's pillow and weep._

He drank most evenings. Hope knew, and she covered up for him. Hope helped take care of Eddie when he was slow to get up because he was hung over and Ed wasn't there to kiss him and say _Good morning beautiful_ and bring him coffee.

Tabby tried to help, offering to take the kids for the evening sometimes. _But why? So he could sit alone and mourn for Ed as the house went painfully silent and the ache in his heart cut deeper?_ Jim had come over to the house several times but Oswald had kept his distance. In the weeks after the crash, the press had made matters worse by calling and asking for interviews. Now his success and reputation as a hero for changing the law regarding fertility implants had become something of a curse. The press had even been there when he had returned to the crash site to lay flowers for Ed. He wanted this time alone, but the city had such sympathy for him, flowers flooded in and filled every room with messages of condolence. _But flowers didn't bring Ed back._

 

_Three months passed._

Jim had changed his working schedule so he could take Hope to school for three days out of five every week. Tabby often had Hope come over for sleepovers with Nessa, and she took care of Eddie when ever she could, just to make life easier for Oswald. But nothing made life easier. It just seemed to get harder by the day. He had thought in the past that pain meant Fish Mooney smashing his leg and leaving him a cripple, or that quarrel that had seen Ed shoot him and leave him for dead. So much had happened in the old days, during their life of crime that had seemed tortuously harsh.

_But it wasn't. Not compared to this. Nothing that had ever happened in his life could have prepared him for the shock of Ed's death. And he was dead. He knew it now. He wasn't coming home again. And that implant was still there, waiting for Ed's baby. As long as it was there, it was a source of comfort. His new womb. That implant Ed had kissed. That love would always be inside him, even though the unit was empty..._

Some nights, when the hour grew late, after numbing his pain with a few drinks, Oswald would look at pictures on his phone, him and Ed in happier times. Or he would think back to the past and recall all the times they had shared, every hug, kiss, conversation, every orgasm. Then he would lie there in the dark with his hand on his cock, recalling the feel of Ed's touch, his kisses, the way he sucked him, the way he parted his legs and took him like he owned his whole body. Then he would give himself a few short, brutal jerks and come quickly, comforted only for the seconds the climax lasted before pain of loss and guilt consumed him for taking this pleasure alone, when Ed was out there buried under mud and water, or scattered, partially eaten by woodland animals. Those kind of thoughts gave him bad dreams:

Sinking into water, down to the bottom, raking at the mud as Ed's rotting hand thrust up and closed over his wrist, as his face emerged from the muddy water glaring at him as if to say, _How dare you survive and leave me to die here, Oswald?_ Those bad dreams were the worst. He would wake sobbing, saying _I'm sorry, Ed!_

Hope had heard him wake from his nightmares. One evening she had sat with him in the front room while Eddie was asleep and talked to him about it.

“There was nothing you could have done,” she reminded him, “You were hurt too, Daddy. You got out of the car and made it to the bank, then you passed out,” and her eyes filled with tears, “I'm _so_ glad you got out of that car!” she sobbed, “Or you would have died with Uncle Ed!”

Then they had hugged and cried together. He had never been so glad of Hope's strength and support. She reminded him in so many ways of her father. She was so like Jim, who was often in his thoughts.

Almost four months after the crash, Jim offered to come over and visit while the kids were at Tabby's. He said it would be a good chance to talk. He had offered countless times before, and Oswald had always refused. But this time he agreed, purely to share his thoughts on how difficult life was without his Edward.

 

Jim had felt apprehensive as he got out of the car and went up to the front door of the mansion. It was crazy to feel nervous - this wasn't a date. But every time he saw Oswald, his feelings remained unchanged. Love like that didn't evaporate and time and all that had happened since did nothing to change it. _And Oswald didn't need to know that, especially not at time like this..._

As the doorbell rang, Oswald was feeling equally nervous. He paused by the mirror, briefly inspecting his appearance. His hair was styled and spiked, he looked sober because he had stayed off the booze for two whole days without as much as a single measure to steady his shattered nerves. His suit was immaculate, costly black fabric with black roses worked into the material, a matching waistcoat and and a black tie. He was always in black now – he was in mourning for Edward. That mourning could never stop, he was decided now, it would have to last for as long as Edward was lost to him, and that would mean a lifetime.

He opened the front door.

“Good evening, Jim,” he said, and his eyes reflected that same sorrow that had been present since the crash, Jim noticed it right away. He didn't want Oswald to be sad. He wanted to kiss him and keep on kissing him until every last trace of his heartbreak was mended and every last tear was dried forever. But Oswald was too wrapped in sadness to even consider such a thing.

“How are you?” Jim asked as he went inside and Oswald closed the door behind him, “You're never around when I call for Hope, you're always busy - that's what Hope says.”

“It's been a difficult time,” Oswald replied as he limped through to the front room and took a seat on a comfortable chair next to the fireplace where flames flickered low, “Do have a drink if you want one,” he gestured to a bottle on the table, “I'm laying off the booze for a while. I expect you've heard.”

He glanced away as Jim looked at him.

“Heard what?”

Oswald looked into the fire as the flames reflected in his pale gaze.

“I'm fully aware Tabby would have mentioned I've been drinking more lately. Only in the evenings, when Eddie's gone off to bed,” he glanced at Jim, “I'm never drunk when the kids are up. I wouldn't let them see me like that.”

“And what if they need you in the night, what if Eddie called for you or -”

“Hope helps me all the time,” Oswald replied, “We manage, Jim. I'm fine.”

He knew he had stated that a little too firmly, and he caught a hint of doubt in Jim's eyes, but then changed the subject.

“I've been thinking perhaps it's time to hold a memorial service for Ed...” he looked down at the wedding band on his finger as he thoughtfully twisted it, “But it's only been a few months. I know in my heart he's gone but there's still this doubt that nags at me... If there's no body, then perhaps -”

“No, Oswald,” Jim said gently, “There's a lot of reasons why his body may not be found.”

“And I do not wish to think about any of them.”

Oswald's gaze shifted to the picture on the wall and Jim looked at it too, and it made his heart ache sharply: Oz and Ed on their wedding day. Hope was in Oswald's arms and Oswald was still in a wheelchair, recovering from the damage caused by that black market implant. It had been fifteen years and still Jim's heart longed for the past as he remembered the night of Hope's conception... He turned his gaze back to Oswald, who looked back at him with a questioning expression.

“What is it, Jim?”

He got up from his seat.

“I think it's time I had that drink you offered,” he replied, grabbing a glass and taking the bottle from the table, pouring a small measure. He took a sip before sitting down again, then he looked across the space that divided them – no less that the width of the fireplace were the chairs were set. They were so close, yet so far apart. Oswald blinked a few times, fighting back emotion. His thoughts were on Ed again.

“I find it hard to look forward any more,” he admitted, “I get up every day and the kids are here and I'm thankful for my children, so thankful! But then I remember Ed's never coming home and I know I will never see any joy in life again, not in the way I used to. It was supposed to be forever. _What do I do now forever means nothing?_ ”

Oswald was openly tearful now. He wanted Jim to hold him but felt sure he would hate himself for the luxury of that embrace. Ed would have hated him for it, jealous and possessive Ed who would have killed another man for as much as looking at him lustfully...

“This may not be a good time to bring this up,” Jim began, hoping he had not made a huge mistake to mention what had just come to mind, “But what's happening about the implant?”

Oswald looked at him sharply, feeling a jolt as he stared at Jim, a surge of anxious, protective energy firing up inside him as he thought of that brand new womb, that empty, precious place that would never expand with Ed's child inside of it...

“I'm keeping it,” as he said that, his hand slid beneath his open jacket, resting over the fabric of his waistcoat, just below his ribcage where he wished he could feel a bump, but even though he felt nothing, he knew it was there, and in its own way, it was an instant source of comfort.

Jim felt awkward. He looked down at the floor as the firelight bounced off its polished surface where it met with the rug.

“Sorry...I didn't mean to offend you, Oz.”

“I'm not offended.”

Jim met his gaze again.

“Can I ask why you're keeping it? I mean, do you still want another child?”

“I wanted Ed's child,” Oswald replied, “And now that will never happen. But this implant is all that's left of the last of our great plans together. It's only right I should keep it.”

There was such finality about that statement, such resignation to a life alone with all dreams gone. Jim nodded and said no more about it. The fire crackled warmly and then Oswald broke the silence, forcing a smile to hide behind as he buried his pain.

“I suppose I should be happy with the blessings in life I still have – you and I have a beautiful daughter, Jim. And Edward didn't leave me with no reminder of him. I have little Eddie. And of course Tabby has Nessa, Ed's oldest child. I can't believe I spent so many years thinking Nessa was mine!” he shook his head, “But finding out she was Ed's child is such a precious gift to me, even more so, now that he's gone...” Oswald's smile briefly faded as his own words had pained his heart at mention of Ed's death, then his mood lightened again, “At least now I know she's Ed's, he has left two children behind. And I have the peace of mind that comes with knowing I have no other children out there I'm yet to find out about! I have two kids, and Nessa will always be precious to me. Two reminders of Edward - and you and I have our beautiful daughter, Jim...” he paused, feeling caught out as his face briefly flushed. _Jim didn't need to know how deeply he loved him, how much he cherished the memory of their night together so long ago.... life had moved on, Ed had been his life. Nothing could ever be the same again._

“Yes, I'm proud of Hope too,” Jim said warmly, “And I'm immensely proud of her birth daddy, who gave up a criminal empire to raise my daughter.”

“ _I couldn't have done it without Ed.”_

As he had said that, Oswald's heart had filled with pride that sounded in his voice. Jim took another sip of his drink to hide the sting of his words.

“I was there too. I still am!” he smiled. Oswald smiled back at him.

“And I am thankful,” he assured him, “Who would have thought life would have turned out like this?” then he gave a sad sigh, “I will always miss him, Jim. There can never be another like my Ed.”

“Of course not. There was only one Edward Nygma.”

“Two, if you count Riddler,” Oswald laughed softly, “I loved them both – I mean, both sides of him. All of him.”

 _As I love you entirely,_ Jim thought silently, and he tried not to think how he missed seeing Oswald in the mornings, that hot mess on the doorstep drinking his coffee. Now Oswald was mourning for Ed, all hint of his flirtatious manner had gone, replaced by sadness in his eyes and constant talk of his late husband.

Jim stayed for two more hours. He hugged Oswald before he left. He wanted to kiss his cheek but held back, avoiding his gaze as he said goodnight. His heart still ached for all he had missed out on long ago, and he felt as if he was waiting for something that would never happen.

Oswald felt the same as he closed the door and walked back along the silent hallway, missing Ed's laughter and the way he used to surprise him with a sudden kiss or a squeeze on the ass. He missed his embrace more than anything, the closeness of him, the reassurance that their lives would always be together. He suddenly thought of one of Ed's riddles:

_Worthless to one, but priceless to two?_

_Yes, worthless to one. Painful to one without the other..._

 

Oswald went up to the bedroom and took a bottle with him, but left it aside along with an empty glass, determined not to slip into the hard to break habit of drinking alone at night. He called Tabby, and she told him Eddie was fast asleep and she would bring him back in the morning. Hope was still up and she asked if he had a nice evening with her father, and he smiled as he said how great it was to spend some time with Jim, his old friend.

When the call ended he sat on his bed, resting in the middle of it between his space and the place Ed used to lay as he opened up his laptop and accessed his social media account. He lingered for a while on old pictures of him and Ed, and his eyes stung with tears as he saw that first picture taken after Eddie's birth: He was in bed, still flushed and sweating with his hair damp and looking exhausted from labour as he held Eddie in his arms and he and Ed smiled for the camera. In that moment, he wanted to climb into that picture and stay there forever, a moment in time frozen, just to be with Ed again. The pain in his heart cut deep. He switched to another album, smiling as he saw Jim standing with his arm around him, a Christmas tree in the background. His heart felt warm again... _Jim...A crazy thought had just hit him. Use that implant, have another baby with Jim. Start life again, be happy...Just think what it would be like..._

“No,” he said quietly, “No, I couldn't do that to you, Edward.”

Then as he glanced at his notifications, he saw he had a new message – and it wasn't from anyone on his friends list. He accessed it, and as he saw the picture of sender his eyes widened in surprise. It had been years, many years...

“What the hell do _you_ want?” he murmured, as a thousand images flashed through his mind:

_He recalled being physically pushed on to his bed so hard his whole body had bounced as old springs in the mattress creaked and groaned._

“ _Slow down!”_ he had exclaimed, _“A man of my experience requires gentle handling!”_

“ _A man like you needs a few lessons!”_ she had replied, and as she bit down on the side of his neck and sucked, his eyes had widened.

“ _No, no – Ed might see that!”_

“ _Ed doesn't want you anyway!”_ she told him as amusement danced in her eyes, then she had kissed him again and he had… _Surrendered? Given in? Got swept away by her enthusiasm? It had been the start of a brief but passionate affair. Certainly an experience he would never forget..._

He could still recall seeing Ed the next day, he had laughed as he pointed to the bruise on his neck.

“ _Did you do that yourself, Oswald?”_ he teased.

“ _I don't know what you're talking about!”_ he had insisted.

Ed had chucked.

“ _Did you do that to try and make me jealous? I bet you used the attachment on the vacuum cleaner, ha ha!”_

That had been back in the days before Ed had listened to his heart and come to realised where he truly belonged. This had been so long ago... To this day, whenever he heard the phrase _appearances can be deceptive,_ he thought of her...

She wasn't someone he would want to become involved with again, their brief affair had been passionate but she had dumped him so harshly, he had been the last one to know. And what he had heard said about him afterwards had made him want to cry... He wouldn't want her now anyway, not after all these years and the wonderful life he had shared with Ed. He couldn't imagine anyone ever replacing him, _but_... Jim Gordon briefly flashed to mind and he pushed that thought away. _If there could be anyone else, it would be Jim. In his secret dreams, in moments when guilt over loving another didn't consume him... These thoughts of Jim were becoming more frequent these days..._

Now he was looking at a face from the distant past. This was from a time in his life before he and Ed had become lovers, at least three years or more before Hope's birth. This was a face from way back...

Her message was brief:

 _Hi Penguin_ , that surprised him, these days he was Oswald Nygma, no one called him Penguin any more... except Victor, who ran the Lounge for him. _Boss_ and _Penguin_ had just stuck with him, but no one else called him that – until now... he read on:

_I know it's been a long time. It's been years. And I'm sorry about what happened back then. I guess I should have at least called you to explain. I honestly didn't mean to be so cruel... But enough about the past, I hear you're doing well for yourself these days. Running legitimate businesses. I run my own company – and proud to say it's worth a very healthy six figure sum. Anyway, enough about my success - I need to get in touch with you. Face to face is better but I live far from Gotham, I have for many years. I need you to call me tomorrow, we can do a video chat. There's something I need to discuss and it's important. By the way, I heard about Ed. I'm truly sorry for your loss..._

Oswald finished reading and took a deep breath. He had never expected to hear from _her_ again. What the hell did _she_ want after almost two decades?

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter needs a small warning - there is a brief mention of the loss of a baby. I felt I should put that warning in, but as you see when you read, it's not as it seems :-)

Chapter 3

 

Next morning, Oswald was up early. He surprised Hope by being up first and making breakfast, he fed Eddie and then put the TV on for him so he could sit in the front room on his favourite spot on the rug and drink his juice while he watched cartoons. Eddie looked up at his fathers wedding photo, pointing to Ed.

“Where's Father?” he said, and pointed to the picture of his dads on their wedding day.

Oswald looked down at his son sadly.

“Father is gone...” he said sadly, struggling to find the right words... _What would Mother have said?_ Then he knew what to say, “We had an accident in the car. Your Father went to heaven, he's with the angels now.”

Eddie looked confused as he processed the words, then he smiled.

“When can he come back?”

Oswald blinked away tears.

“He can't do that, Eddie.”

The little boy slammed down his juice and started to wail. Oswald got down on the carpet as his bad knee ached sharply and hugged his son.

“Hush now, Eddie... it will all be okay. I miss your father too. But we are still a family, Daddy will make everything okay.” He hugged him tightly as he wondered how he could keep that promise. _How could anything ever be okay again?_

 

A short while later, Jim turned up to take Hope to school. Oswald was waiting outside the front door, but today he was in a suit and ready to go out. He gave Jim a smile and said good morning. Jim smiled back at him very brightly as he gave him a wave, and for the first time since losing Ed, Oswald smiled brightly too. Seeing Jim had just lifted his mood, unexpectedly.

Then Hope went off to school and Oswald still felt that bright mood lifting his sad heart as he put Eddie in the car seat and strapped him in, then he got into the front and started the engine. A brief moment of sadness flickered in his mind as he looked to the empty passenger seat beside him. They used to take Ed's car everywhere, Oswald rarely drove because Ed liked to drive all the time. But he had to get used to these things now. It was strange how he was adapting so quickly to something that had seemed impossible to handle that was now becoming the new kind of normal.

He drove into the city and parked the car behind the Iceberg Lounge, then he took Eddie by the hand, leading him up to the back way in as he smiled and said, “You're going to see Daddy's club today!”

They went inside, down a corridor, then Oswald opened up the door that led to the main bar. Then he looked down at his son.

“No running about. You can find a place to sit while I talk to Uncle Victor.”

Eddie smiled and then ran off towards comfortable padded seating area where there was a table.

“No running!” he reminded him as his son scrambled on to the seat.

Victor came out of the office with a stack of paperwork.

“You want to go through the profits this month, Boss? It's been good, I think you'll be happy.”

“I'm not sure I recall exactly what _happy_ ought to feel like,” Oswald remarked as he limped over to the table and took a seat and Victor joined him as he set down the paperwork. On the other side of the table, Eddie was looking bored. Victor grabbed a notepad, turned the page and slid it over to Eddie, then gave him a pencil.

“You can draw some pictures while we work,” he said with a smile.

“Thank you,” Eddie replied as he grabbed the pencil and started to scribble.

Oswald smiled warmly at Victor.

“You're great with Eddie.”

Victor paused for thought and pushed the paperwork aside.

“Penguin, I'd like to ask you something... it may not be the right time, and if it isn't the right time, I apologise...” he paused, holding Oswald in his gaze.

“What is this about, Victor?” Oswald asked.

Victor looked thoughtfully at his boss.

“I was thinking, with your tragic loss of Ed, _if_ this has left you with a problem regarding the fertility unit, maybe there is a way you could still go on with you and Ed's plans.”

Oswald shook his head.

“I'm confused.”

Victor cut to the chase.

“I know it's right for some people but it's not for everyone. I guess it depends how you feel about doing that now you've lost Ed - but have you considered a sperm donor to father your child?”

Oswald blinked, then stared at Victor.

“No, I...I wanted Ed's child.”

“But you've kept the implant and you could still have that third baby? I know you probably wouldn't want a stranger to... _contribute_ to your requirements. That's why, if you feel it could be useful to take this approach, I'd be happy to be your donor.”

 _Victor was offering to give him a child?_ Oswald smiled, then emotion shone in his gaze as he looked across the table at him.

“That is a _very_ kind gesture,” he said, “And I thank you for it, and I appreciate it very much. But a good friend is no substitute for the love of my life, Victor. This implant was intended for Ed's child. I struggle to imagine anyone else impregnating that unit – and not by sperm donation.”

“Okay,” Victor replied, “I just thought I'd mention it, in case you ever wanted to consider the idea. Now, shall we get back to checking the finances?”

“An excellent idea,” Oswald replied, saying no more about his offer. It had been a very kind and generous gesture to make, but it was not an offer he felt he could accept. _Jim came to mind again. Jim, because he loved him._ Then he pushed that thought away and got on with business.

 

Later that day when he returned home, Hope and Nessa were in the kitchen as Eddie joined them at the table.

“I made some food for the kids,” Tabby said as she stepped out of the kitchen to join him.

“That was thoughtful, thank you,” Oswald said, smiling warmly.

In the kitchen, Nessa nudged Hope and they looked at each other.

“I think my Mom's going to ask him,” Nessa whispered.

Hope smiled.

“I want him to say yes!”

“So do I!” Nessa replied.

Then Oswald and Tabby walked away, and the girls could hear no more.

“What did you want to say to me that can't be said in font of the kids?” Oswald asked as they reached the dining room and went inside.

Tabby looked rather emotional as she closed the door behind them, then she went over to the fireplace and looked up at the picture on the wall, a picture of Oswald's mother. She hesitated for a moment, then as he joined her, she turned around and met his gaze.

“I was thinking about a few things I could do to help,” she said, “Maybe...me and the kids could move in here, so we could be closer as a family?”

She looked so hopeful. Oswald smiled warmly. Now she looked rather emotional and he knew how much she had changed since Nessa's birth, how the deeds of the past had been healed and how close they had all become... but he knew this was something that was best avoided, her suggestion was kind, but was not a great solution.

“Tabby, the kids are settled as they are. It wouldn't be fair to Nessa to make her move out of her family home and live here permanently. She had her life with you as it has always been – and especially now Ed is no longer with us, she would miss him more living here, with so many reminders of him about the place.”

“Yes, I guess you're right,” Tabby said, then she paused for thought and as she looked into his eyes, there was a deep softness about her gaze.

“I know you and Ed wanted a third child. I realise that won't happen now and I can only imagine that pain. Oswald...” she gently closed her hand over his arm, “Why not do it another way? You could still have a third child. I could have a baby for you. Another precious life.”

She smiled and she looked so hopeful as he reached for her, grasping her gently in a warm hug, but then he let go again.

“Oh Tabby,” he said as emotion took over and he blinked away tears, “That is a truly beautiful offer. But you see, I want to be the one to carry the baby. If I had another child I would want to use this implant I have inside me – Ed's implant. I had another offer today! Victor said he would be my sperm donor. I had to explain, I would want a child by the one I love, I feel there could be no substitute for Ed. But you and Victor have helped me more than you realise. You've both made me see just how loved I am by those closest to me. Thank you for your offer. It does mean a lot, my dear.”

As he leaned on his cane, he reached out with his free hand, giving her hand a squeeze.

“It truly does mean a lot,” he said again.

She smiled.

“The offer still stands if you change your mind.”

 _Victor had said that too._ Oswald brushed a tear from his eye.

“I am fortunate to have such good, caring people around me. I am truly blessed,” he replied, “It gives me hope that perhaps some day, I may find one I cherish as much as Edward... but who could ever take his place?”

She looked at him with sympathy.

“I understand. People can't be replaced.”

He hugged her again.

“I will never forget this kind gesture,” he promised, smiling as he looked into her eyes, knowing she had wanted this so much. He had seen her look up at his mother's picture. She had been thinking about the past, and thinking of the future. A way to repay him for what had happened. But that was laid to rest now, and Tabby's offer had been beautiful and from her heart, but if he had a another child, he would carry it, in that precious implant. _Again, Jim crossed his mind._ He pushed the thought away again, but this time, it made him smile, even if only for the briefest moment.

When they returned to the kitchen, the girls looked at them both hopefully. Tabby smiled, hiding her disappointment.

“No, sorry Nessa - we are not moving in. Oswald wants to keep things as they are – and he's right to choose to do that,” she added, casting him an understanding glance.

Oswald smiled back at her and then looked to the table, where Nessa had just finished eating and Hope was helping to feed Eddie, who was making quite a mess. The thought ran through his mind that he loved his family, even though Ed was gone, his family were still together. He was thankful for that. They were still strong and bonded by deepest love.

 

Later that evening, when Hope was off to bed and Eddie had been settled in his room and fast asleep for hours, Oswald closed his bedroom door and then took the laptop over to a small table by the window. He took off his jacket and draped it over the back of the chair, then he looked at his watch. He had told the woman from his past - who he had come to think of as a ghost from the past back to haunt him – that he would speak to her tonight, and it was almost time to make that call. He smiled as he thought of what had happened back then, but only because he recalled the happier times. The rest, he really didn't care to think about at this moment, because it had been too painful...

He made the call, leaving the bottle and the glass aside. He was sure he wouldn't need a drink after speaking to her, what could the past possibly have to say that would have much relevance now? Maybe she had a business proposition. Or maybe she was feeling guilty over what happened years ago, she had heard about Ed and she just wanted to make sure he was okay... He really couldn't imagine it being about anything else at all...

The call was answered and there she was on the screen, smiling warmly. She had tiny lines at the corners of her eyes, but she had aged well, she still looked pretty. Her hair fell soft to her shoulders and as she looked at him through the screen she spoke first:  
“Hi Penguin, you're looking well!”

“Thank you,” he replied, “It hasn't been easy since Ed died, but I'm starting to get my life back together. So, why did you need to speak to me after all these years? And can you call me Oswald – I'm not Penguin any more. I stopped being him when I gave up my empire to have a family.”

“Okay Peng- I mean, _Oswald_ ,” she replied as she laughed softly, “I know it's been years....” then her smile faded, “ _I need to tell you something. It's about the reason I left Gotham.”_

Oswald sat back comfortably in his seat stretching out his damaged leg as it ached stiffly as it always did at the end of the day.

“I remember you vanished,” he replied, “And you didn't say goodbye.”

“I didn't tell anyone.”

“Why not?” he asked.

She paused, taking a deep breath.

“I need to explain something. Don't interrupt me, just listen, okay? I just need you to listen.”

A smile flickered about his lips as he silently recalled a reason why they never would have worked out – she was a fiery and independent person, which was a great quality – but she also had to be in control of every aspect of her life, that had never changed and he had not been the only one to realise that all those years before. She had got through a steady stream of boyfriends back then, all of whom struggled with her fierce nature. She was even doing it now, ordering him to be silent during her call...

“Okay, I'm listening, purely because I am intrigued,” he replied.

Then he saw the look in her eyes change. There was something deep and emotional there, as if she was recalling a heavy pain.

“Oswald, I went off the radar, I disappeared, as you know. _I left because I was pregnant._ ”

His eyes registered surprise.

“You had a boyfriend at the time – didn't you tell him anything?”

She gave a sigh as she shook her head.

“The baby wasn't his. _The baby was yours_.”

Oswald was glad he was sitting down. Her words had just hit him like a speeding train.

“ _Mine?”_

Suddenly he needed that drink. He reached for the bottle and poured a large measure, then sipped it and set it down in front of him, and as he looked back at her, anger flickered in his eyes.

“ _You had my child and didn't tell me?”_

She saw the accusation in his cold arctic glare and her eyes reflected apology.

“You need to let me finish. We had a baby. _Had_.”

The past tense in that statement suddenly registered and his anger melted away.

“Oh no, you... you lost the child?”

Sadness filled her eyes as she recalled a painful memory, to speak of this now was to revisit a place she never wanted to go again.

“I gave birth to a baby boy. He was perfect, Oswald...” her voice had softened suddenly reminding him of their more tender moments that had been shared years before, “He had your face and my hair...a beautiful, perfect little boy. And he was quiet when he was born. He never cried. He never took a breath. _He was stillborn_.”

As pain reflected in her eyes, Oswald stared at her, feeling an ache in his own heart.

“Oh my dear, I am so sorry! You should have told me! You should never have taken on that loss alone, the responsibility for that child belonged to both of us!”

She looked at him intently through the screen.

“I said, let me _finish_ , Oswald. _This isn't the end_.”

He fell silent, looking at her in confusion.

“So I was holding my perfect, but cold little boy in my arms and then I thought, I can't let this happen. I have to try something....” and she started to smile, “I called Hugo Strange. I told him what had happened and he came over and he took my cold, silent little boy from my arms and he brought him back for me. My baby cried and he was warm and heathy and there was nothing wrong with him. Hugo was so kind. He didn't ask questions. He didn't even ask who the father was. He was just glad to help. So much for him being known as a monster maker. _He brought our son back, Oswald._ ”

On hearing those words, his eyes filled with tears of joy. All trace of anger had gone now, she had chosen to bring this boy up alone – away from the city, away from the trouble of the bad old days. Back then, as Penguin, he had enemies. It made sense she had left to raise him away from danger.

“You took him away to keep him safe.”

“And because I wanted to keep him away from criminal activities. I didn't know your life would turn out the way it did. I just assumed you'd always be Penguin, with your criminal empire and that was no place for a child.”

“I understand,” Oswald said as he started to smile.

She smiled too, and any old resentments and past pain that had gone between them melted away.

“He's grown up now,” she added, “He had his eighteenth birthday a few months back and I told him all about you but I said, don't get in touch with your father yet, because he's just lost Ed... But I thought maybe now might be a better time. He really wants to meet you.”

Oswald had felt that news settle into his heart easily. Even the pain of Ed's loss was easier to bear now he had heard this happy news: _He had a son!_

“Tell me about him,” he said, “Is he like me?”

She smiled as her eyes shone with fondness.

“He's very sensitive and understanding. That side of _you_ I saw on more than one occasion.”

Oswald looked away for a moment, not wanting to recall such intimate moments like the night he had cried in her arms. He looked back at the screen as pride shone in his eyes.

“What's his name?”

“Christian Cobblepot. I gave him your last name. I never had any intention of hiding the truth when he grew up. He's very impressed that you used to run the underworld.”

“Oh dear!” Oswald said as he chuckled, “We'd better not encourage _those_ ideas!”

“And he's even more impressed that you campaigned to outlaw black market implants. He knows his father is a hero. He wants to come to Gotham and stay for a while. That would be up to you, of course. I told him he can contact you – not now, you need time to let the news sink in... I was thinking maybe he could get in touch at the weekend? Is that okay for you?”

“Yes! That would be wonderful!” he said.

“He will probably message you online,” she replied, “I'd like to give him your phone number too?”

“Of course,” he agreed, “I'm looking forward to hearing from him!” then he hesitated. He had learned enough for one day and he was glad to know about his son, but to ask for more seemed a little impolite. But he asked anyway.

“I would very much like to see pictures of my son. Would that be too much trouble, or could you send me some tonight?”

“I'd be happy to do that,” she said, then she smiled, “Give me ten minutes after I end this call and I'll send you some photos, I'll send them to your inbox.”

“Thank you so much!” he said warmly, “When Christian comes to stay, will you be with him?”

“I really think you two should just get to know each other,” she replied, “Chris has had a hard time lately, a friend of his died. The funeral was yesterday. I think you would be great help to him at this time, he needs his father, and you've both experienced loss and I just think you two need time alone to bond.”

“That's a wonderful idea,” he agreed.

They ended the call soon after, then Oswald waited for the pictures to arrive. She kept her word. She sent him many pictures, his son as a tiny baby, then at around the same age as Eddie, then pictures from school years. In every picture, Oswald instantly saw the resemblance. This boy was certainly his son. He had the Cobblepot features, even the nose. The resemblance at two and a half to his own son was amazing. Then he saw pictures of Christian as he was now, a grown man – his son whose childhood he had missed. He had light brown hair and pale eyes the same shade as his own. But he was smiling in his pictures, he was fooling around with friends, he clearly had a happy life – and had grown up in a very luxurious house. The final picture showed him posing proudly next to a shiny black Porsche. He stood there in faded blue jeans and a designer t shirt smiling with the car keys in his hand.

“I disapprove of one so young having such a powerful car,” Oswald muttered, “I shall have to talk to you about that, son...” then he started to smile as he looked at the picture again: _His son. His grown up son who he had never known about until today..._ He glanced to the photo of Ed that stood in a silver frame next to the bed.

“Edward, I have a son!” he exclaimed, “His name is Christian! I'm going to meet him! Oh, how I wish you could be here to meet him too!” and he blinked back tears, but for once, they were tears of joy, not sorrow. Life had given him an unexpected surprise that had lifted out the worst of his pain.

Finally, it seemed after those dark days following Ed's loss, things were looking brighter. _He was already a father of three._ If he had another baby, he would have _four_ kids! He kept that thought in mind as he went to sleep that night, and even dared to dream about Jim's baby growing inside that empty implant...

 _Maybe. Perhaps it could happen._ Life still had the power to surprise him, and that gave him hope that there could be a possibility of daring to try and be happy again... _And if he did dare to try, he would try with Jim Gordon..._

 

It felt like a long wait until the weekend. But Oswald woke up the next morning with a smile on his face. He got up early then got Eddie up and dressed and took him downstairs for breakfast. Hope shot him a look of surprise when she wandered into the kitchen ready for school and ready to grab some breakfast before she left, to see her Daddy already busy with her baby brother. He had been so busy he hadn't got dressed yet, he was in a red silk robe, his hair was hanging limp in his eyes but he didn't care as he lifted him up into his arms and smiled brightly.

“Wow, Daddy, you're so... _happy_ today!” Hope exclaimed.

“Daddy has some special news!” he said to his young son, then he looked to Hope as joy shone in his gaze.

“I was contacted by an ex girlfriend from way back. She told me some rather wonderful news, Hope! I have a son I never knew about, he's eighteen years old and he wants to meet me! He's going to contact me at the weekend. He will be coming to stay with us!”

Hope stared back at him.

“I have a grown up brother?”

“Yes!”

“What's his name, what does he look like?”

Oswald set his son down on the floor, and Eddie immediately ran off to find his toy truck. He grabbed his phone from the table, accessed the pictures and handed it to her.

“His name is Christian.”

“Oh wow, he's definitely family!” she said as she smiled, “He's got the Cobblepot looks!”

“Yes he has!” Oswald agreed proudly.

“So who is she, his Mom, I mean?”

Oswald had just reached for his coffee but drew his hand back, fearful of spilling it.

“Someone I knew way back. We were not together very long. It was complicated. Those times were complicated too, it was back in the days when I was still a criminal. She was very lovely, very kind, and could also be very ferocious. A little too fiery for my liking! But we had a few special memories. _Hope, please don't mention this to Nessa_.”

She looked at him in confusion.

“Why not?”

“Because I don't want anyone else knowing just yet. It might get back to Tabby. Or Barbara...” he briefly looked worried, then shrugged it off, “It's just that back then, we had a secret love affair and while that's over and the flame will never reignite, as we didn't make any formal announcement back then, it wouldn't do any good to drag up the past now.”

Hope smiled as she eyed him with playful suspicion.

“Was she married, Daddy?”

“She wasn't single,” he said quickly, and blushed, “Well, she was when we.... got closer. Now take your fourteen year old mind away from such thoughts, young lady! I'm not the type of man to have an affair, I'm a gentleman.”

“Who made me and Eddie a big brother!” she said excitedly, “I can't wait to meet him!”

“I'm excited too!” Oswald exclaimed.

Then he checked the time and grabbed his coffee.

“Hurry up and finish breakfast, Hope – Jim will be here soon!” And he hurried out to the front door, opened it up and stood there with his morning coffee, waiting for Jim to turn up.

 

When Jim pulled up in the driveway and got out of the car, he couldn't believe his eyes: There he was, standing there outside leaning against the wall, sipping his coffee wrapped in a silken robe. Jim's face lit up in a big smile and he almost broke into a jog as he crossed the driveway to meet him.

“Morning Jim!” Oswald said brightly, and he smiled and fluttered those long eyelashes. His sparkle was back. _Something_ had happened. Jim felt a flicker of worry that maybe romance had come back into his life and he wasn't a part of it... Oswald looked so good! _Please don't say you're dating someone_ , he silently prayed, then he spoke up, asking the big question that he couldn't hold back.

“You look great, Oz! What's happened to make you smile again?”

Oswald blew on his coffee, looking downward as the steam rose and Jim's knees went temporarily weak. As Oswald met his gaze, excitement filled his eyes.

“An ex girlfriend of mine -”

 _Girlfriend_? _Oswald hadn't dated a woman for many years.._. it still made his heart lurch as he hid his feelings, smiling and nodding and listening, as Oswald continued, “She got in touch with me to let me know we have an eighteen year old son! He wants to meet me, he may be coming to stay for a while...But my ex won't be joining us. We were over years ago, we're on good terms but there's no chance of us ever reigniting those feelings, it was far too long ago, another lifetime!”

“That's great news!” said Jim, and he smiled brightly, as he felt thankful Oswald had not realised he was overjoyed most of all about the fact that this woman posed no threat to his secret hopes and dreams. _She was an ex and staying an ex. Wonderful news..._

“So you have a grown up son? I can't wait to meet him!”

Oswald placed his hand over Jim's arm and his touch as he gave it a squeeze burned so sweetly to Jim as it hit him that Oswald was grasping him lightly, leaning closer, looking into his eyes.

“I feel as if sunlight has returned to my life, as if I suddenly see new possibilities, light where there was darkness! I feel happy again, Jim!”

All Jim could do was smile. Then as Oswald let go and he missed his touch instantly, Jim silently gathered every shred of his courage together and drew in a breath and forced out the words he had held back for years...at least, _some_ of the words. The words that might lead to other words, if luck was on his side.

“I was wondering if I could come over tonight? We could have a few drinks?”

“That would be wonderful!” Oswald said with a smile, and Jim felt his heart skip a beat as he dared not hope for too much too soon.

“That's a date! I mean, that's settled, see you tonight!”

Oswald laughed and so did Jim, then Hope hurried out of the house to catch her ride to school and Jim walked over to the car. As Hope got in, he looked back at Oswald, who smiled back at him, then Jim joined his daughter in the car and they drove away. Oswald stood there for a moment longer, watching as the car left, then he heard the rumble of little plastic wheels as his son pushed his toy truck up the hallway.

“Daddy!” he called, and Oswald smiled.

“I'm right here, son,” he called back, and he went inside and closed the door, then he paused for a moment, thinking about Ed. Love for him was still there in his heart. But the love for Jim had never gone away. And if he needed proof that he could find the courage to let a bit more light into his life, all he needed to do was think of his children to remind him he had to do that. Hope. Little Eddie. And Christian, his grown up son he was yet to meet. Life had given him a precious gift in return for his loss, and maybe there were more gifts to come. He just had to be brave enough to seek them out. The name _Jim_ was still echoing through his mind and bouncing around in his heart as he went back up the hallway to help Eddie pile his ABC blocks on to his favourite toy truck.

 

Much later that afternoon, when Hope was met from school by Tabby, who told her she would be sleeping over with Nessa because Oswald had said he was spending the evening with a friend, she smiled as she saw the two girls exchange a glance.

“Is it my father?” Hope said.

Tabby smiled too and nodded.

“He sounded very happy too,” she added, “I've noticed Jim and your Daddy have been very close lately. That can only be a good thing.”

Nessa was hit by a sudden thought as the girls got in the car.

“Oh. My. God!” she exclaimed, “What if your Daddy and your Father get back together, Hope?”

Tabby had got in the drivers seat and started the car. She glanced back at them.

“Nessa, don't put ideas in her head. They're probably just spending time together.”

As the car pulled away, Hope looked at Nessa and smiled.

“I hope they do get together,” she said, “I can't imagine my Daddy being with anyone else after Uncle Ed, no one - except my Father. I think they would be very happy together.”

As she drove along the road, on hearing that remark in the back of the car, Tabby smiled too: _Oswald and Jim? Yes, that was what everyone who knew them had been hoping for, after losing Ed, no one could replace him, but Jim would certainly be very happy with Oswald. Those two would have a great life together, and they deserved to be happy..._

 

As evening came around and shadows fell and dusk settled over the Van Dahl estate, Oswald had put on a black suit and he stopped as he turned to his black tie, thinking of that light that had come into his life, choosing a silver and grey tie instead.

“I still love you, Edward,” he said aloud as he stood alone before the mirror in his bedroom, “But I must live a little... for the kids. And perhaps in a small way, for myself...” he ran his hand over his spiked up hair then put on some cologne, “No one can ever replace you, my love. But I must carry on with life. It's the hardest thing I've ever done, but the alternative is to give up entirely...” He turned away from the mirror and went over to the bedside table, where he picked up Ed's framed picture.

“I will always love you, that will never change,” he said softly, then he put the picture back and left the room, checking the time. Jim would be arriving soon. And if he was honest about it, he felt more than a little excited to be in his company again. Life had changed suddenly, as if a door had been kicked open letting in light and with it all possibilities. He felt mildly nervous, and knew why. Yes, he still felt the same and he knew Jim did, too. He had always seen it in his eyes. Perhaps tonight, they would get a little closer. He was ready now, ready for all possibilities...

 

Jim turned up ten minutes later. He parked the car, got out and smiled as he saw the porch light come on and Oswald open up the door. He was standing there leaning on his cane with a smile on his face. His gaze wandered, just for a moment, over Jim's blue jeans and the way his shirt was partly unbuttoned beneath his jacket. Then Jim went inside and Oswald closed the door, shutting out the late September breeze that was turning cold at night.

“Good evening, old friend,” Oswald said as he smiled warmly.

“Hi Oswald,” Jim said fondly, “You look great tonight... there's something different about you.”

“It's the tie,” he replied as he leaned on his cane and they made their way down the hallway together.

“No, I meant, you look so much happier, it's good to see.”

“Thank you for the compliment, Jim.”

Oswald led him through to the front room, where they sat together on a sofa as the firelight flickered. Jim had brought a bottle of wine over and he set it down on the table. Oswald had already placed a bottle of scotch there with two glasses beside it. Jim knew his first choice would be the harder stuff, he felt slightly nervous as Oswald talked about his good news and his son and how excited he was to be speaking to him at the weekend.

Jim poured the drinks. They relaxed by the firelight, Oswald talked more about his amazement at finding out he had a son. Jim had tried to imagine how he would feel if he had suddenly learned he had child out there, long since grown up.

“Don't you feel bitter that you missed out on his childhood?” he asked as he cradled his glass in his hand.

“Not at all,” Oswald replied with wide eyed honesty, “I am just thankful to know he exists. I can't wait to meet him!”

“Who is his mother?”

Oswald dismissed the question with a wave of his hand.

“Someone from the dim and distant past,” he replied, “But it was good to hear from her, I fully understand why she chose to take our son away from my life of crime as it was back then. It would not have been the best environment for a child.”

“She was from Gotham?”

“Yes, and she moved away when our son was born. So Jim, tell me, do I really seem a lot happier now?”

Oswald had just changed the subject and Jim knew it, but he didn't push for more details. Instead he smiled as he shifted a little closer.

“You look more than happy. You look beautiful when you smile like that.”

Oswald's smile faltered as he felt his tension rising.

“Oh Jim, I don't deserve such flattery!”

“Yes you do,” Jim promised as their gaze locked, “Tell me something, Oswald – you always call me your old friend. But I'm also the father of your daughter. Does that make me anything else to you?”

Oswald had relaxed a little as Jim leaned in and the feel of his breath on his face, carrying a trace of whiskey and the scent he could only name as _Jim_ , was arousing as he leaned in a little too, wanting to kiss him but holding back.

“If you get any closer I might kiss you,” Oswald said, and the shyness of his tone and the way his face flushed made Jim's heart race.

“Then I guess I should do something about that,” he said, and he wrapped his arms around him, pulling him closer.

Oswald's eyes closed as his mouth opened, welcoming Jim's kiss as he raked his fingers through his hair and gave a low whine that spelled out just how much he needed this. And in the middle of that moment, the thought suddenly hit him: 

_Ed had been gone for a few months and here he was, on the sofa, getting hard while that implant made his ass wet as a horny pussy as he longed for penetration, as he french kissed Jim Gordon..._

“ _No!”_ Oswald pulled back sharply, looking apologetically at Jim, “I'm sorry, I can't do this... it's too soon.”

Jim gave a heavy sigh and nodded.

“Right... I should be going soon anyway, it's getting late -”

“You don't have to go!”

“No, I really should,” Jim replied, and he got up and headed for the door as Oswald grabbed his cane and limped after him.

“ _Jim, wait!”_

Jim had reached the front door. He turned back as Oswald hurried towards him. There was a look in his eyes that said all the unspoken words Jim longed to hear, he could see it burning there in his gaze.

“I'm sorry,” Oswald said, sounding a little out of breath as he shifted the weight on his damaged leg as it ached from the dash to door, “I...I didn't mean _stop_ when I said that, I just meant I needed a pause to reflect...”

Jim's gaze softened as he stepped closer, placing his hand on Oswald's cheek as he looked into his eyes.

“ _What am I to you?”_ he asked him again.

Oswald's eyes widened as he sought the answer in his heart and spoke from it at once.

“ _You're my...Jim.”_

Jim smiled as love shone in his gaze.

“That's good enough, Oswald,” he murmured, and then he took him in his arms and pulled him close and kissed him with passion that took his breath away. As he pulled back allowing Oswald to breathe, love and desire shone in his eyes.

“I'm staying tonight,”Jim promised, “This is long overdue for both of us...”

Oswald could give no reply as he closed his eyes and welcomed another kiss. Thoughts of Ed slipped away as his heart raced and his head swam as Jim kissed him. It felt so right, and tonight, he was feeling brave enough to do this. Jim took him by the hand, leading him towards the stairs. Oswald let him take the lead as he thought of the bedroom he had shared with Ed for the whole of their marriage and silently hoped he wouldn't have another awful moment of hesitation, because _that_ would wreck everything...

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

 

Oswald was shaking as Jim led him into the bedroom. They went over to the bed and Oswald sat down, casting his cane aside with a clatter as his gaze fell on Ed's picture next to the bed. Jim reached for the frame.

“Want to turn it downward, if it makes you feel awkward?”

“No,” Oswald said, “Put it on the dresser for me.”

Jim removed the picture and placed it on the dresser, at a distance from the bed so the image of Ed would not make Oswald feel awkward. He waited for him to look at it again, but as he joined him and stood over him as he sat there, looking up at him, Oswald's gaze was entirely on Jim now.

“It's been years!” Oswald exclaimed as he looked up at him, his face was flushed and his eyes were darkening with desire as they held a sparkle of something else that could only have come from his heart.

“Oh Jim, I've always … I mean, I never stopped....” he hesitated, stuck for words.

Jim understood, this was tough, losing Ed and then facing up to other feelings he had long buried. He helped him out, exercising patience as he loosened Oswald's tie and slipped it off, then he took off his jacket and his waist coat, then started on the buttons on his shirt as his breathing got harder and his efforts were slowed by Oswald reaching for him, kissing him with impatience.

“ _I want you!”_ he gasped.

“And you've got me, Oz,” Jim said softly, grabbing his legs and raising them to the bed.

Then he unbuckled his belt and stripped off the rest of his clothing, leaving him naked and hard on the bed as he stood over him, looking into his eyes as he stripped off his own clothing and Oswald's hand moved down to his cock and he stroked it lightly as he lay there on his back, watching him undress.

As Jim tugged on his zip and freed his erection, his eyes were locked with his lover, then as he took off the last of his clothing, Jim's gaze suddenly slipped to the scars on Oswald's body – not the old bullet wounds. There was a huge scar that ran around one side of his ribcage, two other scars ran deep, branching off from it, the legacy of the ruptured implant fifteen years before when Oswald had almost lost his life giving birth to Hope. Jim joined him on the bed, laying beside him as tears filled his eyes and his fingertips traced lightly over the scars that marked his pale flesh.

“ _Oz, I'm so sorry, these scars are my fault!”_

Oswald gave a gasp, stunned by his words and the kisses that were rained down on his flesh as he felt Jim's tears wet on his skin. Oswald reached up, sliding his fingers through Jim's hair.

“But I survived, and we have our daughter!” he said softly, “Please Jim, don't cry for me, never cry for me again!”

Jim turned on his side, putting his arm around Oswald as he looked into his eyes. Now was not a time to hold back. There were no more hesitant moments, no delays, nothing hidden.

“ _I love you Oswald,”_ he whispered, “I always have and I always will. I'm going to show you how happy you can be, I'm not Ed, but I can give you a different kind of love – _mine!_ Please say you'll give me that chance, just give me a chance, please let me -”

“ _Yes, yes I will!”_ Oswald said breathlessly as he grabbed at his shoulders, pulling him close and silencing his words with a hungry kiss. The last of Jim's tears spilled as they shared that moment, then Jim pulled back, taking a breath and smiling down at Oswald, who looked up at him with those pretty eyes wide and his face flushed.

“It's going to be different with me,” Jim added, “I can't replace Edward. But I will give you new thrills, new experiences, I'll make you come every single day of your life and I'll always love you and remind you that your are loved!”

Oswald breathed heavily, his eyes misting with tears.

“I'm yours, Jim!” as he said those words it felt as if the chains in his heart had just broken, allowing it to beat again in a way it had not been able to since Ed's death.

Jim shifted position, placing a kiss in the deepest part of his scarring, then knelt between his legs as Oswald spread them wider, his cock was solid and Jim wanted to take him in his mouth, but he didn't want this to be over too fast. It was their first night together, and he wanted it to be wonderful, for Oswald to look back on this in years to come and recall every moment of the night _his Jim_ made him come alive in a way he had never felt before.

“Tell me what you want me to do to you,” he murmured as he looked down at him.

Oswald's hair was messed up, he was perspiring, he looked a hot mess and he was everything Jim had dreamed he would be, and to do this sober, with nothing to blur the memory, felt like perfection for both of them.

“ _Everything!”_ It was all Oswald could think to say.

Jim smiled as he gently spread his legs wider.

“ _Everything_ sounds good to me,” he replied softly.

As he reached for him, Oswald felt Jim take the lead, he was weak with desire and didn't dare to touch his hardness again for fear of losing control. It had been fifteen years since he and Jim had last made love, fifteen years of that memory sitting at the back of his mind and now he was here, in his bed. Jim placed his hands under his thighs, pushing his legs up as he took a good look at him. Oswald's breathing got harder and faster.

“What are you doing?”

“looking at you, Oz,” he said softly, taking in the sight of his hard cock, his balls hanging heavy and below that, his ass, looking so inviting. He saw the wetness there and his own erection ached unbearably.

“ _Oh wow, that implant makes you so wet...I bet it tastes good, too...”_

He was down on him fast, lapping at his entrance and tasting the silky lubricant as the implant answered to his arousal, making Oswald give a low whine of helpless need for more as Jim sucked gently at his ass, then slipped his tongue inside. He kissed him there, then he paused to spread his legs a little wider, laying one leg slightly bent at the knee, then carefully using both hands to shift his damaged leg.

“What are you doing?” Oswald said as he breathed hard.

“Getting you comfortable,” Jim replied, and he smiled at the sight of Oswald on his back, legs open, looking up at him in complete surrender.

“ _You're beautiful,”_ Jim stated, then he pushed two fingers inside him, drew them almost out and added a third, up to the knuckles as Oswald gave a gasp and he thrust against him. The feel of Jim stretching him was absolute bliss. The lubricant was running from him like crazy, over Jim's fingers, making a wet patch on the bed.

“You open up so well,” Jim said, kneeling there as he parted his own legs wider and tried to ignore the ache in his cock , “Oh Oswald, I love your ass... I can tell you've given birth!”

Oswald raised his head, for a moment there was a look of dismay on his face.

“ _Excuse me, Jim?”_

Jim couldn't help but laugh. Seeing him look so indignant at such a moment was comical, and he loved him all the more for it.

“I mean, I love your ass,” he replied, “It's beautiful, it's... _accommodating!_ ”

“Okay... that sounds much better!” Oswald's head hit the pillow heavily as he felt Jim push deep and he gave another moan. As he withdrew his fingers, Oswald felt their loss at once.

“ _No no, give me more!”_

Jim's face was flushed now and the ache in his cock could wait no longer.

He was on top of him, raising his legs to his hips as he entered him with a firm thrust. The gasp he made and the way his eyes had closed as he took the impact of that was something Jim wished he could keep forever, as he thrust against him slowly and carefully, then kissed him tenderly.

“ _I won't come inside you... the implant... we don't want an accident. I'll bring condoms next time, I promise.”_  
 _“You can if you want to...”_

Oswald looked up at him, and Jim met his gaze as he looked down, and then he thrust hard, just to see his pretty face register the hit deep inside his body.

“ _You're so fucking beautiful!”_ he whispered, thrusting harder and stealing his breath with another kiss.

Oswald wrapped an arm around him, pulling him closer as he breathed hard against his shoulder.

“ _Oh Jim, don't stop, don't stop...”_

His other hand was down on his cock, jerking it brutally with impatience and as he gave a sharp cry and come spurted out and hit Jim's belly and ran down Oswald's hand, Jim felt the first of the throbs deep in his ass as his orgasm was spent, and he withdrew fast, two sharp jerks to his own cock sent a shower of wet, white heat between Oswald's open legs, covering his balls and thighs. Jim got up on his knees, breathing hard. The sight below him was something he would never forget, Oswald on his back, legs wide open, spattered with the sticky mess of both their orgasms as he lay there recovering his breath.

“That was so good!” Oswald said breathlessly.

Reaching for Jim's embrace felt like the most natural thing to do after such good sex, as he rested in his arms, closing his eyes as Jim placed a kiss in his hair that brought a smile to his lips. Oswald slept deeply that night in Jim's arms, and for the first time since losing Ed, nothing felt out of place. To be with Jim just felt right, and for Jim, fifteen year's wait was over. At last, Oswald was in his arms.

 

“ _You are so pretty...”_

Those were the first words Oswald heard as he woke to early morning sunshine and Jim's kiss on his cheek. He smiled as he opened his eyes and turned on his back. Jim was beside him, looking down at him as he lay on his side, their bodies close and warm beneath the sheets. The Oswald gave a sigh.

“What time is it?”

“Five thirty.”

“I have to get up. Eddie slept right through last night, he's going to be up soon.”

As Oswald reluctantly left Jim's arms and gave him a kiss, Jim grabbed a silken robe from beneath Oswald's pillow and handed it to him.

“Thank you, Jim,” said Oswald, and despite how early it was Jim sat up, appreciating the sight of him in that robe with his hair hanging in his eyes. Hot mess Oswald. _His_ hot mess now...

“I'd better grab a quick shower,” Oswald added, then he limped off to the bathroom.

Jim decided to get up too. He thought about how stiff Oswald's leg was in the mornings, and how fussy he was about cleanliness, and then he began to strip the bed of the stained sheets. He found replacements in a linen cupboard and by the time Oswald was out of the shower, the bed was made, the sheets were fresh and Oswald smiled at the sight of it.

“Thank you, Jim! You're so thoughtful!”

Jim blushed.

“You'd better go and wake your son. I'll grab a shower and join you downstairs.”

 

By the time Jim joined him in the kitchen, Oswald was dishing up scrambled eggs for his young son.

“Hello Jim!” he said looking up at him with a smile on his face.

“Hello to you too, Eddie!” Jim said fondly.

Then he sat there with a coffee, watching as Oswald fed his son. He felt a warm glow spreading through his heart as he thought what a great parent Oswald was, and then he thought about the remark he had made last night, about not needing to be careful about the implant...

“ _Do you want another baby?”_

He had waited until Eddie had been fed and had been settled in front of the TV to watch his early morning cartoons, and as Oswald stood in the kitchen washing the dishes, wrapped in that silky robe with his hair still messy, now had seemed like the best time to ask. Oswald set the last of the dishes aside and dried his hands, then turned around and met his gaze.

“I have given it a great deal of thought since the accident,” he replied, “It has often crossed my mind that if I ever used the implant now Ed is gone, I could only consider you... to father my child, _if_ you wanted to... it was just a thought....” Oswald was blushing as he looked downward, avoiding his gaze.

“You thought about this before last night?”

He nodded.

Jim started to smile.

“You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear you say that,” he said softly.

Oswald looked up at him sharply, a slightly guilty look in his eyes as he realised he had been caught out, revealing those hopes and dreams he had kept hidden. Jim went over to him and hugged him tightly, then he kept his arms around him as he gave his reply.

“If that's what you want, that's what you can have, Oz. Anything for you, I just want to make you happy. And I'd love another baby too. I want to be there for everything this time!”

Oswald started to smile as sheer joy sparkled in his eyes.

“You have no idea how much this means to me!”

“Yes, I do,” Jim said as love shone in his gaze, then he checked his watch.

“I have to go home, get changed and go to work, and I'll see you tonight...” he pulled him close, “Our new life starts now, honey!” he kissed him tenderly and then let go, “See you later on,” he added, giving him a wink.

Oswald could only smile and blush as Jim walked out of the kitchen and headed for the door. It really did feel like a brand new start. He and Jim were working out just fine, Jim even wanted another baby – and he had no doubt in his mind that their plans would work, it felt as if this was the start of something that had waited patiently for many years to come to pass. In the blink of an eye, life had become wonderful again. _And it was just sinking in that he was going to have another baby, that implant wouldn't be an empty shell for much longer..._ Joy shone in his eyes as he slid his hand below his ribcage and he thought of Jim.

“ _I'm so very happy!”_ he whispered as he blinked away tears of absolute joy.

 

It wasn't a secret for long.

That night when Jim returned, he brought Oswald flowers and kissed his cheek. In front of the kids. Then he hugged him and told him he loved him. Oswald could only stand there smiling as joy shone in his eyes as Nessa and Hope, who had been spending time together in the front room sharing a homework project, exchanged a glance and then Hope had a big smile on her face as she asked:

“Are you back together?”

“Yes we are!” Oswald said joyfully.

Later, when Tabby turned up to drive Nessa home, as soon as she got in the car, Nessa had told her the news:

“Uncle Oswald is back with Hope's Father!”

Tabby started up the car and drove away as she started to smile.

“That,” she said, “Is wonderful! So they should be. Those two belong together.”

 

“I've waited for years for you, Oswald,” Jim said softly that night as they lay together in bed in the darkness of the bedroom, the only light offered came in through the window as the moon shone silver across the sheets and he looked into Oswald's eyes.

“I never stopped loving you,” Oswald admitted, “Even though I was happy with Ed, I had moment as when I thought of you, and I remembered us. I see you every time I look into our daughter's eyes, when she smiles I think of you.”

Jim held him closer and kissed him tenderly.

“I am truly sorry for what happened to Ed. But it all changes now, Oz. It's you and me and our future now. It won't be the same as when you were married but I can make us happy.”

Oswald hesitated, then spoke cautiously.

“I could always marry again.”

“No,” Jim said softy, “Ed Nygma was your husband. I'll always honour that, I want you to stay Oswald Nygma. I'd rather just be _your Jim_ ,” he smiled, “We have to do things differently, I'm not replacing Ed, I'm just making _us_ happen the way that's right for us. You and me, being happy, having a baby together, raising the kids together. It's going to be great.”

“Its going to be wonderful!” Oswald added as his eyes sparkled.

Jim felt a warm wave of love wash through his heart as he lay there with Oswald in his arms.

“You really want that next baby soon?”

“More than anything.”

“Okay,” he whispered, giving him a squeeze, “We will have another baby, that's our next goal. I'll make all your dreams come true, Oz.”

That night Oswald slept warm in Jim's arms. The ache in his heart for Ed's loss would always be there, but now it felt bearable, settled into its place. He had never wanted to learn to live with a pain like that, but it had happened and then Jim had come along and everything felt right in the world again. It would never be the same, it was different now – but different in a way that made him smile, made him want to carry on living and look forward to the future.

 

Next morning the alarm sounded early, and Oswald woke to a soft kiss on the back of his neck, then another on his shoulder.

“My pretty Oswald,” Jim whispered in his ear as he pulled him closer, sliding a hand over his hip and straight between his legs, gently caressing him to hardness.

Oswald didn't get a chance to turn around as Jim felt that wetness caused by the implant answering to his arousal, and he thrust into him gently, moving slowly, holding on to him as he whispered to him.

“ _Let's make that baby right now, honey. You and me and our second baby... I can't wait to see you pregnant, Oz, you'll look so damned beautiful and curvy!”_ His hand slid to the place below his ribcage and he stroked at it as he thrust against him harder and Oswald gasped.

“ _Jim....”_ he said breathlessly, _“Don't stop...oh god, that's perfect!”_

Oswald's hand had moved down to his cock as he started to jerk himself slowly, then faster, as Jim moved harder against him.

“ _You're all mine now... I can't wait to see you pregnant with my kid! I want the whole world to know, I'll be the proudest man alive, me and my hot mess, knocked up Oswald...”_

Jim gave a gasp, and as he felt Oswald shiver as he came hard, his own orgasm throbbed deep inside him as he thrust in roughly, making Oswald cry out and he held him there firmly until every last throb had faded out and they lay together panting. Then he separated from him and Oswald turned over with an amused expression on his face.

“You want everyone to know you _knocked me up?_ Not exactly poetic, Jim!”

He chuckled as he toyed with a strand of Oswald's hair made messy by sleep.

“I'm just that kind of guy, Oz,” he said with a smile, “Not poetic, but passionate as hell!” then he kissed him deeply.

 

That morning, Jim left for work. Oswald got up early and got dressed and then woke Eddie and took him downstairs for breakfast, then he put Eddie in the car as Hope hurried over after a frantic search for homework she had misplaced, and he drove her to school. On the way home, he talked to Eddie, who happily babbled away in the back as he watched the world go by and Oswald told him that some day soon, he would have a baby brother or sister. Then they returned home, and he settled his son in front of the TV, then he sat on the sofa, put his cane aside, took off his shoes, paused to rub his aching ankle, and then he opened his laptop and accessed his social media account to see a message from Jim with smiley faces and heart emojis.

 _Wanna tell everyone, or shall I change my status first?_ Jim had asked.

Oswald chuckled as he sent a reply:

_I'll go first, get back to work Detective Gordon!_

Then he smiled as he did something that he knew would get a lot of likes and comments. He changed his relationship status:

_In a relationship with James Gordon._

He posted it, and as the notification began a fast count upwards, he laughed. He couldn't keep up with the amount of comments and likes, it was almost instant... He closed down the screen. Then a video call came through. He accessed it. The call was from Christian E Cobblepot. _His son was calling him?_ He felt a mix of joy and tension. _They had never spoken before... It wasn't even the weekend yet!_ He answered the call.

“Hello, son,” he said.

The young man on the screen looked exactly like his pictures, he was sitting in a bedroom with pale walls and resting against cushions as he sat there on his bed looking into the screen with eyes the same shade as his own. His slender, athletic build was hidden by a baggy sweatshirt. He looked nervously into the camera and smiled.

“Hi Dad!”

Oswald smiled brightly.

“I wasn't expecting to hear from you so soon, this is wonderful! I was so happy when your mother told me about you!”

“I was thrilled when she told me all about you,” he replied, “You used to run the underworld?”

Oswald laughed.

“That is ancient history.”

“And you campaigned to stop black market fertility implants. You saved a lot of lives, that's amazing, Dad!”

Oswald looked downward as he smiled, not wanting to take too much praise.

“Christian E Cobblepot?” he asked, looking into the camera again, What's the E for?”

“Elijah. My Mom gave me your Dad's name as my middle name.”

“That was a lovely thing to do,” he said fondly, “I must thank her for that.”

Christian paused for thought.

“So, you've had two kids by implant?”

Oswald smiled again.

“Soon to be three. I'm trying for a baby with my new partner Jim – he's my daughter Hope's dad, we got back together recently.”

“That's good news,” Christian said, then he hesitated again, “What's it like, having a baby?”

Oswald laughed

“A lot of hard work! I've got your young brother watching TV in here and he won't be quiet for long!”

“No...I meant, what's it like to have a baby? I heard it's really painful, even more painful than female childbirth?” As he spoke, he nervously pulled the fabric of his sweat shirt away from his body, as worry reflected in his eyes.

For Oswald, it was pure instinct. Like the time Eddie had been running around in the garden and he got a sudden feeling he was about to have an accident and he found him climbing up the rockery and ran to grab him before he slipped. _Something was wrong..._

“Chris, do you know someone who's pregnant?”

“No,” he briefly looked away.

“Your Mom said you went to a funeral the other day. A friend of yours died?”

Chris looked back at him as tears filled his eyes.

“Her name was Clara. I met her when I was sixteen. She got kicked out of school, she was always in trouble...” he briefly smiled at the memory, “I was dating her, Mom didn't know.”

That made perfect sense. Recalling his ex, he felt sure she would have been a strict parent and certainly disapproved of a trouble making girlfriend for her son... _There was no stricter parent than an ex criminal..._

“And she died?”

“Yes,” he replied, “I need to talk to you. I don't think anyone else could understand like you will. But you have to promise you won't tell my Mom.”

His voice sounded tearful.

Oswald didn't have to think about his response.

“Of course I won't. I'm your Father, you can tell me anything.”

“I hope I can!” he said as he brushed away a tear, then he started to talk and didn't stop as the whole truth came out:

“Six months ago, we had an accident – I got Clara pregnant. We didn't tell my Mom, but we started making plans for the future. Then she went to see a doctor to make sure everything was okay. _It wasn't okay...._ ” he looked into the camera, and Oswald knew as only a parent could that his son's eyes reflected absolute heartbreak, “She found out she was sick. She had terminal cancer. They said she wouldn't live more than a few months... not long enough to have the baby. She died in my arms. Have you ever seen someone die, Dad?”

Oswald's heart ached at a long distant memory as he gave his reply.

“My Mother – your Grandmother - died in my arms, Chris.”

His son blinked away more tears.

“Clara knew she wouldn't live long enough to have our baby. So she asked me to save her.”

_And he anxiously tugged at his loose sweatshirt again. Oswald saw the fearful look in his eyes. Oh, no... He got it now, he knew what his son had done..._

“Tell me what you did.”

Christian took a deep breath and his voice trembled as he spoke.

“We have a friend who is training to be a doctor. She wants to specialise in implantation. She was able to remove the baby at twelve weeks and put it into a birthing unit. Then she implanted me with the baby. Clara lived a few more months, long enough to feel the baby move. She died ten days ago. We buried her on Monday. _I'm six months pregnant with my dead girlfriend's baby, Dad. And I'm scared._ ”

Oswald gave a heavy, weary sigh. His son was barely back in his life and already, he was worried for him... most of all he was worried about the safety of that implant. He didn't doubt it was a genuine unit, but it had not been implanted by a fully trained professional... Then another thought him and he gave a groan.

“Your Mother doesn't know, does she? She doesn't know any of it!”

“She probably would have tried to stop me.”

Oswald looked into the camera.

“Just a minute, Chris. Stay there. I need to fetch something.”  
Then he got up, limped over to the drinks cabinet and poured himself a strong measure of scotch. He returned to the table, sat down and took a drink before setting the glass down again.

“Sorry about that, Chris. But I could use a drink after what you just told me! Bearing in mind I have my young child in the house, one drink will have to be all - but right now I could lose myself in a whole damned bottle! What the hell were you thinking? You're eighteen years old! You're _not_ ready to do this, I can see it in your eyes!”

“What else could I have done? Let our baby die with her? Why should I do that when I had the chance to save her?”

Oswald took another sip from the glass.

“It's a little girl?”

“Yes.”

“And the pregnancy is going okay?”

Chris looked at him blankly.

“I assume so. No one knows, Dad! I'm hiding it from Mom, but the baby is getting bigger and I can't hide it for much longer.”

“You need to _tell_ her!”

“She won't understand! She hated Clara!”

“But she loves you,” Oswald reminded him, “And if you sat down with her and told her everything she would want to help you!”

“No, she would say I'm too young to have a child, she would make me give the baby up!”

Oswald looked at his son as he raised his glass and drank some more, taking the edge off this shock with a generous measure of scotch.

“ _I_ think you're too young! I also think you're scared and you're possibly in danger because that implant was put in by an amateur. And I don't think you're emotionally ready, I think childbirth terrifies you -”

“ _It does!”_ he said tearfully.

Oswald leaned back against his seat and gave another sigh.

“Okay. Let me think... You haven't seen a doctor, you're not having this pregnancy monitored?”

Chris shook his head.

“Why not?” Oswald demanded.

“Because it wasn't done legally. And because I'm scared.”

Oswald felt caught between yelling at his son for being so stupid and wanting to wrap his arms around him and hold him tight, and promise him it was all okay.

“I know you wanted to meet me when you found out about me,” he said, “And your Mom said she wanted you to come and stay for a while in Gotham and get to know me. So here's what we will do - but you have to keep your end of the deal: You will come and stay here with me. You can move in, tell your Mom it's for a few months. You can stay and have the baby here and I will give you all the support you need. _But.._. you _must_ see a doctor and get that pregnancy monitored, for your sake and for the baby. I don't care how scared you are, as soon as you get here I'm calling my doctor and making an appointment with her and we will go and see her together. No one will prosecute you for having the implant outside of legal channels. It didn't happen in Gotham, it's not a black market implant, it was just put in by a non qualified person outside of the city. None of that matters here. What matters is, you are not at risk. Do we have a deal?”

Chris hesitated.

“Will you come with me to see the doctor?”

Oswald gave another sigh.

“What are you scared of, Chris?”

He hesitated. As he gave his reply, again it reminded Oswald that his eighteen year old son was really not ready for any of this.

“I don't want anything up my ass. I don't want her to hurt me. And I'll be embarrassed, I don't want to get undressed!”

Oswald shook his head.

“You were eighteen four months ago?”

Chris nodded.

“So you got that implant at _seventeen_ years of age?”

“I don't want to go to jail!”

“You won't,” Oswald replied, “If you have the baby here in Gotham the circumstances of the implantation won't be questioned providing it was a legal implant – it wasn't black market, was it?”

“No, it was a real one.”

“I'm guessing your unqualified doctor friend stole it?”

“Yes.”

“Well, if you come to this city you will get nothing but kindness and support and compassion. But you need to take responsibility. You did a very brave thing to save your girlfriend's baby, but you went about it the wrong way, you did it using a non qualified doctor and you need to have the pregnancy monitored. And when we go and see Doctor Thompkins she _will_ have to give you an internal exam to make sure the implantation scar is closed. It's not supposed to open until labour starts. You _will_ have to undress and let her check you over. I'll come with you but I want you to face this like an adult. You made a very hard decision – and you probably would have been turned down due to your age if you had gone through the proper channels. _But it's happened and you're my son and that baby is my granddaughter!_ ”

“Are you angry with me?” Chris was tearful again.

“I certainly don't feel old enough to be a grandfather!” he said sharply, his voice softened as love shone in his gaze, “No, I'm not angry with you for doing this to save your child! If you can't tell your Mom yet, we will wait until after the baby is born. You don't need the stress of family quarrels at this time. Tell your Mom you spoke to me and I said I'd love to have you come and stay. Then you get in that powerful car of yours and drive _carefully_ to the city, there's a room waiting for you here at my family home.”

Now Chris was smiling.

“I always drive carefully, Dad – I'm pregnant!” he said.

That remark made Oswald smile too. He was too young to be going through this, he wasn't prepared for it, emotionally, and he was scared – but, he was sensible enough to cope. He would learn along the way, with guidance... Just then Chris held out a picture to the camera.

“This was Clara.”

Oswald looked at the picture and felt sad for his loss, in the photo Clara was smiling with a drink in her hand – going by the glazed look in her eyes, she was drunk, and at the time, too young to be drinking at all, but she looked happy, her dark hair fell to her shoulders, she had dark eyes that shone with passion for life and it only seemed to make her loss all the more sad.

“How old was she?” he asked.

“She was my age,” Chris replied.

Oswald shook his head. _Dead at eighteen?_ He didn't blame his son for wanting to save that child, even though the whole process frightened him.

“She was beautiful,” he replied, “And I'm so sorry you lost her. I know how that feels, I recently lost my Edward.”

“I wish I could have met him.”

“I wish you had too,” Oswald said fondly, and then they talked a while longer as they made their plans. By the time the call was finished, Oswald knew his son wouldn't be calling at the weekend – he would be arriving here in Gotham, he was coming to stay. But all the warmth he felt in his heart for his son was overshadowed by a creeping fear he was yet to voice aloud:

Christian needed to see Lee as soon as possible. His implant had been put in by an unqualified doctor. He didn't seem to realise the implications of that. His life could be in danger... Clearly, this was a situation he had to handle right away, Chris and the baby were priority. He would worry about what to say to his ex later, when the situation was under control...

And later, when Jim came home, he needed to tell him about this. He needed to tell him everything - his eldest son was having a crisis, he hoped Jim would be able to accept he needed to take that on. He hoped it wouldn't put him off their own baby plans, and he also hoped Jim would understand when he explained a few things from the past. He needed to tell him everything, including the story of how he got involved with Christian's mother...

 


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

 

Oswald put the booze aside and made a strong coffee. He was glad Eddie was too young to realise his Daddy had been drinking so early in the day, it was an after effect of losing Ed, but at least he could stop at one now, and he had only taken that drink because of the shock of learning the truth about Christian... He took his son into the garden for a while, the leaves were just starting to turn and he watched as he ran about the garden, still happy and unaffected by the thought that Ed would not come home again. He had only cried once when he had told him his father wasn't coming back. In Eddie's young mind, maybe heaven meant not far away, or in another town for a while. He really didn't understand at his young age that Ed would never walk through the door again. In many ways he envied his son for that innocence, to not truly grasp what the pain of grief felt like. But at least he welcomed Jim's presence in the house. And Hope was thrilled to have her father home.

 

By the time Eddie was ready for a nap, Oswald's thoughts had turned to the past. When he saw Jim that night, he would have to tell him all about those days. He wanted him to know everything, including why his brief relationship with Christian's mother had ended so painfully and left him weeping alone...

When Eddie was sleeping, Oswald went through to the kitchen, made another coffee and sat down at the table. He looked to the window, watching as the changing leaves fluttered in the breeze as his memory shifted far back to the days when he was still the king of the underworld, sharing a life with Ed seemed like an impossible dream and he had never imagined he would ever have a spouse or a family or depart from his life of crime...

 

**Eighteen years before:**

 

 _He had helped her out._ She had moved in with a boyfriend, it had turned sour and then she had found herself in need of a place to stay. Oswald had kindly offered to let her stay in his late mother's apartment.

“It's not much, but this place has great sentimental value to me,” he had said as they stood together in the front room filled with old furniture and faded charm from bygone years, “I lived here with Mother for many years.”

Then his gaze had shifted to her photograph and as the pain of her loss hit him all over gain, he had blinked back tears.

“I still miss her.”

“Oh Penguin, don't get upset!”

That was the moment it had happened. The moment that had changed their friendship forever. This pretty young woman who could have had any man in Gotham she chose, wiped a tear from his eye and then hugged him. As she drew back, Oswald had felt moved by the sudden gesture. He had been lonely, so _very_ lonely and as she saw the look in his eyes, she had smiled.

“I know that look. You're not the only one who feels alone sometimes.”

He had stepped back, stiffening as he denied it.

“ _I am not lonely!”_

“I am,” she had replied, “And neither of us has to be... I saw the way you looked at me.”

She leaned in, kissing him as his eyes grew wide and he staggered back, shooting her a shocked look.

“I...I can't do this with you!”

A smile played about her lips.

“Why not? You wouldn't let just anyone stay here, at your mom's old place...”

“I care for you. But I am also a gentleman!”

She giggled and her voice sounded soft as she stepped closer, and as she kissed him again, she slid a hand through his spiked hair The kiss was good and he wanted to fall into it as he clung to her, and she held him gently, then drew back, looking into his eyes.

“You have to stop this,” Oswald said as his voice trembled “I am a gentleman but you are making me forget that!”

His back hit the wall. He was undeniably hard as they kissed again, then she took him by the hand and asked where the bedroom was.

He directed her to his old room, not his Mother's. His heart was pounding as it started to sink in that she actually _wanted_ him... By the time he kissed her as they stood next to the bed, he was ready to be braver, bolder as he cast aside his jacket and kissed her deeply.

“ _Oh Penguin!”_ she whispered, and as her hand slid over his erection, she felt it through the fabric of his suit as her touch gave him a jolt.

“Don't do that... I'm very excited...” he stammered nervously.

She had stripped off her clothing with a gleam in her eyes and pounced, he had fallen back hard on to the bed as the mattress bounced, and then she was on top of him, tugging at his zip.

“ _Where is it?”_ she said playfully as she reached in and grabbed his erection, _“There it is! Oh, don't you ever say you don't want me again, wow, that's a nice cock, Penguin!”_ Then she was sucking him and it was like heaven as he reached down, running his fingers through her hair.

“ _Thank you...”_ he gasped, feeling a wave of emotion threaten to drown him as he welcomed this longed for closeness and intimacy that he had once thought would never be his with anyone... She released him, then she kissed him again.

“You're so cute,”she said as she looked into his eyes.

“I am?” he whispered, wanting to believe this sudden revelation he had never heard before.

She had sucked at his neck and bitten him, he had protested Ed would see it and she had laughed as she reminded him Ed wasn't interested... Then he had reached for her, welcoming more kisses and suddenly she was on top, sliding down and taking him inside as she thrust against him and he struggled to keep up as his damaged leg ached. The headboard was thumping off the wall and the springs were creaking and groaning. The guy in the apartment above was banging on ceiling with something heavy, yelling, _Shut the fuck up down there, Cobblepot!_ She was stimulating herself as she looked down at him, moving with him as her face started to flush.

“ _Oh Penguin, Penguin, yes!”_ she yelled, and as she lost control, so did he, coming hard as she ground against him.

It had been rough and passionate. He had laid there beside her afterwards in a happy, stunned daze.

“May I see you again?” he had asked quietly.

She had smiled and replied with a kiss...

 

 _She had stayed at the apartment for a month._ In that time, he had visited her frequently, bringing roses, sharing dinner with her, it always ended with kisses and passion as she told him she wanted him, and she always said _Penguin_ when she had an orgasm.

She made him walk taller with his shoulders back and a proud sparkle in his eyes. She gave him hope that he had found love. He had even lost his inhibitions, taking a bath with her, making love in the water... The thought would often cross his mind, _I am actually loved. I am desirable!_ In moments when he felt insecure, she would hold him. He had cried in her arms as he had told her he loved her. She had said she loved him too, and he needed to calm down and keep this in perspective. There were lots of reasons why they saw a lot of each other, and this new closeness was good and she didn't want anything to wreck it...

And then it had all come crashing down, on the evening he had arrived at the door, given her roses and then a kiss and later, after dinner, as she started to look at him like he was the dessert, he opened up a ring box.

She stared at it.

“What's this, Oswald?”

He smiled as he fixed his gaze on her over the candlelight.

“I have no desire to treat you like some cheap fling, my dear. I fully intend to make you an honest woman. Be my wife, please say yes, I will make you happy every day!”

She had opened the box and looked at the diamond that sparkled inside.

“Oh, this is really nice,” she said softly, “But I'm way too young to think about getting married. Not yet, not for years... and you're....”

His smile faded.

“I'm what, not good enough for you?”

“No, I didn't say that... Oh, I don't know how to say this! I don't want to spend the rest of my life as one of Gotham's monsters. And you're... _Penguin_.”

Tears filled his eyes.

“What the hell does that mean? I'm not good enough for you? I have my own empire...”

“ _Oswald, I'm not your girlfriend.”_

He stared at her.

“ _Yes, you are!”_

“I'm not,” she replied, “I do love you and I do care but I don't want to get married. I have plans for my life and I don't intend to stay around in this city forever.”

“Then tell me your plans, I can help you make them reality!”

She shook her head.

“No, Oswald, this is something I can do alone. I don't need help with anything!”

He had left soon after, as she had promised to call him the next day and he wondered where the hell he stood with her. Then as he leaned on his cane and limped away down the street, he heard a car pull up and he turned back, stepping into the shadows as he watched a guy get out and ring the buzzer. She had come down and opened the door.

“What the fuck do you want now?” she had demanded, “I told you, I don't need you or anyone!”

“So you've just been hiding away?”

“No, I've been seeing someone. I've been seeing Penguin!”

There was a pause.

“ _Penguin?”_ her ex exclaimed, “Is that supposed make me mad at you? _I feel sorry for the poor guy, lonely, insecure Penguin, the little gang boss with a limp? That cripple who walks with a cane? How could you use him like that! I bet you even told the sad little freak that you loved him!_ ”

“I wasn't using him!” she said sharply.

Oswald didn't stay around to hear any more as he limped away quickly, wiping tears from his face...

He hadn't seen her for a couple of weeks. When he contacted her, she told him she busy and would call him soon. She also said she had decided to quit her job.

_She never called him back._

_A few weeks later, she left the city and never returned..._

 

**Eighteen Years Later:**

 

Oswald blinked away tears. His coffee was getting cold. He pushed it aside as he mentally pushed away thoughts of the past. The one good thing that had come out of that relationship that had left him sobbing like a baby when they parted was the fact that he had son, and he was going to meet him soon...

It wouldn't be easy, handling his ex when she found out that Christian was pregnant. He understood, he completely got why she would be so protective over him, her only child, her son who she had lost at birth who Strange had brought back...Her miracle baby was now a grown man, but clearly, he needed help she couldn't give at a time like this... Oswald was decided now, no matter what the fallout from this situation, he would stand by his son and defend his decision to carry that child, even if it meant invoking the wrath of an ex who he really didn't want to quarrel with after all these years. _And Jim had to know everything. He would tell him tonight..._

 

Much later when Jim arrived, it had grown dark. Oswald had made sure he looked his very best in a dark suit with a silk tie and he had spent a while styling his hair just right. But there was a flicker of worry in his eyes as Jim came up to the open door and joined him. He had a couple of bags with him, he was slowly moving in and the sight of that made Oswald smile, but then as he closed the door, he lowered his voice even though it was late and the kids were sleeping.

“I need to talk to you about something” he said, and Jim left his stuff by the staircase and followed Oswald through to the dining room, where the candles still glowed softly and low, left over from dinner. Oswald sat down and gestured to the seat closest as he had taken his usual pace at the head of the table. Jim sat down at once, being silent and patient because he knew how worked up his Oz could get over problems. He reached out and took his hands in a gentle grasp and looked into his eyes.

“I must explain something and this is not easy,” Oswald began.

Jim had already made a guess – a wrong guess, and started to speak.

“ _If this is about Ed, you're right, we should hold a memorial service for him.”_

Oswald looked as shocked as he felt. He knew he was dead but he was yet to be legally declared dead, not enough time had passed by...

“Jim, why are you rushing this? I am in no hurry to say a final farewell to my husband!”

Jim gave a sigh.

“I'm sorry, Oz. I just thought that it's the very last thing we can do for him – with love – and maybe we should do it sooner rather than later. It would be good for the kids too, a real chance to say goodbye, to help them heal. This is not something I simply want rushed out of the way, to make room for us. I;m trying to consider Ed.”

“I know that!”

“So maybe we should think about doing that soon?”

Sadness shaded Oswald's gaze.

“Perhaps... but that was not what I wanted to talk about!”

Jim was still holding his hands. He had just realised that mentioning a final farewell to Ed had probably made Oswald's situation a lot worse – clearly, he had some worrying news to share.

“Just tell me what's on your mind, I'll listen,” he promised.

One look in Jim's eyes told him he was ready to hear anything, and he would still love him no matter what he was about to say.

Oswald told him everything, from the situation with Christian carrying his late girlfriend's baby, to the story of how he had met his oldest sons mother years back, when she had broken his heart and then left town. And when he had explained it all, Oswald added:

“ _I didn't even know she was pregnant, Jim. She just told me to get myself a new enforcer because she was quitting. And I never saw her again. That is the story of how Brigit Pike broke my heart._ ”

Surprise registered in Jim's eyes.

“ _Christian's mother is Firefly?”_

Oswald gave a sad sigh.

“She was twenty years old and so full of passion, I was much older and knew little about intimacy! She completely took charge that first time we were together. She was always so full of confidence, even those burns of hers didn't hold her back. I've often thought, maybe it was the burns that pushed her onward in life, made her so determined to live her life to the full and to live it alone. She's not Firefly any more. She runs a cosmetics business these days, sells products that hide scars. She's worth millions!”

Jim's detective instinct was kicking in.

“She couldn't have created such an effective product on her own, she was no scientist... I wonder what Strange is doing these days?”

The two men exchanged a glance.

“That's a very good point, Jim! He did revive Christian for her when he was a baby.”

“And Bridgit was very thankful for the work he did to enable her to become Firefly back in the day after she got the terrible burns. I bet the two of them are still friends.”

“I would like to locate Strange,” Oswald added, then he fell silent, looking down at the table.

“You're hoping he can do something for Christian if that implant is poses a risk?”

“Maybe. I don't know if there is a risk until Chris visits her, and I can't make the appointment until he arrives at the weekend.”

The candles stuttered and begin to flicker. Jim blew them out and thin wisps of smoke trailed into the air as he caught the worried look in Oswald's eyes.

“Come on, let's go to bed, stop all this worrying. I'm sure everything will be fine,” he told him, and as Oswald rose from his seat, Jim put an arm around him and they headed for the stairs together.

 

By now it was gone midnight and the house was silent. Oswald undressed quickly, his thoughts still on his worries as Jim did the same and then got in bed beside him. He turned on the lamp and its soft glow filled the bedroom as he turned on his side and ran a gentle hand over his lover's hair.

“Stop worrying,” Jim said softly.

“I'm just concerned the matter with my son might put you off the idea of having another child with me.. a pregnant teenager in the house, who hasn't even told his mother about the situation, who had an implant that wasn't professionally fitted, who might end up having a birth experience like I did with Hope -”

“ _Stop!”_

Oswald looked at him with wide, worried eyes.

“It's going to be fine. If it's not fine, we will still handle it. If he needs help, you're going to make sure he sees a doctor. He's going to be so much better off here with us. And _never_ think a problem with your family would get in the way or stop me loving you, Oswald. I love you and I accept you along with your loss of Ed and all your grief, I also love all your children - and any one of them could have a problem some day. I want to be there to help you when that happens, that's what love is to me. We love each other regardless and we take on the problems together. You will never be alone with anything in life, you can be sure of that.”

He leaned closer, kissing him before Oswald could thank him for his promise.

Then Jim rolled on top of him, kissing him deeply, and as he reached down and felt that implant making him wet and instantly aroused, he wasted no more time, parting his legs and thrusting gently, taking him on his back as he watched every expression on his face and whispered that he loved him. It was gentle, it was tender, and when Oswald came first, Jim let his own control slide away as he throbbed deep inside him, holding him close as he gave another moan of pleasure.

“ _Have my baby, Oz,”_ he whispered, _“I want you to be pregnant again, I love you...”_

After Jim's passion and tenderness, Oswald slept well that night, wrapped in his arms as Jim held him, content to be next to the one he loved. Neither man gave another thought to the possibility of problems in the future, when they happened, they would face them together...

 

_For Ed Nygma, it didn't feel like months had passed since the crash._

He recalled the water, someone taking off his seat belt and shaking him. The car had been a wreck. He remembered waking and getting out into water that was freezing cold and came up to his thighs, then he had staggered to a muddy bank, looked about and tried to remember why he was so worried about _someone_ , but the name was lost to him. He had walked away, stumbled through the woods, found a car parked up and wondered if it was his. Suddenly the events of the crash seemed like a distant dream. He had smiled as he got into the car. The keys were in the ignition. He had started up the engine and then he drove away, but it was a struggle to stay in a straight line, the car kept sliding across to the other lane...

He wasn't sure why this car was so strange to drive or why his vision kept blurring and the world around him seemed too bright. Hours felt like minutes – or was it the other way around? All concept of time was gone now. Then he had pulled over to the side of the road, and that was when the world had turned dark.

Waking up in a hospital with while walls and silence did nothing to help him remember his own name, or why he kept thinking of a handsome little guy who wore expensive suits and walked with a limp.

It was all gone:

_His name, where he was from, who might be missing him..._

Sometimes he had dreams about the guy with the limp, they were great dreams and he hoped he would get lucky and have them every night just before he fell asleep. When he did get lucky and dream of him, he remembered kisses and his closeness and how much he loved him. But he could never explain his past past. Names and places were missing. Now he was just the accident victim who had regained consciousness after three months and spent the last six weeks recovering and solving puzzles and laughing as random riddles popped into his head. Sometimes a voice spoke to him low, a voice only he could hear, and it told him to escape this place. But he had told the doctors about that, and they had put him on meds and now the voice had gone away...

Ed sat alone on bed in his room, looking to a window where beyond, he saw leaves shedding from a tree outside. He was certain it had been summertime only a short while ago... He thought of the man whose image filled his heart with love, but still no name would come.

“Who are you?” he whispered, then he looked down at wedding band on his finger:

_Husband._

The word just clicked into place in his mind. Ed started to smile. At last, something had come back to him. Now he just needed to recall his name, where he was from, and the name of that guy who lived inside his dreams.

“ _I will find you,”_ he murmured as he carried on watching the leaves fall, _“I know you're out there somewhere. I bet you miss me as much as I miss you...”_

 

Many miles away, the weather had been kind for the time of year in Gotham, the rainy skies had held off as the weekend came around and the sun was shining even though October was almost here and the driveway of the mansion was starting to look pretty with the first of the falling leaves that drifted on the cool wind. When the black Porsche rolled up in the drive, Oswald had been waiting with Jim by the front door as he looked out the window through the nets, and smiled to see his son arrive at last.

They had planned for this moment, the kids were over at Tabby's. Oswald wanted time alone to talk to Christian about the whole situation, uninterrupted time. Jim had promised to be there and add support. If Christian was scared, he wouldn't be for much longer.

He came up to the door in light blue jeans and a heavy sweater that covered the bump below his ribcage. He rang the bell and Oswald exchanged a glance with Jim as his eyes sparkled. Then he opened up the door.

“Hello son!” he said warmly.

Christian blinked away tears.

“I'm sorry about this mess, Dad.”

He hugged him on the doorstep, clinging to him as he gave a sob. Oswald held him tightly, and as they hugged, he felt that baby bump push up against him. It worried him, being the man who had outlawed black market implants in the city, he had received a lot of hugs from pregnant people – especially those who had fertility units – and he instantly knew that unit felt way too low...As Christian let go, he managed a smile.

“Thanks for helping out.”

“It's no trouble!” Oswald insisted, “Where are your bags?”

“In the car.”

“I'll get them for you,” Jim said.

“Thanks, they're in the trunk,” Chris handed him car keys and as they stood together in the hallway, Jim went out, leaving the door open as Oswald stood there, looking fondly to his son.

“I want you to feel at home here,” he told him, “When Jim comes back with your bags, we are going through to the front room and we're going to talk about everything. And you don't have to hide your pregnancy in this house.”

“That's a relief!” Chris said, and he took off his sweater as Oswald leaned on his cane and led him down the hallway.

 

They went through to the front room and Oswald paused, looking intently at his son.

“Don't sit down yet.”

“Why not?”

“I need to set my mind at rest,” Oswald replied, reaching out towards the bump below his ribs, “May I?”

Chris nodded, looking nervous as Oswald carefully felt the growing bump. As he placed his hand on it, he felt a kick within and smiled, but then his smile faded as he swept his hand to the place where the unit lay close to his lower rib.

“This unit isn't positioned right,” he said, “It's too low.”

A flicker of panic showed in his son's eyes.

“But I'm fine with it, I'm not in pain, I can eat... I can't lay on my back to sleep any more but I'm doing just fine.”

“I want to make an appointment for you to see Lee,” he added, “She needs to take a look at you, Chris. If that unit is far too low, it could detach too quickly when labour starts and that could force the implant downward very quickly and...”

He paused, seeing fear in his son's eyes, so he didn't say the rest: _Damage to internal organs, internal bleeding, you could wind up with injuries like I had with Hope's birth..._

“It could injure you,” Oswald said, “This is why these implants have to be placed by a proper doctor. I realise your friend was helping you, but no one should ever have a unit implanted by someone who isn't properly trained. I'm sure it will be okay, you just need to keep the pregnancy monitored.”

“And you'll come with me?” he asked, sounding nervous.

“Yes, of course I will,” Oswald promised.

Jim returned with the bags and set them down near the stairs, then he went to the front room to join Oswald and his son.

“Nice to meet you, Christian,” he said, shaking his hand, “I'm Jim.”

“Hi, Jim,” he replied.

Then Jim glanced to the bump beneath his ribcage that he could not fail to notice.

“So who put the implant in?”

Chris shook his head.

“A friend. A trainee doctor. I wouldn't name her, she doesn't deserve the trouble. She saved Lauren.”

Oswald smiled.

“You already have a name for your daughter?”

“Clara chose it before she died.”

His son's gaze shifted to the wedding picture on the wall.

“I wish I could have met Ed, the game show host – and criminal!” he laughed.

Oswald smiled on hearing that.

“I see your mother has been filling in the details from the bad old days – not too many, I hope! Come and sit down, let's talk some more. Jim, would you make us some tea, please?”

“Sure,” Jim replied, giving Oswald a smile, then he left the room as Oswald sat on the sofa and Chris sat beside him.

“I'm so glad to be here,” Chris added as he got comfortable. It warmed Oswald's heart as he noticed his son had slid his arm around his baby bump to cradle it protectively.

“I never felt safe at home. Mom would have gone to the cops. She would have made me tell them who did the implant, she would have made me get rid of the baby.”

“I honestly think your mother would have been very worried and upset and yes, probably furious, I know how Brigit would react – but she wouldn't have made you get rid of the baby, Chris. When that child is born and she meets her, she will love her, I'm sure of it!”

They talked some more regarding his worries about telling his mother, then Jim returned and set the tea on the table and sat down on a comfortable chair at a distance from Oswald and his son, wanting to be there but at the same time, aware they needed this time to bond.

“I'm not worried about the implant,” Chris added, “It's a genuine unit.”

“But it can be just as dangerous if it's in the wrong place,” Oswald explained, “No one would make you give up the baby. Certainly, no one would suggest terminating the pregnancy. Difficult pregnancies can be managed with a lot of monitoring. I had to see my doctor every two weeks when I was carrying Eddie, because of the damage I got to internal organs years before when I carried Hope with the black market implant. But I was fine, Eddie's birth was easy! I went into labour very quickly, I gave birth in the bathroom, Lee barely had time to turn up here to help with the delivery!”

That nervous look was back in his eyes.

“I've got three months to go,” Chris said, “It's not long...”

“And you have nothing to fear,” Oswald assured him as he paused to pour the tea.

Then Jim spoke up.

“You're absolutely certain the implant was genuine?”

“Yes,” Chris replied, “She took it from a new batch of stock...”

“You mean the medical student who stole it?”

Chris forced a nervous smile.

“I'm not saying more about that. She had every good intention. You're starting to sound like a cop.”

Jim laughed.

“I am a cop, Chris.”

Oswald had just set his tea down as his son got up sharply, and as he heard a _click_ , he looked up in alarm:

Chris had just whipped a gun from the back of his jeans, and he was holding it in a very steady grip, the kind of grip used by one who was used to handling weapons... _So Firefly had given her son shooting lessons, that was just fucking great..._

“Put it down!” Oswald ordered as he grabbed his cane and got up.

Jim had got up from his seat too, holding up his hands in a calming gesture. It was his day off, he wasn't carrying his gun... Chris stepped back, glancing to his father, then to Jim as he kept his gun trained on him.

“Dad, I can't believe you did this to me!” he said tearfully, “I came to you to protect my baby and you set me up with a cop?”

“It's not like that,” Jim said, staying calm, “Listen to me, Chris... I'm here because I'm with Oswald.”

Chris shook his head.

“ _This is a set up! You want to arrest me and charge me and find out who stole the unit, then you want to throw me in jail and take the baby when she's born! I won't let anyone take my baby, I will kill for Lauren!”_

Oswald shot Jim a warning glance.

“He's pregnant,” he reminded him, “I can handle this.”

Then Oswald stepped closer as his son looked at him sharply, keeping the gun trained on Jim.

“Listen, Christian!” Oswald said firmly, “When I was pregnant with Hope, I hid my pregnancy too. I was in a gang fight. A guy almost knifed me. I killed him for it to protect my baby. I know how it feels! But Jim is _not_ here to bust you! He's my lover, he's also Hope's father!”

His finger moved away from the trigger. Oswald reached out carefully, taking the gun from his grasp and locking the safety immediately. Chris gave a sob.

“It's okay,” Oswald said as he hugged him tightly, “I know what it's like to be scared... you just want to keep your baby safe.”

Jim stared at him.

“Your pregnant, irrational teenage son just pulled a _gun_ on me, Oz!”

Oswald was still holding Chris as he glared at him.

“He's afraid and he's been keeping this secret for months! I remember how _that_ felt! The day I walked into the GCPD to tell you about Hope and you didn't have the time to listen? Do you remember _that_ , Jim?”

He did remember it. He gave a deep sigh.

“I think maybe I should go and let you both have some time to talk things through. He needs to understand I'm not a threat.”

“He _does_ understand that!”

Chris stepped back from his father's embrace and wiped his eyes.

“I'm sorry, Jim,” he said tearfully, “You don't know what it's been like, I've been so scared!”

Jim wished he could understand, but right now, he had just had a gun shoved in his face. Clearly, Chris needed to calm the fuck down before he could set foot in the house again...

“I'm going home,” Jim said, and he saw the look of dismay in Oswald's eyes, “I love you, but I understand you need this time alone with Christian. I'll call you tomorrow.”

“But Jim -”

“Look after your son,” he added, then he walked out of the room.

As Oswald heard the door slam, Chris looked at him tearfully.

“ _I'm sorry!”_

Oswald gave a heavy sigh. The last thing he needed right now was problems with Jim, they had only just got together again...

“I've been where you are,” Oswald replied, “I know how scared you got when you misunderstood. But you're not carrying a gun any more!”

Chris stared at him.

“It's mine, it's legal!”

“And shooting people isn't, especially not the one I love!” Oswald told him firmly, “This gun is going in the safe, and you will sit down, shut up and listen to me! We need to have a serious talk about you getting a grip on life. This baby isn't going to go away and you have to deal with the choice you made.”

Then Oswald laid the gun aside and sat down again with his son, feeling weary already. Life had been going just fine and now _, this_ had happened...

“Jim is my partner. He would _never_ report you for the stolen unit. He wants to help as much as I do. Please understand that now and remember it!”

A sudden look of dismay came to his eyes as the panic subsided and Chris realised what he had done. He sat there cradling his baby bump as he blinked away tears.

“I didn't mean to mess things up with you and Jim! I'm _so_ sorry!”

“Jim and I will be just fine,” Oswald replied, then he hugged his son tightly again as he thought of Jim and silently hoped they would be okay – they had only been together a short while, and their relationship was under strain already. _Maybe Jim couldn't cope with the pressure of his family problems._ That thought struck terror into his heart, that he might lose him over this latest disaster... but he said no more about it, focusing on his tearful son as he tried to be a supportive father and hoped his reassurance at this tough time would make up for the lost years...

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

 

The next few weeks passed by without incident. The house was peaceful, there were no more problems. Chris got on well with Hope and little Eddie, and he had apologised to Jim more than once – but only on the phone. Oswald had gone to visit Jim at his apartment, Jim had been as close and loving as ever, but Oswald was reluctant to leave the kids and they couldn't stay with Tabby every night. It wasn't that he didn't trust Chris, he had got to know him and realised the gun incident had been isolated – but he wanted to be there for all his children, and Jim wasn't ready to be there for any of them, it seemed...

“ _You guys need time,”_ Jim told him when he asked why he didn't come over to the house.

Oswald accepted that, because to question it could have lead to a quarrel and after what had happened, that was the very last thing he wanted. He was also impatient to get Chris an appointment with Lee, but she was booked solid and it would be another week before she could see him for the first time and take him on to her patient list. Oswald had apologised for the delay. His son had looked relieved - he wasn't exactly looking forward to _any_ procedures connected with childbirth.

Oswald had talked in depth with Jim about the gun incident. He had also reminded him how he had felt many years before, when he had cried, alone and pregnant as he had struggled and failed to tell him about Hope. He was sure Jim understood, it was just that he was being cautious, giving the family the time they needed to adjust. At least, that was all he hoped it was. To lose Jim now would be unthinkable. But he went along with his wishes, seeing him twice a week at the apartment, and the rest of the time, he missed him deeply.

 

Then one morning in late October, Oswald was standing in the shower when he scratched at his arm. Then he looked down and realised the heat of the water had made a distinctive rash rise: an interaction between the chemicals in the active fertility unit were showing up on his skin...he started to smile, then he remembered Jim wasn't here to share the news. He turned off the water and grabbed a towel, then made a dash to get dry, get dressed and snatch a pregnancy test from the cabinet in the bathroom. It had been sitting there for weeks, ever since Jim had brought it home when they had decided to start trying for a baby...

He did the test and left it in the bathroom while he styled his hair and put on cologne. His heart was racing and he could feel his apprehension rising as he thought about that moment he went back in there and turned the test over.

He knew sometimes, the rash meant the first sign of pregnancy. Other times it meant the implant had simply become well established and was giving off a heavier amount of chemicals than before... this could go either way. He knew the rash had been the first sign with Eddie, and it could be the first sign with... _What would they call this next baby? He and Jim were yet to think about names... Jim's baby... Did he have Jim's baby growing inside him?_

Oswald went back into the bathroom and snatched up the test and looked down at it.

“ _Yes!”_ he said joyfully as he saw the word _Pregnant_ , then he limped quickly from the bathroom and grabbed his phone. _No._ He put it down again. T _elling Jim on the phone? Out of the question. He wanted to find him right now and tell him face to face..._

 

After grabbing his cane and hurrying downstairs, he had found his kids in the front room. _His kids._ He felt such a warm glow wrap around his heart as he looked at them:

Grown up Christian, lounging heavily pregnant on the couch as he watched TV. Hope was on the other sofa, looking down at her phone as she laughed at some stupid joke one of her friends had posted online. And little Eddie was on the rug, making scribbles with crayons as he drew a colourful picture.

“ _I have good news!”_

They all looked up at him.

“ _I'm pregnant!”_ Oswald said, barely able to contain his excitement.

Hope got up and hugged him, then he went over to Eddie and as he smiled up at him, he spoke again, addressing his young son:

“You have a baby brother or sister,” he said, indicating to the space below his ribcage as he tapped a finger against his jacket, “They are very small, in here for now but soon I'll get bigger like your brother Chris!”

And Chris gave a groan and swore under his breath as he got up from the sofa and paused to put a hand to his aching back.

“I bet you won't be so thrilled when you get to seven months!”

“Yes I will!” Oswald insisted, then he glanced to his daughter, “Hope, I want you to watch Eddie for me. I'm going over to the GCPD to tell Jim the good news!” then he turned back to Chris, “We're taking your car today.”

“We?” said Chris.

“Yes, you're coming with me. If Jim sees you can walk into a room full of cops, he will know you've got over your mistrust. It will help. And I _want_ you to come with me. And I'm so happy, I want to drive that gorgeous car of yours!”

Chris smiled.

“Okay, Dad, I'll come with you.”

 

Walking into the GCPD to say those three words, _Jim, I'm pregnant,_ brought back a flood of memories for Oswald – fifteen years ago, he had limped into this building, tired and sick from hiding a pregnancy that was full of problems that he had kept secret, and he had not been able to speak the words as Jim had barely glanced at him.

_It was different this time._

Oswald walked in with Christian, who was wearing a warm coat but had left it open because now, he was used to not hiding his pregnancy. At that moment Jim left his office and as Oswald said his name, he glanced over as surprise registered on his face, then he came over to join him.

“Oswald!” he said warmly, “This is a great surprise – and it's good to see you too, Chris!”

Oswald's son said nothing as he stood there with a smile on his face, waiting for his Dad to make the announcement. Oswald turned to Jim, looking into his eyes as he said words that had once been impossible but now flowed out easily, with love and pride:  
_“Jim, I'm pregnant!”_

Jim's face lit up in a big smile as he swept Oswald into his arms and hugged him tightly, then kissed him tenderly.

“That's wonderful news!” he said, and his voice had become choked with emotion.

A few colleagues nearby had overheard,and as a ripple of applause went around the room, along with words of warmest congratulations, Jim could only smile as he looked to the cops he worked with every day and thank them for their show of love. The whole city knew the story of Hope's birth and how Oswald had almost died bringing Jim's daughter into the world, they also knew of Oswald's brave fight to end the trade in black market implants. To know Jim and Oswald were back together and having another baby was the best news ever...

They stayed for a short while, then Jim had to get back to work. But before they left, he hugged Oswald again, then hugged Chris, and told Oswald he would definitely be over to the house tonight. They left for home feeling happy. For Oswald, a big problem had just been resolved – Jim had clearly seen Chris trusted him now. And the joy he had seen in Jim's eyes on hearing about the baby was the best thing Oswald could have wished for. It was all getting better now, they would be closer. Jim would be moving back in...

 

_It did get better._

Jim started staying every night and moving more of his stuff in, he spent time with all the kids, he got to know Christian very well and the two of them were building a great relationship. Oswald called Lee and managed to get his appointment the same morning as Christian, unfortunately it was a day when Jim would be working, but he had stayed over the night before and was up before anyone else, making breakfast and then helping to keep an eye on Eddie, who was wide awake and full of energy after his breakfast, and had run off to get his crayons. Then Hope had yelled out she couldn't find her homework, and was it on the table downstairs? Jim went to find it for her.

While this was happening, Oswald was in the kitchen, wrapped in a silk robe, his hair hanging in his eyes as he lazily sipped his morning coffee. Christian was yet to get up, he knew he was feeling nervous about seeing Lee and he didn't want to wake him before he really had to. He knew today would be tough on his young, nervous son who had never in his life planned to one day carry a child, not until circumstances had given him no other option...

Jim had found Hope's homework and gone back upstairs and handed it to her, then he had hurried back downstairs to hear a loud and fast scratching, scribbling sound that _wasn't_ on paper... There was little Eddie, making a very fast, very bright red scribble on the wall as he clutched at the crayon smiling, watching the pattern get bigger and bigger

“What are you doing, Eddie?” he said.

The little boy turned form the mess on the wall and smiled up at him.

“I'm making a swirly swirly!” he said excitedly.

“You can't do that on the wall,” Jim told him kindly.

“Yes, Eddie's wall!” he replied, and carried on scribbling.

“No!” Jim said, and took the crayon from his hand.

Eddie turned to him, looking up as his face went red like an angry Oswald and his eyes shone like a furious Riddler.

“ _MY Crayon!”_ he yelled, _“Give it back to Eddie, you're not Father!”_

He reached up, then thumped a little fist on Jim's leg, then he screamed as anger filled his eyes and threw himself on the floor, kicking and punching at the polished surface.

“ _I WANT IT BAAAAAACK!”_ he screeched.

Jim reached down to lift him up.

“Calm down, Eddie -”

Tiny teeth sunk into the back of his hand as Jim gave a yelp, then he turned again to lift him and a little boot smacked him in the face.

“That's enough!” Jim said sternly, holding out the sobbing, angry toddler at a safe distance as he kicked at the air and wailed.

Just then Hope hurried down the stairs. She shot a dismayed look at Eddie, and saw a small bruise under Jim's eye.

“Oh no Jim, you invoked his wrath!” she exclaimed, wincing as another piercing scream hit the air and Eddie 's tantrum carried on.

Oswald had grabbed his cane and limped into the hallway, looking apologetically at Jim. He saw the mess on the wall and reached out, lifting Eddie into his arms.

“ _Stop it!”_ he said firmly, _“Naughty boy!”_

“ _I want FATHER!!!!”_ Eddie yelled, and Oswald held his son tightly, and Eddie clung to his Daddy, burying his face in his shoulder as he sobbed and the name _Father_ was said over and over again, along with _Heaven_ and _Not_ _fair_.

“ _Shh,”_ Oswald said softly as he stroked Eddie's hair and the child carried on sobbing, “Father isn't here, my dear, he died...But he would not have let you draw on the walls, either! Say sorry to Jim.”

“ _No!”_ he yelled, _“He took Eddie's crayon!”_

Oswald carried on cradling his son as he looked apologetically to Jim. That bruise was coming upon Jim's face, it was only small, but it would show.

“I'm so sorry about Eddie... Forgive me, Jim.”

Jim forced a smile as his eye throbbed. This would certainly be amusing when he went to work and his colleagues heard the story of how Riddler's son kicked Detective Gordon in the face...

“I've had worse out on the street, making arrests!”

Oswald looked so upset he wanted to hug him, but he still had Eddie in his arms.

“There's nothing to forgive, he's almost three, it was a tantrum.”

Just then Christian came downstairs. He had showered and got dressed but looked tired.

“What the hell was all that noise about?”

“You'll find out in a couple of years when Lauren has a tantrum, they all do it at this age,” Oswald replied, and as Eddie clung to his Daddy, he raised his tearful face from his shoulder and reached out his hand.

“ _Chris, Chris!”_ he said urgently, _“Jim got my crayon! Get it back for Eddie!”_

Chris laughed as he joined them.

“I can't do that...Oh my god, _look_ at the wall!”

Oswald looked at the wall and gave a sigh.

“I'll have to clean that up later.”

“And I need to go to work,” Jim added, he leaned in, giving Oswald a quick kiss as Eddie turned around with his eyes blazing.

“ _My crayon, mine -”_

“Daddy can have it,” Jim said, handing the crayon to Oswald, whose eyes registered alarm as he glanced at the small teeth marks in Jim's hand.

“He _bit_ you? I'm so sorry! This is like that time in the supermarket when he threw himself on the floor and screamed for five whole minutes! I was mortified. People stared. Thankfully Ed calmed him down....” he felt a sudden ache at the memory, as in that moment he missed Ed sharply and it showed in his eyes, “I'm so sorry about your eye and your hand, and for Eddie's behaviour.”

“Oz, it's okay! I have to go to now, I'll see you tonight,”

Jim left the house, closing the door quietly as Eddie looked up the hallway, his eyes blazing again.

“ _He got Eddie's crayon!”_

“And you do NOT draw on walls, young man!” Oswald said firmly, “That's wrong! You draw on paper or I will take _all_ of your crayons away, do you understand, me?”

Eddie nodded silently. Oswald set him down on the floor again.

“And say sorry to Jim when he comes home tonight!” he reminded him, then he checked his watch as he glanced to his daughter.

“Tabby should be here in twenty minutes to take you to school, Hope. She's looking after Eddie this morning while Christian and I go and see Lee. I'd better warn her Eddie's in one of his moods!” then he noticed Christian looked very nervous.

“It will be okay, don't worry,” he assured him.

 

A short while later, Tabby turned up to take Hope to school. She had looked at the scribble on the wall and laughed, then Oswald had given Tabby all of Eddie's crayons and told her to be sure he used paper, he was going through a phase of drawing on walls...

“He'd better not do that today!” she exclaimed, “We're spending the morning at Auntie Barbara's place!”

After the kids had left, he had another coffee with Christian, and spoke to him about Lee, trying to set this mind at ease. But Chris was pale and slightly shaky. He looked like he wanted to throw up.

“It will be fine,” Oswald promised, as he hoped Chris would cope with the examination. He had never seen anyone look so nervous about seeing a doctor before...

 

Later that morning, they had taken the drive over to the hospital, and while they sat in the waiting area, Chris had gone silent, his face turning even more pale as he looked nervously towards the door that said _Dr L Thompkins._

“I want to go,” he said quietly, “I can't do this!”

Oswald turned to him with a look of disbelief on his face.

“How the hell did your med student friend manage to implant you in the first place? Did she have to knock you out?”

Chris was looking down at the floor.

“No, I was too scared to let her put me to sleep.”

“So she used the new method, the anaesthetic gel?”

Chris turned his head and lowered his voice.

“She couldn't find any. _So I drank a bottle of vodk_ a.”

Oswald briefly closed his eyes as he inhaled, then breathed out slowly, containing his temper as he snapped his eyes open again and glared at his son.

“So your child was implanted in a body full of alcohol?”

“It was my last drink, I have _not_ had a drink since!”

“But have you been eating well?”

Chris looked away again, then still feeling his father's eyes burning into him, he reluctantly met his gaze.

“Yes, not especially healthy, just the stuff I usually eat, pizza, burgers, _normal_ food.”

Oswald gave a heavy sigh.

“Well thank goodness you eat organic food now you live with me! I won't have trash on the dinner table, not when there's a growing baby to think of!”

Just then the door opened and Lee looked to Oswald and his son.

“Oswald!” she said with a smile, “Congratulations! Baby number three on the way!”

“Thank you, Lee!” he said warmly.

Oswald leaned on his cane as he got up. He limped over to the doorway, then looked back at Chris, who shot him a reluctant glance then got up too and joined him as they went into the office together.

 

As Lee sat at her desk, Oswald and Christian sat together on the other side of it. Oswald had a big smile on his face as he talked about how happy he was in his new relationship with Jim. Chris said nothing as he sat beside him biting his nails and nervously glancing about the room. Then Lee turned her attention from Oswald to his son.

“Your Dad's told me all about you,” she said, “And I think what you're doing, carrying your late girlfriend's baby, is a wonderful thing. I also know the implant was put in by a non qualified person and that concerns me - but I'm here to look after you and the baby, the circumstances don't come into it, no one is going to call the cops or ask questions. I realise you're nervous, you're very young to be doing this and I'm sure when you were dating your girlfriend, carrying her baby one day had never been in your plans until the situation changed. You look very scared, are you okay?”

Chris nodded, looking back at her like a deer caught in headlights.

“I think,” Lee said, glancing to Oswald then his son, “It might be best if I check Oswald first and then you afterwards. Oswald, would it be okay if I get you ready and then maybe Chris can come and sit with you while I check you over, so he can see there's nothing to be scared about?”

“Fine,” Oswald replied, “I think that's a good idea.”

Then she looked back at his son.

“Chris, I need to talk to you first... You don't have to be scared about the exam. I realise this might be scary and embarrassing but remember, you did _make_ this baby. I take it you had an active sex life with your girlfriend?”

“Yes, very,” he said quietly as he blushed and looked away.

“So it's not like you've never been undressed in front of another person before. And you do know I see guys bodies every day, it's just work to me?”

He nodded.

“This might sound like an awkward question, but have you ever had an internal exam before?”

“No,” he whispered.

“Have you ever had any kind of anal penetration?” she asked cautiously.

He looked up and met her gaze, suddenly losing his shyness.

“Yes, lots! I used to be very adventurous with Clara. I've given her anal many times!”

Oswald chuckled as he looked away, shaking his head. Lee gave a sigh.

“No Chris, I meant, have _you_ -”

“Oh, I see.... No, not me personally,” he added.

“So what about when the implant was put in? Did you have any problems with the insertion?”

“No, I was drunk,” he replied.

Lee stared at him. Oswald felt awkward.

“It's not how it sounds. The person who put it in for him couldn't get hold of anaesthetic gel and my son was feeling extremely nervous.”

“Well, we don't give alcohol to pregnant guys here,” Lee replied, “You'll just have to try and relax, Chris.”

Then she got up and went over to a doorway on the other side of the room.

“Ready, Oswald?”

He got up and joined her as Chris stayed in his seat.

“I'll let you know when to come in,” Lee told him.

As she went into the treatment room, Oswald turned back and lowered his voice as he shot his son a warning look.

“Do _not_ run away!” he said, then he went inside and closed the door behind him.

 

When Lee opened the door again and called Chris into the room, he walked in to see his Dad lying on his back with a sheet covering the lower half of his body. Lee put a chair next to Oswald, and Chris sat down with his back to his lower body as he looked into his eyes and Oswald saw worry reflect there.

“There is nothing to worry about!” Oswald insisted, “Just talk to me, you'll see I'm not in any pain.”

“This is scary, at least it will be for me,” Chris replied quietly.

Then Lee spoke up.

“Okay Oswald, I'm going to check the seal is closed.”

“Don't lose your watch!” Oswald said as he laughed.

Lee laughed too.

“I think it's strapped on securely, Oswald!”

As he looked up, he saw a brief moment of shock on his son's face, then to his relief, Chris managed a smile.

“There's nothing to it,” Oswald to him, “It doesn't hurt at all. Lee is very gentle.”

Lee had already finished the exam and she turned away to take off her gloves and dispose of them.

“The seal is closed up, it's perfect,” she assured him.

“When did she do the exam?” Chris exclaimed.

“Just now, while we were talking. I told you there's nothing to it!”

“Would you like to stay and see how I do your Dad's scan?” Lee asked.

“Okay,” his son replied.

Moments later, Lee scanned the tiny implant and pointed out the little grain in its centre, visible on a monitor.

“It's performing well considering there's a ten percent implantation detachment from the car accident,” Lee said, “It's established well enough. You might be compromised for the amount of chemicals that expel to help the birthing process when the times comes, Oswald. You might need an assisted birth - but there's no real problems here, it's a healthy pregnancy.”

As Oswald saw the implant and the small life inside it, he blinked away tears.

“Ed's implant. Jim's baby,” he said as he smiled and love shone in his gaze.

 

After Lee had finished with Oswald, Chris waited outside while his Dad got dressed again, then he joined him and told him he could go in now, and he would see him in a minute.

“Make sure you stay with me!” Chris said as fear shone in his eyes.

“I will sit with you,” Oswald promised him, “Just go in there and get ready.”

He hesitated. Lee came to the doorway and smiled kindly at Chris.

“Come with me, it's okay,” she assured him, and Chris went inside, casting a glance back at his Dad before the door closed.

Oswald stood there waiting. Then he heard a sob from the next room and Lee opened the door again as she lowered her voice.

“Can you come in, Oswald? He's crying.”

Oswald gave a heavy sigh and went back into the room. Chris was sitting on a chair in the corner of the room sobbing. He went over to him and gave him a brief hug.

“Lee can't examine you if you don't get undressed,” he said.

Chris looked up at him as tears streaked his face.

“ _I can't do this!”_

Oswald leaned on his cane, bending eye level with his son as he spoke softly to him.

“You have to. There's a baby inside you. If you don't do this, you're not looking after yourself or Lauren.”

Chris nodded.

“Okay...” he was shaking. Oswald's heart ached at the sight of his terrified son.

“I'm going to wait outside until you're ready,” he said, “Just take your jeans and your underwear off and lie down on the table. Nothing bad will happen.”

Chris nodded again as he wiped his eyes, then Oswald left the room and closed the door behind him, pausing to lean against the wall as he gave a sigh and wondered how the hell his son could cope with childbirth if he couldn't handle a simple exam...

This time the wait was a little longer and then Lee opened the door again.

“He's ready - at last!” she said, keeping her voice low.

Oswald went back into the room and took a seat next to his son, turning his back to his lower body as he took hold of his shaking hand.

“There's nothing to it,” he reminded him.

“Try and relax,” Lee said.

Chris gave a gasp and tensed.

“It's okay,” Oswald assured him.

“I can't examine you if you tense up, Chris,” Lee reminded him, “Just talk to him, Oswald.”

“Do you want me to stay for the scan?” he asked his son, “It's really important you have that scan.”

As he felt her try and examine him again he tensed.

“ _No.... no don't do this...”_

Lee tried a different approach.

“Honestly Chris,” she said, “In all the years I've done this I've never hurt anyone. Nor have I lost my watch, fallen in or got my head stuck!”

Oswald laughed.

“Even with me!” he exclaimed, and Lee laughed again and this time, Chris laughed too. He felt a slight pressure and then it was gone.

“You'll be pleased to know there's nothing wrong with the implantation seal.” she told him, walking away to take off her gloves.

Chris looked up at his Dad.

“That's it? She's done it?”

“I told you there was nothing to worry about!” Oswald replied.

After that, Chris relaxed more. Oswald sat with him as Lee scanned him, and it was a joyful moment to see the baby on the screen.

“She's a good healthy size,” Lee said as she looked at the monitor, “But you're definitely not seven months pregnant Chris. You're more like eight. Two weeks from now, this baby could come at any time.”

His smile faded as he looked up at his Dad and an anxious look came to his eyes.

“What about the positioning of the implant?” Oswald asked.

She carefully slid the device over his baby bump again, looking intently at the screen. _And that was when Oswald knew there was something wrong. Lee was never this quiet this long when looking at a third trimester scan..._

She turned the scanner off and put the sheet back up to Christian's hips.

“You can get dressed now,” she said, “We'll see you in my office as soon as you're ready. Oswald?”

He caught the look in her eyes.

“Of course,” he replied, then he forced a smile as he got up from his seat and looked down at his son.

“You did really well, I'm proud of you,” he said, then he followed Lee out of the room, leaving his son to get dressed again.

 

While Chris was getting dressed, Oswald sat down at the desk and anxiously looked across it at Lee.

“How serious is this problem?”

She kept her voice hushed.

“The implant is too low. The artificial birth canal is growing downward towards the implantation scar correctly and it's all working as it should – but the positioning of the implant could mean there's a risk of injury to internal organs as labour starts and the implant pushes the baby downward.”

He had been fearing this news, but it was still a shock to hear it confirmed.

“He could have problems like I did with Hope?”

“Yes and no, not exactly the same – your implant ruptured. His won't do that, but he's at risk of internal bleeding and damage to organs because of the route to will take to reach the scar and expel from the body.”

“ _Oh god no...”_ Oswald blinked away tears.

Then the door opened and Chris returned. He looked much more relaxed now as he sat down next to his father.

“Chris,” Lee said carefully, “Your scan showed a possible problem. The baby is fine, everything is working as it should and you will most likely have a normal delivery with no complication. But, you _are_ at risk of internal bleeding and possible damage to organs because the implant was placed too low.”

There was a flicker of worry back in his eyes.

“So what can we do about that?”

“You will have to come and see me once a week for a scan, and we'll keep it monitored. You're not too far off your due date and we can keep a close eye on things. If you do get any bleeding or damage to organs, it will most likely become known after the birth. There's a drug we can give you that can stop the bleeding, it's a new drug and in most cases it works well. But it has a risk of side effects and they can be very serious – there's a risk of damage to the nervous system, paralysis, brain haemorrhage - it's not a treatment we would give under regular circumstances, but it it's the only alternative to surgery, which can be even more dangerous, as you know, Oswald – that was the _only_ option when Hope was born. But the drug can help under extreme circumstances if the risks are considered.”

Chris had turned pale again.

“Are you saying I could get hurt like Dad did when Hope was born?”

“It's a risk,” Lee replied, “It's not definite. But _if_ you do have internal bleeds and possible injury or damage to organs, I want to know beforehand if you want the drug administered or not. You should go home and talk to your Dad about this,” she looked to Oswald, “It may not happen, but we have to be ready for the possibility.”

Oswald nodded.

“So it's not definite?”

“No,” Lee replied, “But I'm thinking about the positioning of the unit and the risk it poses.”

Chris gave a deep sigh.

“So I might be okay... this is just a slight risk?”

“It's a present risk to be aware of, but not a certainty.”

“But my baby is okay?”

“Yes, your baby will be just fine, she's healthy and strong.”

 _So was Hope_ , _and I almost died,_ Oswald thought silently as he kept his fears to himself. It was unthinkable that Christian could go through the same ordeal he had fifteen years before... They finished the consultation and Lee made an appointment for Oswald later in the month, to check on the implant, and then she made an appointment next week for Chris.

“I'll come with you every time, for every appointment,” Oswald promised his son, then he thanked Lee for her time and they left together.

 

On the way home, Chris only mentioned the complications once. Then he brightened up considerably as he said he wasn't scared to be examined any more, and then he thanked his Dad for being there.

“I couldn't cope with any of this with out you,” said Chris.

Oswald forced a smile, holding his worries back.

“I'm very proud of you, son,” was all he said in reply.

When they got home, Chris went upstairs to rest. Oswald checked his phone and found two messages:

One was from Jim, who said he loved the picture of the scan he had sent him, and he said he would see him later and added a red heart emoji and three kisses. The other message was from Barbara, with the text all in capitals as she enclosed a picture of little Eddie's latest artwork:

A large crayon mess had been scribbled on her shiny marble floor and she had wrote, _WTF IS A SWIRLY SWIRLY, OSWALD? I AM NOT IMPRESSED!_

He had sent her a quick apology, and smiled as he did it. Then his smile faded, his thoughts still with Chris. He desperately needed to talk to Jim about his worries, and he felt bad about doing so. His youngest son had bitten and kicked him that morning, and this evening, he was about to cry on his shoulder over his fears for his eldest son, who possibly risked dying in childbirth because of the complications with the implant.. he just hoped Jim was able to take all of this on. It was a lot to take on, him and his kids and their problems...

 

Later that night, after a family dinner that involved no tantrums from Eddie, Chris had sat there at the table and talked about all Lee had explained.

“I'm not worried now,” he had said, “I know there's a risk, but I think I'll probably be okay. I feel fine, there's nothing wrong with me.”

And it had been a relief to see him so relaxed, even if it seemed he didn't quite grasp the seriousness of the situation. Or maybe he was being optimistic, now he had found new confidence in his ability to face the things that scared him.

_But Oswald couldn't hide his fears._

That night, when he closed the bedroom door and Jim sat down with him on the bed, the first thing he had done was kiss him deeply, but as he drew away, Jim was shocked to see Oswald was on the brink of tears.

“What's the matter, Oz?” he asked, at once concerned for his lover as all thoughts of making love slipped away.

Oswald blinked away tears.

“This risk to Christian is quite considerable,” he said, “It's not a small possibility and it's not a risk of small bleeds, either. He could go through the same ordeal I did with Hope. _I could lose my son, Jim!_ ”

As Oswald started to weep, Jim pulled him into a tight embrace, wishing he could promise him that was not the case – but he was still scarred by the memory of almost losing Oz fifteen years before, he always would be – bad memories didn't fade. The fact that Chris might face the same fate was unthinkable, and he didn't even want to imagine what a loss like that would do to Oswald.

“ _I'm so scared for him, I can't lose my boy!”_ Oswald said tearfully as he wept in his arms. Jim held him tighter, placing a kiss in his dark spiked hair as he wept against his shoulder.

“I'm here for you, Oz,” he said softly. It was all he could say, it was all he could do, giving him a promise to be there for him as he held him and let him weep heavily as Oswald cried in his arms and faced up to the very real risk that he could lose his eldest son...

 


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

 

For the next few days, Jim did all he could to support Oswald. It didn't take much, just hugs and listening, then words of reassurance that he was not alone with his concerns. Eddie had stopped drawing on the walls, at least for now - his new habit was climbing up to turn on taps and leaving the water running. Jim told him to stop. He screamed and threw himself on the floor and had a full scale tantrum. Oswald had to step in, worried, tired Oswald who was starting to feel drained as pregnancy symptoms kicked in. He slept more, he ate more, he got up late. Jim tried to change his working hours, so he could help more often with the school run. Christian's next appointment came with Lee and Oswald went with him, and he handed it well, only needing a scan. But the scan didn't show any improvement to the complications. Jim had realised by now, every time Oswald went with his son to check on the worrying complications with the implant, he would spend the evening in floods of tears. It had seemed more pronounced since he had found out he was pregnant, and Jim guessed this had to be the worst time for Oz to be worrying about one of his children.

 _It was also a bad time for Oswald to decide to plan a memorial service for Ed._ Now he had discovered he was pregnant he wanted to lay the past to rest, and to create that final act of love for Edward. He planned to hold a service at the house, inviting old friends to show up to remember him. He had planned it for ten day's time, and immediately set about ordering suitable flowers and thinking about what he wanted to say in memory of his late husband. Jim quietly worried about all the strain this was having on Oz, who had only recently discovered he was pregnant. Fertility units had a very low miscarriage rate, but he still worried.

And while this was happening, Hope was seeking peace away from her little brother's tantrums and her Dad's tearful moments that made her cry too, spending three days a week at Tabby's, where she and Nessa talked about everything.

_They talked a little too much. Hope told her about her brother. Later on, when Hope had gone home, Nessa told Tabby. Tabby told Barbara. And Barbara got curious..._

 

As they sat together sharing a bottle of wine late one night while Nessa was asleep, Barbara had a look of determination in her eyes as she sat beside Tabby on the rug by the fire, with Tabby's laptop in front of her.

“ _Why_ are you so curious?” Tabby asked, sightly bemused at her intensity as she set her sights on the screen and poised her fingers above the keyboard.

“Because I want to know!” she exclaimed, “Don't you want to know, Tabby?”

She thought about it and shook her head.

“Obviously I'm not the only one who ever shared a bed with Oswald! It's his business!”

Barbara smiled playfully.

“And I like to know these things!”

She started a search. At first Tabby looked away as she poured another drink, then as Barbara found his social media account, her eyes shone with glee.

“Bingo!” she said, indicating to his picture, “Christian Elijah Cobblepot.... Oh... he's got Oswald's last name. That's no use to me... _who is his mother?_ ”

Tabby shook her head.

“You are unbelievable! Oswald wanted to keep this quiet.”

“But why?” Barbara said, and then she began to scroll down, reading all the public posts she could find.

“Oh...” her expression changed as she saw pictures from a funeral, then a sea of flowers, and his emotional message: _RIP Clara, see you some day on the other side. I'll love you forever._

“Oh that's so sad, his girlfriend died... recently, too.”

“Get off his Facebook!” Tabby said sharply.

“Wait...” Barbara began to search for his details. Then her expression changed as she stared at the screen.

“Mother is... Bridgit Pike, of Pike Cosmetics... _Firefly? He was fucking his enforcer?”_

Barbara reached for the wine, skipping the glass and swigging from the bottle as anger filled her eyes.

“That's disgusting! She was what, twenty years old? He was much older than her, I would _never_ have an age gap relationship!”

Tabby stared at her as Barbara chugged on the wine again.

“Have you finished being so judgemental? I wasn't expecting that either, but she did used to work for him. And Bridgit was never short of boyfriends – and Oswald was always on his own, for all we know she could have been his first love!”

Barbara took another drink and set the bottle down heavily.

“He's had _you_ , he's had _Firefly_...How could he go for _her_ , she's covered in scars!”

Tabby's mouth briefly dropped open as Barbara didn't have to say anything to explain herself – the booze had just done it for her.

“You're jealous!”

Barbara stared back at her, as her face flushed as a brief flash of guilt came to her eyes.

“I have _never_ been attracted to Penguin! I've _never_ even _thought_ about fucking him _or_ sucking his cock!”

Again, the booze had spoken for her... Tabby smiled as she looked away and shook her head.

“I haven't!” Barbara protested drunkenly, “Not once, not in all the years I've know him, I've _never_ masturbated over him!”

Tabby started to laugh.

“Oh my god, you _do_ want Oswald! Is that why, when ever we talk about me and him and those weeks we spent together, you say _fifty shades of Oswald_ like you really enjoy the thought of him being dominant? You asked me for every single detail, Barbara, I remember!”

“ _No, I didn't!”_ she insisted.

“Yes you did!” Tabby giggled, “You said, _How big is his cock, Tabby? What's he like when he comes, Tabby?_ ”

Barbara's face flushed furiously.

“Well it doesn't matter now. You've had him, Firefly's had him, _and_ carried his kid... you've got a kid by Ed Nygma, now my ex Jim is with Oswald and _they're_ having a _second_ kid together...”

Tabby had stopped laughing. All amusement faded from her eyes as she suddenly realised something else, and it made her heart ache for Barbara, who had always put her career first and never wanted a family...

“You've changed your mind, you want a baby?”

Sadness shaded her gaze. Even the effect of the booze couldn't hide the truth, it was only amplifying it now.

“I just woke up one day and realised something was missing from my life,” she said sadly, “And it's too late to think about it now, because I'm on my own and my options are very limited. Everyone I know has their family complete now. I'm the one who left it too late.”

“It's not too late!”

Tabby reached for her, hugging her tightly as her heart ached for Barbara, who had been hiding her secret wish for a child because she was all alone. Barbara was thankful of her closeness as she clung to her, feeling ridiculous as she wept tears for a child that didn't even exist as she felt like she had just realised her biggest ambition a little too late in life to make it happen...

 

Ed Nygma had no clue the man he loved was struggling to cope with their young son and his tantrums, or that he had an older son come into his life who was facing the prospect of a high risk pregnancy. Nor did he know the man he loved was sadly planning for his memorial service. He just knew, as he sat in a chair by the window in his hospital room, that pieces of his life were sliding about inside his head, and they felt heavy and he swore if he shook his head too hard, he could hear them clattering about. He could see people and places but no names:

There was his husband, that handsome little guy who walked with a limp. And there were kids in their house too - did they have a family? A little boy who often wore a question mark t shirt, he had screamed the supermarket down having a tantrum... was that boy his kid? And there was an older girl, a teenager... dark hair like his husband, same kind of look about her eyes... she felt like she was _sort of_ his. Maybe not biologically. _But..._

He had held her in his arms cradling her while his husband was recovering from... _What had happened?_ Something about her birth going wrong... But he had known there was hope. And he had named her...

_Hope!_

The name slid into place. _His stepdaughter was called Hope_. Ed looked back at the open doorway as a nurse walked past.

“Hey!” he said urgently, “Get in here quickly, give me some paper...I need to write something down... I'm remembering!”

She handed him a notepad and a pen, looking at him intently.  
“Can you remember your name?” she asked.

“No, but I have a stepdaughter called Hope.... there's more...”

Ed ran his fingers through his hair, his head spinning with impatience as he tried to search through fog.

“Wait....I have something!”  
He drew it on the pad. He showed it to her.

“I know this makes sense some how! What does it mean?”

She looked at it and shook her head. Ed gave a sigh, looking down at what he had drawn:

 _It_ _meant something to him, and he was sure if he looked at it long enough, more would come to him. It was a question mark..._

That fog was lifting. There was name in his heart and as he spoke it, his heart ached.

“ _Oswald!”_ he yelled, _“Oswald is my husband....”_ tears filled his eyes as in his mind's eye he saw Oswald looking at him as he smiled and said, _“I love you Edward...”_

He gave a gasp as a tear ran down his face.

“ _My name is Edward Nygma!”_

 

Oswald's phone was on silent as it rang in his pocket, because his jacket was on the floor along with the rest of his clothing as he and Jim made the most of Jim's day off and the fact that Hope was at school and Tabby had taken Eddie to the park. Making the most of their time for Jim had meant surprising Oswald with a new toy. _A sex toy he had never seen before_... As he had showed him the short string of rounded beads that started off small and increased in size, Oswald had looked at it curiously and said “Where the hell are they supposed to go?”

Jim had smiled and said “Let me show you, Oswald!”

Now they were both naked on the bed, Oswald was on his knees and Jim was behind him, one hand was around his waist as the other shifted down to the rounded grip on the end of the beads. He had pushed them one at a time into his ass, watching his startled expression, and now as he urged him to jerk his cock harder, Oswald started to shake.

“ _I'm coming!”_ he gasped.

Jim kept his arm around him as Oswald leaned hard against him, panting and shaking as he neared his peak.

“ _Let me see you come,”_ Jim whispered in his ear, _“Do it Oz!”_

Oswald gave a gasp and as he started to lose control, Jim tugged gently on the handle of the string, sliding the beads out one at a time as Oswald's climax throbbed and he gave short, loud gasps and yelled _Jim_ , then as he removed the toy, Oswald's body sagged and Jim caught him, turning him around and pushing his cock into his mouth.

“ _Suck it Oswald!”_ he commanded, breathing out hard as he looked down at the sight of him taking his cock deep into his mouth. He came hard and fast, making him suck and swallow quickly. Then Oswald finally lay back, exhausted as Jim joined him and kissed him hard, and as he pulled back, he looked into his eyes.

“ _I love you so fucking much!”_ Jim said as his voice trembled, _“You're all mine, Oz.”_

“I wouldn't want to be anywhere else!” Oswald said with a smile as he recovered his breath. Jim kissed him again and pulled him closer. _And Oswald's phone rang again in his pocket, and neither man heard it..._

 

Later that afternoon, after Jim and Oswald had got dressed and the kids had returned and Christian had finally got up after resting in his room all day feeling exhausted and heavy, the family spent some time together in the front room, then Eddie had said he wanted to play outside and Jim had smiled as he watched Oswald wrap his little boy in a warm coat. Then Oz had put on his own coat, it was long, flowing and dark purple with a thick fur collar and to Jim, Oswald looked simply beautiful as he went outside with the wind catching the coat and making his spiked hair mess up as leaves twisted to the ground and he stood there watching as Eddie ran about, catching leaves as they fell from the trees.

Jim was in the kitchen, he turned from the window and began to make some tea for Oswald. Christian came out to join him and paused to lean against the table as he breathed heavily.

Jim turned and looked at him with a concerned expression.

“Are you okay, Chris?”

“It's just my back,” he said, “It's very stiff today.”

Jim pulled out a chair and helped him to sit, guessing he would have to get used to this because in a few months, Oswald would be struggling too as he got bigger – probably more than Chris, who was simply feeling the strain of being heavily pregnant – Oz had a damaged leg to live with, too...

 

Oswald had not checked his phone, but he felt it vibrate in his pocket. As Eddie ran around the garden then jumped on the swing, he leaned on his cane and walked over to him, giving him a gentle push as he took out his phone and looked at the number – he did not recognise it.

“Hello, Oswald Nygma speaking,” he said.

_Then he listened._

Eddie frowned as his swing stopped moving.

“Daddy push me!” he said, glancing to the side of him as he saw his Daddy's shadow cast by the weak October sun, his long coat flapping in the breeze as he stood there.

“Daddy?”

Oswald stammered a few words into the phone, then he gave a sob.

“ _Yes, yes of course I will! Oh my god it's a miracle! Edward!”_

“Daddy?” Eddie said again, just then he heard him give a hard sob and his Daddy's shadow crumpled and he jumped off the swing looking on in alarm to see Oswald knelt there on the damp lawn, hunched over as he wrapped his arms about his sides, his dropped phone in front of him as he sobbed hard.

 

In the kitchen, Jim was making the tea. Christian had seen his father take a call and then fall to his knees and he got up sharply.

“Dad's collapsed!”

Jim turned quickly to the window, his first thought being the baby as he told Chris to sit down, then he ran outside to find Oswald on his knees sobbing as Eddie looked on in confusion.

“Oz, are you okay? Is it the baby?” he asked as he leaned over him and placed a hand on his shoulder. Oswald looked up at him with determination burning in his eyes as he grabbed his phone, shoved it in his pocket, then he snatched up his cane and grabbed at Jim as he pulled himself to his feet and dragged in a breath.

“ _I just got a call from a hospital out of town... it's almost a hundred miles from here!”_

Jim looked back at him in confusion. What Oswald said next sent his hopes and dreams crashing down.

“ _Ed's alive!”_ he said as tears of joy shone in his gaze, _“My Edward is alive, Jim! He was found slumped at the wheel of a stolen car... he's been unconscious for months, then he had trouble with his memory... it's just come back to him, he said his name is Edward Nygma! We have to go and see him right now, I want my Edward home!”_

Oswald hugged him tightly again, sobbing tears of relief as Jim blinked away tears of his own as he realised what this could mean... _Of course Oz would want Ed back. He couldn't see any other way now..._

 

Hope had cried with joy. Chris had been stunned but happy for his father. A lot of hugging had gone on before Jim had got into the car with Oswald and started the long drive to reach Ed.

The first thirty minutes after they left the house had seen Oswald on the phone to the hospital, demanding to speak to his husband. Jim had kept his eyes on the road, saying nothing as he listened.

“ _Edward!”_ he had said tearfully, _“Oh my love, I'm so thankful you are alive! It's been terrible, we all thought you were dead! I love you so much!”_

“I love you too, take me home!” Ed pleaded.

“We're on our way now!” Oswald had replied, then he had been briefly annoyed that their call had been cut short because Ed's doctor wanted to speak to him, and Jim heard Oswald say after a brief pause, _“Well clearly his memory is back enough to recall who he is, the rest is a minor detail! I am on my way to bring my husband home! And you should have tried harder to trace his family months ago!”_

Eventually the call had ended and Jim stayed silent, not wanting to think what this meant for the future. Right now, all that mattered was reaching Ed, after that, he didn't know what to expect. Then Oswald spoke up as he wiped more tears from his eyes.

“I love you, Jim. And I know this changes everything, I'm _not_ saying it ends us but it _does_ change things. I'm thankful Ed is alive, can you understand that?”

Jim nodded, swallowing hard as he tried to fight off the urge to weep, because he was driving and needed to watch the road ahead. Oswald paused again, recalling all that had been said.

“The doctor said he's physically recovered. The only reason he was still there was because he had no where else to go and his memory was slow to return...” he glanced at Jim, “They also said he had a serious head injury when he first arrived. He's a lot better now but he has some lasting damage. It doesn't sound too serious ... they said he might be forgetful, he could get moments of confusion. They wanted him to stay a little longer for a better assessment before he leaves but he insists on coming home....” his voice became tearful again, _“And I want my Edward back, I want him back today, in my arms, I'm taking him home!”_

Jim briefly glanced at him giving his hand a squeeze.

“Okay, he's coming home, we know that. What are you going to say about the baby? Everyone knows, Oswald. It's better coming from you or from me -”

“I will tell him once he's home where he belongs!” Oswald said sharply, casting him the kind of frosty glance that would not have been out of place years before when he had been Penguin and they had been on opposite sides of the law, “I realise it would have been better for _you_ if Edward had stayed conveniently dead, but my husband is _alive!_ ”

Jim blinked away more tears. Oz was emotional, the situation was overwhelming him, and he was pregnant. He didn't want to make his stress levels worse by quarrelling.

“Let's just get Ed back home,” Jim said quietly, “I'll leave you and him to talk and then I'll go home and we can figure this out another time. Ed is priority.”

“Agreed,” Oswald said, and he looked down at his wedding band as more tears came to his eyes, then he placed his hand below his ribcage as he thought of Jim's baby growing inside him.

“We will figure something out, Jim,” he assured him, “Just not today...”

_Not today._ Jim wanted to understand, but it still cut deep as a knife. Ever since the crash his heart had ached for Oswald and his devastating loss, he had seen what grief had done to him...If the power had existed to alter the situation, to use the power of life or death to make a choice,  _of course_ he would have wiped out the events that led to the accident, anything to see Edward alive and with Oswald, and his Oz not suffering heartbreak and grief...

_Love wasn't selfish, not real love. Here he was, driving Oswald a hundred miles to find Ed. After all their hopes and dreams had just cracked down the middle, irreparably damaged forever more. Nothing could be the same again, but no matter what happened, it wouldn't kill his love for Oz..._

 

It was growing dark when they arrived at their destination. Oswald looked tired and emotional and somewhere between wanting sob and lashing out at anyone who got in his way. Talking to the doctors was difficult. He barely listened, insisting on seeing Ed. He also insisted Ed was coming home today, right now, or he would use his money and his lawyers and there would be hell to pay. Jim tried to be polite, listening on his behalf as Oswald was finally taken to the room where Ed had spent the past few months recovering.

As the door opened, Oswald pushed past the nurse and looked to the man who sat in a chair with his back to the door, looking out at the darkening skies.

“ _Edward!”_

Now his memory had returned, all Ed had wanted was hear his voice. He turned sharply as tears filled his eyes, and rose from his seat in time for Oswald to limp quickly over to him and then collide with him as they embraced tightly, Oswald's legs shook and suddenly he was on his knees again and Ed was kneeling with him. Oswald was sobbing and saying _Ed_ over and over.

By the time Jim walked into the room, the two men were weeping together, pausing to touch each others face, Ed stroked his hair, Oswald kissed him once, and then kissed him again.

“ _Oh Ed, I thought I'd lost you!”_ he wept, “I will _never_ leave your side again, never!”

Then he looked sharply to Jim, as fresh tears still shone on his face.

“Did you bring Edward's clothing?”

Jim placed a bag on the bed as he nodded.

Oswald struggled to get up. Ed was up before him, handing him his cane, then pausing to embrace him again.

“I tried so hard to recall my name!” Ed told him as he looked tearfully at Oz, “It was like being lost in a fog. Then I recalled Hope! After that, it all came back to me!”

As he started to smile, so did Oswald.

“Hope? You recalled my daughter first?”

“And then the other children... Eddie, Nessa.... but mostly it was you, I kept seeing your face, Oswald!”

As they stood together, embracing like they were afraid to let go and the dream would evaporate, Jim turned away, hiding the tears that stung his eyes as he waited outside in the corridor. He closed his hand into a fist, discreetly punching a wall as he leaned against it, doing it hard enough to feel the pain because he needed it to keep his head together:

_Him and Oz had a baby on the way. They had started making their plans. Everyone knew they had made plans to build a future together. What the hell would happen when Oswald told Ed about that?_

He didn't get the chance to ask, because Oswald stayed with Ed until he was dressed and ready to leave. Then they visited the doctor together to pick up Ed's medication, and finally, they left the hospital together. It would be a long drive back. They would be lucky if they got home before three am. Jim was tired, but he could handle the drive if they made a couple of stops along the way. He suggested finding a hotel for the night. Oswald said no. So when they got into the back of the car and silently embraced and stayed in an embrace, Jim got in the driver's seat and began the long drive back.  _Anything for Oz, even now, anything to make him happy..._

 

It was three thirty in the morning when they arrived back at the mansion. Oswald asked him to come in. Jim said no, he would go home and grab some rest. He would not be going to work in the morning, not after the long journey. He said he would call him soon, and then he had waited for Oswald to quietly opened up the door of the mansion, and as he and Ed went inside and shut the door behind them, he drove away, wanting his apartment, his bed, and to sleep, alone - where he wouldn't be tormented by thoughts of the mess the future would be, at least while he slept those thoughts would not torment him...

 

Oswald had quietly taken Ed upstairs to their bedroom. Jim's stuff was still there, but neatly put away at the back of the wardrobe, so he knew Ed would not see it. He also knew he would have to explain, but not yet. Everything could wait until morning.

Oswald pulled Ed down on top of the covers and they lay together still fully clothed, shifting into a close embrace as Oswald placed his head on his chest, listening to the sound of Ed's beating heart.

“Should we wake everyone and let them know I'm back? I want to see the kids,” Ed whispered, “I've missed everyone _so_ much!” as his voice became tearful, Oswald held him tighter.

“No,” he said softly as he closed his eyes, hearing the sound of his heartbeat, “Not until morning. Just lay here with me, don't move, don't speak, Ed. Just hold me...”

Ed held on to him, and then slept deeply, comforted by the scent and familiarity of home, and most of all, the closeness of Oswald in his arms.

 

Next morning, Oswald woke first, as he shifted his stiff leg and realised he had slept in his clothing, he gave a soft groan, wondering why he had done that – then it all came back to him. _Ed was sleeping in his arms. Ed had come home last night. Ed was still alive..._ A rush of joy and relief hit him all over again as he kissed him softly. Ed's eyes opened slowly and he smiled lazily as he gave Oswald a hug.

“Yes, I'm really here, I am alive! But I never imagined anyone would have thought I was dead! I had no concept of time for a while.”

Oswald looked at him intently as he lay in his arms, looking into his eyes. Ed knew at a glance something was wrong.

“What's the matter, Oz?”

“Do you remember Firefly?”

“Yes, why?”

“I had a brief relationship with her, long before you and I ever got started, Ed. She quit as my enforcer and left town because she was pregnant. I have a teenage son named Christian. He's staying here at the house.”

Ed's eyes widened in surprise.

“Okay, thank you for telling me... wow, that must have been a shock for you, Oz... I'm surprised, you and Firefly!”

“It was a shock to learn about my son, but a happy shock,” he replied.

Oswald didn't want to break the moment by telling him about Jim, or the baby. His eyes were wide as he continued, “Chris is heavily pregnant. He got implanted with his girlfriend's baby, she was terminal, there was no other way to save the baby. But he had the implant put in by an unqualified doctor. Lee said he's at risk, the birth could be dangerous.”

Ed gave a heavy sigh and then hugged him tightly.

“I'm here for you now. It's all going to be okay. What's his name again?”

“Christian.”

“And who is his Mom? Did you say he's Ivy Pepper's kid?”

“ _What?”_

“Someone from the old days... younger than you... pretty... Ivy or... is she Bruce's ex? Is his Mom Selina Kyle?”

Oswald stared at him. He saw the confused look in his eyes and then remembered, Ed would never be quite the same again. Blank moments, a poor memory...It was frustrating already.

“ _He's Firefly's!_ I had a love affair with Bridgit Pike while she worked as my enforcer! And she doesn't know about the baby. He hid the pregnancy before he came to stay with me.”

Ed paused for thought.

“Sorry, I forget things a lot these days... Bridgit is Christian's Mom, okay... I can hold that memory now... Christian is Bridgit's kid...” then he suddenly thought of something else, and a look of alarm came to his eyes, “Were you okay after the crash? What happened to the implant, it didn't rupture, did it?”

“It has a ten percent detachment because of the impact but I can safely carry my baby. It may just mean the chemicals that release to help with birth might be compromised. The baby will be fine. I may need a few stitches, possibly forceps. I can handle that. _You kissed that implant, remember? You put your love into the place where our baby would grow?_ ” Oswald had become tearful. He knew he had just said way too much than he had intended and now all he could do was hope Ed had not picked up on it...

Ed looked at him in confusion.

“You kept it? You thought I was dead and you _kept_ it? Why?”

“Because it was the last of our hopes and dreams Ed! Our future baby...So I kept the empty unit and -”

“ _Wait.”_

Oswald knew that tone and that look in Ed's eyes. _Oh dear lord, he had put two and two together now..._

“You said _the baby_. You got that implant on the day of the crash, I never got a chance to even touch you -” Ed pushed him away and got up sharply, standing there glaring down at him.

“What baby, Oz?” he said darkly, “Is there a kid inside you, a kid but not _MY_ kid?”

Oswald scrambled off the bed and grabbed his cane, needing it for support and possibly as a weapon too, as Ed walked around the bed, closed a hand about his jacket and pushed him up against the wall. Oswald's eyes were wide, he was shaking. Ed's eyes were blazing with rage.

“ _You thought I was dead, so instead of mourning me, you just went out like the man slut that you are and got fucked?”_

“Ed please keep your voice down, the kids are asleep! I don't want to fight with you, the baby -”

“Who's the father?”

A tear ran down his face.

“ _Jim.”_

Oswald was gripping his cane hard, ready to lash out if he really had to, but Ed just let go of his jacket and stepped back as tears filled his eyes. He knew the kids were asleep too and they didn't need to hear any of this... He drew in a slow breath and kept his voice low as he spoke again. Riddler was breaking through into his thoughts, telling him Oswald had believed he was gone, and this wasn't such a disaster, there was always a solution. Riddler was right. But Ed had come up with his own solution right away...

“You thought I was dead, so you fucked Jim.”

“ _No!”_ Oswald protested as his face paled and his eyes widened, _“It wasn't like that! Losing you almost killed me! I had to move on with my life or give up entirely, I was so lost!”_

Ed gave a heavy sigh as frustration burned in his eyes and his memory blurred again.

“What's wrong with the implant? You said there was something wrong with it?”

“It's ten percent detached. It could give me a difficult birth but there's no threat to my life.”

“Okay, okay... let me think...” Ed replied, containing his temper. He stepped closer to Oswald, then he reached out and brushed a tear from his eye.

“Here's the plan. I will forgive you and stay with you and the kids and we will be happy again, just like before.”

Hope began to spark in Oswald's eyes.

“Really, Ed?” he said tearfully, “Thank you so much, I didn't think you would be so forgiving!”

Pain still burned in Ed's eyes.

“But _if_ we are going to have a future together and _if_ there is going to be a baby, you will be having _mine_. I want you to call Lee and tell her you want the pregnancy terminated because the unit has the detachment issue. You want to be sure you're safe -”

“ _But I am safe! Lee said so!”_

“Let me finish!” Ed said coldly, “This is the deal, Oswald. We will stay together and we will have another baby – but no baby yet, not for a few months. First you have to end it with Jim and have a termination. It's not difficult, honey...”

Oswald stared at him in disbelief as Ed brushed another tear from his face then paused to briefly toy with a dark spike of hair as he looked into his eyes, _“It's like this, Oswald,”_ Ed told him, spelling it out, _“We will be just fine. Everything will be just fine. But you're not having Jim's baby, sweetheart. You are having an abortion - or you will lose me forever!”_

Ed walked out of the room. Oswald went over to the bed and sat down, set his cane aside and put his head in his hands and quietly wept. _Ed wanted him to get rid of the baby? It was unthinkable, it was his baby, him and Jim's child... How could he be so cruel?_ He tried to imagine the situation being the other way around, if he had gone missing and come back to find Ed pregnant, of course he would want to get back together with him, and he would have resorted to anything to get rid of a love rival, even now he was no longer a criminal, murder would have been a solution to keep Ed from the arms of another... his jealousy was understandable.

_But to try and force him to abort his baby?_

That was another matter entirely. If it had been the other way around, Oswald knew in a heartbeat he would take on any child of Ed's, and do it with love. _How could Ed be so cruel?_ Oswald thought of that tiny dark grain he had seen on the scan, that little spark of life that was growing inside him every day and making itself known through his tiredness and the extra food he was eating, that baby was thriving... _Ed or the baby._ He couldn't make a choice like that.. _.How the hell could he make that kind of decision? As a deep, fierce protective urge fired up inside him, he knew the answer._

He slid his hand over the fabric of his suit, resting it beneath his ribcage.

“ _It's not your fault,”_ he said tearfully, _“You are innocent. I am the one to blame... You are not Ed's child. You are MY child...”_ determination burned in his gaze as his tears stopped flowing, _“And I am NOT giving you up!”_

 

Ed's anger felt like a rising heat that threatened to ignite and engulf the entire house. He felt like his rage could have set the place on fire, his fists were curled tight and he wanted to slam a punch into Jim Gordon's face and say, _That's for fucking Oz and getting him pregnant – again! Twice, Jim, fucking twice?_ Ed stopped walking, he stood there in the middle of the upper hall and ran his fingers through his hair as he wished he could push away the fog in his head. His memory was fucked and he knew it. Little things went past him that should stay in there, like his mind had holes and information slipped through it. _But Oz and Jim fucking?_ No, _that_ wouldn't slip through one of those damned holes, _that_ was branded into his memory and there to stay, this was why life was so damned unfair...

He took in a slow breath, eyes blazing with rage as he thought about Jim in his house, taking his place. Playing with his kids, pretending to be their father. Then going upstairs and... his hands all over his Oswald!

“ _I'm going to kill that bastard!”_ he whispered in a low voice.

Suddenly a wave of emotion came over him as he thought about Oswald. _Was he crying now? Probably. He was weeping for that baby...the kid Jim put inside him as soon as the world believed Ed Nygma was dead. This was Jim's fault. Not Oz. Poor Oswald..._

“ _Oh no!”_ Ed took a sharp breath, turning back towards the closed bedroom door, _“I am so sorry!”_ he muttered as he walked back down the hallway.

 

As he opened up the door, Oswald looked up at him sharply, anger blazing in his eyes as he placed a hand below his ribcage, protecting his tiny, unborn life from the monster that wanted to kill it.

“ _This is MY baby!”_ tears streaked his face, _“Mine, Edward! I will keep this child regardless of who his father is and what you think about it! I will raise this baby alone if I have to!”_ he gave another sob and Ed felt it hit him somewhere deep inside where pain was cracking his own heart.

“No,” he said softly, walking over to the bed where Oswald sat softly weeping as he got down on his knees and took hold of his hands, “No, Oz. I'm sorry. It's not the baby's fault. Or yours. I love you, sweetheart. You and me are back together. I'll raise this kid with you. _And Jim Gordon can fuck off out of our lives, he did this to you, honey. He left you in this mess and it's not the first time he's done it!_ ”

Oswald had stopped crying. He had heard all he had said, and the forgiving tone of his words.

“But we decided this together, after I thought I'd lost you, Ed! I wanted a life to grow in that implant because you kissed it, you kissed my new womb and put your love inside it! That was all I had left of you!”

Oswald was shaking. Ed let go of his hands, then he placed a gentle grip on his arms to steady him as he looked into his eyes.

“He took advantage of you!”

Oswald's tearful gaze widened indignantly.

“ _He did not!”_ he exclaimed, struggling to keep his voice low, ever mindful that his kids were asleep and it was early morning. Now he saw a degree of forgiveness in his eyes, but it was Ed's interpretation – the only way he could bear to see it...

“Yes Oswald, you were upset and grieving and alone and he thought he'd come over and take advantage of you! I've seen the way he looks at you sometimes, a _lot_ of guys look at you like that....” he reached up and brushed a lock of hair from his eyes,”You're a pretty guy, Oz! And you're a flirt even if you don't realise it. _And it's not your fault that you got lonely and behaved like a slut._ ”

Oswald's jaw dropped.

“That's not true, Ed! I'm not a -”

Ed touched a fingertip to his lips to silence him as he carried on speaking.

“But, I will forgive you and take you back, and you will _never_ see Jim again, do you understand me?”

Oswald stared back at him.

“But he's Hope's father and this baby -”

“He can still see Hope. That's only fair. And I'm not mad about you and Selina, that was way before we got together -”

“ _Bridgit!”_

Ed chuckled.

“My memory is _SO_ screwed!” he laughed a little harder, but Oswald was not amused. Ed had changed. He was yet to understand how much, but clearly his memory was going to pose problems. He just wished he could forget about Jim...

“And I fully intend to build a good friendship with your eldest son. He sounds very brave to be going through this at such a young age... When everyone gets up, I'll be sure to say Hi to....” he gave a sigh of frustration, “What's his name again?”

“Christian. Chris. Call him Chris.”

“Okay, I will give all my support to Chris.”

“And please remember Bridgit doesn't know! If she called his phone and you picked it up -”

“My memory's not that bad!” he exclaimed, and then he smiled as his expression softened, _“I mean, I can't forget what Jim did to you.”_

“It was a mutual thing, he _wasn't_ using me!”

“You just want to believe that,” Ed replied.

Oswald took hold of his hand, placing it below his ribcage.

“Please accept this baby, Ed.”

But he drew his hand away sharply.

“That damaged implant will complicate the birth, I fully expect you will suffer when _it_ is born, the birth will be painful, you will most likely need a forceps delivery and stitches, and you _will_ be doing that alone – I am _not_ going to be there for the birth – but after that, I will forgive you and raise _it_ like one of my own children.”

Tears came to his eyes again as he realised he was far from forgiven. This was nothing to do with the after effects of his head injury – this was Ed's anger, and it was cold and vengeful and lingering...

“Will you stop saying _it!_ Hope is Jim's daughter, you love Hope! Why can't you love this baby?”

“Because I can forgive a drunken one night stand. But this time, different circumstances! As soon as I vanished, he made a move and you welcomed it and even used _our_ implant to make a kid with him! He is _out_ of our lives now. He can visit to see Hope and take her to school. But _I_ will deal with him. You will have no more contact with him, ever.”

Oswald's face had turned pale.

“And you expect me to give birth alone? I told you I'll have a rough time with this one!”

Ed's expression softened.

“That's what you get for cheating on me, Oz! But I won't leave you. We need to put our lives back together,” he smiled, and Oswald did not. Clearly, Ed's revenge was going to be prolonged and maybe real forgiveness was impossible...

Just then, there was a creak as the bedroom door swung open. Oswald saw Eddie standing in the doorway and he looked away, wiping his eyes. Eddie was staring at his Father with a look of amazement on his face.

“ _Father?”_ he exclaimed, _“You come back from heaven for Eddie?”_

Ed's heart filled with joy as he held out his arms and his son ran to him. As he hugged him, still asking if he had come back from heaven, all his anger was forgotten as he smiled as he looked into his wide, surprised eyes. It was all to complicated for such a young child to understand, so he said the only thing he could understand:

“Yes, son, I came back from heaven. I'm back forever, I came back for you, because I love you, Eddie!”

As Ed hugged their son again, Oswald sat on the edge of the bed looking on, his eyes aching from crying as he placed a hand below his ribcage and thought of the child Ed had so cruelly rejected.

 _I'm here for you,_ he said silently to his unborn baby, _Even if Ed doesn't love you or want you when you are born, I will be here for you no matter what he says or does, I will not abandon you, little one..._

Then Ed took his son by the hand and led him away, as he said he would make some breakfast. He had spoken like it was just another normal morning and he had never been away – but Oswald knew different. Ed wouldn't forgive his relationship with Jim, and the demands he was making were crazy – he fully expected him to never have contact with Jim again? He wanted him to give birth to this baby alone as some kind of punishment?

“ _How could you be so cruel?”_ Oswald whispered, then he got up and limped into the bathroom to wash his face, so he could go downstairs and smile for the kids and pretend everything was fine. But everything wasn't fine and it seemed it never would be again. Their marriage felt broken beyond repair...

 

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello :-) I'm glad this fic is being enjoyed and thanks for the kudos and comments!   
> This chapter has a WARNING: There is a rather graphic scene of childbirth.

Chapter 8

 

For the next couple of days, Ed settled back into his usual routine, spending time with Eddie and Hope. He was aware that the city had believed him to be dead, but he left making the calls and breaking the news and cancelling his memorial service to Oswald, and while he was busy doing that, Ed was struggling with his damaged memory as Eddie left the water running in the kitchen and he heard it but forgot about it - until water flooded on to the floor and Hope yelled at him because she almost slipped. Then Eddie drew his _swirly swirly_ picture on the wall and Ed had forgotten it wasn't okay to do that and he had added a big, green question mark next to it, and suddenly recalled he had better clean that off, but then Eddie asked to play outside and when Oswald saw the mess, he went angrily into the garden, only for Ed to tell him to clean it up himself. Ed slept beside Oswald every night but made no attempt to get close. He would put an arm around him and when Oz shifted closer, he simply said, _Goodnight, Oswald._ While this cold atmosphere was unending, Oswald had the press to deal with, putting on a smile as he happily announced the news that his missing husband had been found alive and was now back home.

 

Three days after Ed had returned home, Jim called the house. Oswald answered the call while the family was at the breakfast table and as soon as he said _Hello Jim_ , all conversation stopped. Oswald's face flushed as he felt Ed's eyes burning into him accusingly from the other side of the table. Oswald put the phone down on the table and switched it to loudspeaker, then shot Ed a furious glance. _If he wanted proof he was no longer seeing Jim, he would get it... in front of the whole family..._

“Hi Oswald, I hope everything is okay. Have you spoken to Ed yet, about the situation with us?”

Hope left her breakfast and got up from the table.

“Come on, Eddie,” she said to her baby brother, and as he protested he wasn't done yet, she snatched up his drink, “You can take your juice with you, come and watch TV.”

Chris was looking in horror from Ed to his Dad, wondering what the hell would unfold now this conversation was audible.

“Maybe I should leave the room -”

“No, it's okay, Chris,” Ed said, forcing a smile, “This is just your Dad being dramatic and seeking attention.”

“I'm doing this to prove to _you_ there's nothing going on now!” Oswald snapped, then Jim spoke up again.

“Is this a bad time?”

“No,” Oswald replied, “I have told Ed everything. Understandably he is very upset. We are trying to repair our marriage.”

There was a pause. Jim's voice trembled as he spoke again.

“I was expecting that, so you should... What... what about the baby? And I need to know I can still see my daughter.”

“Of course you can,” Oswald replied, “Right now, it's a bit difficult. But Ed will let you know when you can take Hope to school, and you can still see her at weekends. It's early to be making plans for the baby. But you will be allowed access, of course. I shall leave those arrangements to my husband.”

Ed reached over and slid the phone to his side of the table. Oswald looked downwards as he closed his eyes, silently, desperately hoping that Ed wasn't about to unleash absolute rage.

“Hello Jim,” he said coldly, “Ed here! Thanks for _looking after Oz_ while I was away -”

“We thought you were dead, it's not how it seems, we didn't plan for any of this!” Jim said firmly, “You have no idea how lost Oz was without you. _If you take this out on him, if you lay a hand on him -”_

“I wouldn't hurt my pregnant husband,” Ed replied, “I love him, even though the kid's not mine. I blame you for this, I _don't_ blame Oswald. But if you _ever_ try and contact him again, you will see a side of me that hasn't been around since the old days. _I think we both know what I mean. Do we understand each other?_ ”

Jim gave a sigh.

“Yes, Ed. I just hope next time we speak we can clear the air. I need to explain.”

“Later, Jim,” he said, and shut off the call and shoved the phone back across the table to Oswald.

Chris said nothing, looking from Ed to his Dad as he sat there feeling awkward. It was clear his Dad was upset and Ed wasn't ready to forgive him and he knew there was nothing he could say or do to alter this situation. Then he wondered if Ed might turn violent. He seemed to have a _lot_ of resentment simmering in his gaze. Chris knew he was too heavily pregnant to defend his Dad if Ed lashed out. He wished he had not taken that gun off him and locked it in the safe.

“I'm going upstairs, I need to lie down,” he said, placing a hand on his baby bump to support it as he got up.

“Yes, you go and rest,” Ed replied, smiling kindly as he looked at Chris with no trace of malice in his eyes. But when Chris left the room and he looked at Oswald it was back, and this time, Oswald matched it.

“I made it clear enough!” he said as he glared at Ed, and knew in that moment if he had not been pregnant this would have ended in a fight - they would have clashed over this and both ended up with bruises, or worse - but he couldn't risk it now and Ed knew it... He felt powerless, and it was frustrating.

“And what you said to Jim about repairing our marriage, that's supposed to make it all better, is it?”

Oswald looked down at the table again.

“I'm trying,” he said quietly.

Ed got up and held out his hand.

“Come on,” he said, “Let's go upstairs.”

Oswald stared at him.

“ _Now?”_

Ed smiled.

“Now, Oswald,” he confirmed.

 

As they left the room and headed for the stairs, Ed took him by the hand. Oswald's heart skipped a beat as his eyes blurred with tears and he wondered if Ed had finally forgiven him. He had spoken so gently, so full of love and persuasion. It gave him a spark of hope that _maybe_ they were about to resolve this. He wanted Ed in his arms, he wanted to kiss him, to be loved by him again. It was all he wanted, anything to end this misery... Their hands were still linked as they went into the bedroom, then Ed locked the door.

“I love you so much,” Oswald said as his voice trembled, “I thought I'd lost you, Ed. I could see no way forward in life, I had nothing left, that's why I tried to start my life again with Jim -”

“Don't mention Jim,” Ed said softly, and he led him over to the bed.

For a moment they just stood there, as Oswald looked up at him hopefully.

“Please kiss me,” he said softly, “Please, Ed.”

Ed responded by gently taking his cane from his grip and placing it against the bed, far from his reach.

“No kisses,” he said quietly, “Just keep still.”

Oswald stood there in confusion as Ed reached for his belt and unbuckled it, then he grabbed at the fabric of his pants, tugging them down along with his underwear, and as Ed started to stroke his cock, he caught his breath.

“Why don't we go to bed?”

“Be quiet,” Ed said softly, and he got on his knees, gave him a brief suck and then began to jerk him hard.

“Slow down!” Oswald protested.

“No, this is _exactly_ what you need,” Ed replied, moving his grip roughly and firmly as Oswald grew harder and his legs started to shake.

“Ed, I want to make it last -”

“ _Shh...”_ Ed replied, and jerked him even more brutally, _“This is what you need, Oz...”_

Oswald gave a gasp as Ed's rough handling took him to the edge. Ed reached into his pocket and took out a handkerchief, then jerked him again and closed the fabric around the hot spurts of come. He paused to fold the material and wipe away a trace of wetness from his thigh, then he got up and looked into Oswald's eyes.

“I think if I _relieve_ a you two or three times a day it should keep those urges of yours under control. It should be enough to stop you cheating on me again. Get dressed, Oswald.”

Then he went to the door, unlocked it and left the room. Oswald grabbed at his clothing, quickly tidying it. As he buckled his belt, tears stung at his eyes. _Was this Ed's new idea of closeness? Coldly forcing him to orgasm, just because he thought that was what he needed to stop him cheating?_ _He hadn't cheated on him, he had believed he was dead... It wasn't fair. He wanted to call Jim._

But as he drew his phone from his pocket, he looked at the screen and then gave a sigh and put it away again. He had lost Ed once, he knew what it was like to have him gone from his life - and to have him back still felt like a miracle, even if Ed couldn't handle what had happened in his absence. Right now life was horrible, it was miserable, but Oswald was not prepared to give up on his marriage yet, no matter how badly or coldly Ed treated him, they had invested in years together, in a partnership, in raising their children. _Too much was at stake to walk away._ They would get over this, they would mend everything, and find a way forward with Jim. At least, that was what he hoped, because he couldn't tolerate living like _this_ for much longer...

 

Oswald drove Hope to school that morning. Ed had given him a cold glare as he had put Eddie in the car too, after reminding Ed his memory was damaged, and that could make for dangerous driving.

“And you might have one of your blank moments,” he had added as he got into the car and closed the door, setting a barrier between him and Ed, and feeling safer for it as he thought about his unborn child and the risk that Ed might lash out, “I'll take Hope to school and drop Eddie off at Tabby's for the morning and then I'll come straight home.”

“Yes you will,” Ed replied, “I estimate you should be no more than forty minutes, allowing for traffic.”

Oswald looked up and forced a smile.

“I love you Ed. And I am coming straight home – to you!”

Then he drove away and headed for the open gates.

“What's the matter with you and Uncle Ed?” Hope asked as they drove towards the highway.

“He has a lot to forgive,” Oswald replied, keeping his gaze fixed on the road.

“But he doesn't have to forgive anything Daddy, you thought he was dead!” Hope exclaimed, “Why is he looking at you like you've cheated on him? Can't he get his damaged brain around the circumstances?”

Oswald glanced at his daughter.

“Maybe he can't, Hope! Just remember he's still your Uncle Ed and he loves you very much. He won't be mad at Jim forever, and he _will_ forgive me eventually.”

“What if he doesn't?” she demanded, “Daddy, I'm not going to sit back and watch him treat you like shit! You don't deserve that and he should know better!”

“He will forgive me!” Oswald insisted, silently wishing his eldest daughter had not picked up on so much that he had tried to hide, “And stop using foul language, Hope!”

“ _He does treat you like shit. I've heard the way he talks to you!”_

Anger burned in Hope's eyes, like blue arctic fire, the same shade as her birth father as he looked back at her with sadness.

“We used to be so happy,” she added, “I just want everything to be like it used to be! I want my Uncle Ed to love you and appreciate you again! And I want him to _stop_ being mean to my Father! He hasn't done anything wrong, you both thought Uncle Ed died in the accident, you didn't know he was alive. Does Ed expect the world to stop turning the second he drops off the edge of it for a while?”

They turned off the highway and headed towards the road that led to the school.

“Hope,” said Oswald, “You must leave this matter alone. It is between Edward and I -”

“And if he starts abusing my pregnant Daddy, it _IS_ my business!” she said sharply, “I won't let him hurt you!”

Hope was almost fifteen and very much like Oswald, she had the fire he used to have – the fire he certainly lacked in a situation that could turn volatile and he could not fight back because he had a baby inside him to think about...

“Please leave it alone,” Oswald said as he stopped the car outside the school, “I don't want to make this situation worse. I have the baby to think about. And I love Edward, he just needs time to adjust. I'm sure in time it will all work out for the best.”

Hope paused to hug him.

“I hope you're right, Daddy,” she replied, “Because as much as I love him too I _won't_ let him treat you badly!” and then she got out of the car.

After leaving Hope at school, Oswald took Eddie over to Tabby's, and she was thrilled to see him as she hugged him and said how wonderful it was that Ed had turned up alive. Then she asked how it affected the situation with Jim.

“ _Obviously Edward and I are back together,”_ he had replied, _“And Jim and I are still on speaking terms. But it will take a while to adjust,”_ then he had made an excuse about needing to get home to Ed and driven off, heading back toward the route that led to home as he checked the time, not wanting Ed to get paranoid if he was as much as five minutes later than expected. But as he hit the highway, the traffic was heavy. He resisted the urge to call home. He was going to be late and Ed would have to deal with it...

 

Ed had only checked the time once. He knew Oswald wasn't secretly seeing Jim, and he hated himself for the way he was treating him. He wanted to wrap his arms around him and hold him close and cry and apologise for everything, even the accident, the things that were beyond his control... But that thought of Oswald and Jim together made his anger rise, and once he thought it, he couldn't push it aside. He had resented a lot since the accident, the damage to his memory, the fact that he couldn't drive any more because there was a risk he could go blank and forget where he was, then there was this _thing_ about Oswald not wanting to leave him too long with Eddie, ever since the incident with the kitchen getting flooded because Eddie had turned on the tap and he had forgotten to turn it off, and of course, the crayon scribbles on the wall - that was another issue that had not gone unnoticed. He felt useless, and knew the accident was to blame. He forgot names and got disoriented sometimes. It got in the way of the life he used to have. He wondered if Oswald would be better off with Jim, but that thought had sent his anger surging back up to new heights. Now there was a slight crack in the wall upstairs in the hallway, where his fist had connected with old plaster...

 

Chris had been resting on his bed, feeling tired and aching all over. He had slept for a short while after breakfast, but now he was awake, he had been woken sharply by a stabbing pain in his side that made him feel cold and want to throw up at the same time. He leaned over the side of the bed and gagged, then he realised the mattress was wet and threw back the covers, breathing hard as more pain cut through him and looked in horror at the wetness that stained the sheets and his clothing. His hands shook as he unbuttoned his jeans and struggled out of them, then he laid back, raising his hands to the pillow as he clutched at it, fighting another wave of pain that cut through his side below his ribcage and flickered downward.

“ _Oh shit no...”_ he gasped, arching his back as he tried to escape the pain and it hit him again, then he closed his eyes, panting as heat spread through his body as if fire had shot through his blood. _This was it. the baby was coming, and he was terrified..._

He remembered something he had read about breathing techniques and tried to breathe through the pain, but his heart was racing in panic. He didn't want to be doing this, he had never wanted to do this, but at time time, it had been the only way to save his unborn daughter. Now he was scared of dying as waves of pain rippled down his side, going deeper and lower into his body. He looked to his closed bedroom door. He knew he couldn't wait any longer, he needed help.

“ _DAD!”_ he screamed in panic.

The door suddenly opened. It wasn't his Dad. Ed was standing there.

“ _Help me!”_ Chris gasped as he turned on his side and clutched at his baby bump and yelled into the pillow.

Ed stood there for a split second, just staring at him. Chris was laying on his bed, the covers back, in just a t shirt and underwear. The bed was soaked, his underwear was soaked, there was a pink tinge to what should be transparent pre birthing fluid showing up against the white sheets. Chris was bathed in sweat, his hair was soaked with it, he was breathing hard and by the way he was screaming, his contractions were coming rapidly... Ed silently cursed his damaged mind for moving so slowly as he assessed the situation... He had learned much since he had offered to carry the next baby after Eddie was born: _Chris was having a rapid labour. That implant had dropped considerably in a very short space of time. There was blood in the prebirthing fluid. He had an internal bleed..._

“Oh dear!” he exclaimed, and rushed into the room and sat on the edge of the bed, keeping a hand on his shoulder, preventing Chris from turning on to his back.

“ _It fucking hurts!”_ wailed Oswald's son as tears streaked his face and he yelled into the pillow again.

“Yes, it does, you're in labour,” Ed replied, “Do _not_ turn on your back, the unit has detached rapidly and if it drops too sharply you will damage your lower spine if you're in the wrong position. Keep _off_ your back!”

Chris gave a whimper of pain as he felt another flicker travel downward, as he stayed on his side, panting and shaking. Ed grabbed his phone from his pocket and called Oswald. The call was cut off, and then a call came through – it was Oswald responding, making a video call. Ed answered it. Oswald was in his car, and he glared into the phone.

“I am going to be late, the traffic is held up and before you get paranoid, _no_ , it's not down to _me_ , I'm _not_ on my back on the hood of the car inviting half the city to _fuck me!_ ” he said angrily, “And I do _not_ know where Jim is - he's probably at work! Look, Ed, _look_ at the traffic!” he paused to stick the phone out of the open window, turning it left and right to prove he was stuck in a tailback, then he looked into the camera again.

“So you _can_ trust me! Did you see the traffic, did it get through to you that I'm late because -”

“ _Chris is in labour!”_

Oswald's expression changed to one of alarm.

“Are you sure?”

“He's having contractions, there's blood in the prebirthing fluid and there's not much time. I'll have to drive him to the hospital right now, I'll see you there.”

“But Ed, you can't drive any more -”

The call ended.

Oswald felt a surge of panic as he thumped the wheel in frustration, then sounded the car horn. The traffic was starting to move again, but crawling slowly.

“ _Come on!”_ he yelled at the traffic in front as impatience blazed in his eyes. This was the worst situation imaginable – Chris was in labour, he had the predicted complications and Ed was driving him to the hospital - Ed, with his damaged memory, who might get lost on the way...

 

Chris had given a cry of pain as Ed had lifted him into his arms. He carried him down the stairs and out the front door and as he sat him in the passenger seat of his Porsche, he doubled over, clutching at his baby bump as more bloodstained fluid ran from his body. Now he saw it was darker with much more blood mixed in and he leaned back sharply in the seat, gasping and shaking and sweating as Ed put on his seat belt then turned the key in the ignition.

“Chris...”

“ _What?”_ he said breathlessly as he turned his head.

“The main route is choked with traffic. I have to take a short cut through the back roads, it's right, left, two more rights and then a left, can you remember that?”

“ _Probably not...Oh fuck, this hurts! Why do I need to remember directions at a time like this?”_ he panted as fear reflected in his eyes and pain registered on his face as he fought another wave of pain.

“Because I might forget,” Ed replied honestly, then the engine fired into life and he sped towards the gates, hoping the fog would hold off from his memory long enough to reach their destination.

 

By the time Oswald reached the hospital, Ed had called him again. Chris was yelling in the background as Ed told him he was up on the second floor, then as he got out of the car, Ed passed the phone briefly to Lee.

“Oswald, are you here yet?”

“Yes I am,” he said, hurrying towards the entrance as he leaned hard on his cane, “Is Chris okay?”

“He's in the final stages of labour and the baby is doing fine so far, but he had an internal bleed and I think it might worsen after the birth... it depends how his body copes with the strain of the birthing process.”

“Okay, I'm here, I'm just about to come up now,” Oswald said, and he cut off the call as he reached the elevator. The doors slid open and he got inside, pushing the button for the second floor.

The short climb felt too slow, as he thought of Chris and he worried deeply for his eldest son. Then the doors opened and he got out and saw Ed in the corridor a short distance away. As he hurried to meet him, Chris gave a yell that carried from an open doorway.

“I got him here as fast as I could. I didn't lose my way. I didn't forget the route. I may have scratched his car turning a tight corner, there were trees and I was panicked and... I'll apologise to him later.”

Oswald closed his hand over Ed's arm as he looked up at him.

“Ed, you did great. Thank you _so_ much for helping my son!”

Oswald's gratitude reached all the way into his heart in that moment, as Ed felt his anger melt away, and he wanted to tell him he loved him, but he didn't, and in that moment of hesitation, Oswald was already gone, hurrying into the room where Chris was on his side and crying out in pain. Ed took a deep breath and went back inside, keeping a distance now because all Chris had done was scream for his Dad. Now he was here, as Oswald grasped his hand his son started to cry as he said he was scared, Ed knew the only support he needed was his father. Chris was gasping for breath as he clung to Oswald's hand.

“ _Help me! Get this thing out of me!”_ he screamed, and he clutched his hand so hard Oswald's fingers turned bloodless white.

Oswald had seen at a glance that something was very wrong, blood and birthing fluid was streaking his thighs, he was running with sweat that soaked his t shirt and shaking hard as he tried again to suck on gas and air then shoved it aside, his body tensing as he screamed again.

“He needs something stronger for the pain!” Oswald looked sharply at Lee as she checked Chris again and withdrew a bloodstained glove.

“It's too late for that, he's almost there...the unit dropped way too fast, we can limit the damage if he delivers the baby quickly, I hope...Chris, can you get up on your knees? Your Dad can help you.”

“ _NO!”_ he screamed.

Oswald laid his cane aside and reached for his son, pulling him upwards as Chris wrapped his arms around his neck and pressed his face into his suit and screamed again. He was clinging to him, panting and shaking and weak in his arms, he could barely stay up on his knees.

“You can do this,” Lee said, “Push really hard, Chris.”

Ed was glad he was standing at a distance, lingering back in the corner of the room as Oswald clung to his son and encouraged him to push. Chris cried out, then screamed and almost collapsed, as fluid gushed on to the table along with streaks of blood. Oswald was holding him up as he bled on to the table, and Lee struggled to take a grip on the baby's head as it began to emerge.

“Short breaths now, you need to stretch, Chris...don't push until I tell you.”

He used all of his strength to cling to his Dad as he pressed his face against his shoulder and the lower half of his body felt on fire. Another wave of pain cut through him.

“No, I have to push...get it _out_ of me!” he gasped, and pushed again.

Lee had just pressed the button on the wall to call for assistance as he yelled again and the sound was muffled as he pressed his face against Oswald's jacket, leaning on him so hard he swayed and struggled to keep his balance on his damaged leg. That was when Ed stepped in, standing beside Oswald as he helped to steady Chris, who was ready to collapse as more blood ran down his shaking legs.

“One more time, Chris, just one more and it's over,” Lee said said to him.

Chris raised his head, closing his eyes as he rested his head on his Dad's shoulder and gasped for air.

“ _I can't do it...let me die!”_

“No, you have to do this!” Oswald urged, holding him tightly as he stroked his hair “Push hard.”

“Just get it over with, Chris,” Ed added, “You can do it.”

Chris clung tighter to his Dad and pulled up every last fragment of his strength, giving a final push that sent a wave of pain cutting through his body as he gave a sharp cry. As Lee delivered the baby, Lauren was covered in birthing fluid and streaks of her father's blood, but she gave a loud, healthy cry and the sound of it made Chris breathe a deeply relieved sigh as all the pain flooded away.

“ _I did it!”_ he said weakly, and then he laughed as joy shone in his eyes, _“I saved her, I saved Lauren!”_

By now other medical staff were present and Lee cut the cord and handed the baby to a nurse, then she and Oswald helped Chris to lay down on his back. He was still recovering his breath, he was weak and exhausted, his face was flushed, his hair was soaked and he was still bleeding as Lee parted his legs to examine him.

“You need to push one time, I can feel the implant, it needs to discharge,”she told him.

“No, I'm too tired!”

Pain registered on his face as a cramp shot dull through his insides, and he tensed, pushing again as she felt the smooth jelly-like substance of the implant and gently drew it out of his body. He breathed out sharply, feeling a stinging pain as it slid free, then he rested, closing his eyes.

“ _Please, tell me it's over!”_ he whispered.

Ed and Oswald exchanged a relieved glance.

“It's over,” Oswald told him, “And you did so well!”

Chris laughed.

“No, I didn't!” he said weakly as he looked up at his Dad, “And I am _never, ever_ doing this again!”

“You don't have to,” Ed assured him, “Your daughter is here now. She's just fine and so are you.”

As Lee handed Lauren to Chris, tears of joy came to his eyes.

“She's so beautiful!” he wept, “She looks like my Clara!”

Then as he cradled his new born daughter he felt a sting of regret as he looked up at Oswald.

“Me and Clara, we didn't always get on, I cheated on her a few times... I didn't appreciate her, she was my first love but she wasn't really my type of woman and I never treated her the way I should have and now it's too late -”

“Don't think about regrets,” Oswald said softly, “You loved her enough to bring this child into the world and she would have been so proud of you.”

“Thanks Dad,” he said as a tear ran down his face, then he looked into his daughter's eyes and smiled.

“I love you so much,” he said softly, “Daddy's going to love and protect you forever.”

“I think she looks like Bridget, she's got her smile,” Oswald said quietly.

“Oh yes, I remember, you said, her Mom is Bridget,” Ed remarked as one of his drifting memories slid back into place, and as Oswald felt him put his arm around his shoulder, he wanted to weep, not only because he was relieved the baby had arrived, but because this was the first true show of affection he had received from Ed since breaking the news about Jim and his pregnancy. It felt like the start of forgiveness... Lee had finished examining Chris, who had not even noticed as he cradled his new born daughter.

“The implantation scar is closed up and healing and the implant came out intact,” she told him, “Do you have any pain?”

“I don't think so...”Chris was distracted as he smiled down at his daughter and she looked up into his eyes.

“Can I feed her now?”

“As soon as I've scanned you, I need to check that internal bleed,” she replied.

Ed held the baby as Oswald stayed beside his son, who wasn't at all concerned now the birth was over, the pain was forgotten as he looked over at his child in Ed's arms and smiled. Lee was looking up at the screen, and so was Oswald.

“Is everything okay?” he asked.

Lee didn't answer for a moment as she studied the scan, then moved the device further up Christian's body.

“Lee?” Tension had crept into Oswald's voice.

She turned off the scanner and ignored him, speaking instead to his son.

“Christian, you have several small bleeds where internal organs have taken damage from the unit dropping too quickly. This could get a lot worse, there's a significant risk. Do you want to have the shot to stop the bleeding?”

Chris looked at his Dad.

“I'm not sure...Do I have to? I thought it was dangerous?”

“We can wait,” Lee replied, “And scan you again in thirty minutes to see if it's resolving on its own. If it is, we can give you different medication with much less risk involved that will help the healing process.”

“Let's wait,” Chris replied, “I feel okay,” then as Ed handed the baby back, he looked down at his daughter and after a nurse gave him a small bottle of formula milk, he started to feed Lauren for the first time.

“You're going to need a couple of stitches,” Lee added, “You have a small tear because you pushed too quickly, it's not serious, I can wait until you've fed your daughter.”

“Okay,” he replied, and for all the anxiety he had felt the first time he had been examined, now he wasn't at all worried about the prospect of stitches as he smiled down at his daughter and she drank deeply from the bottle as he cradled her.

As Lee left the room, Oswald turned to Ed and looked up at him.

“Thank you, Ed. You will never know how glad I am that you were here today. It means so much to me.”

Ed looked into his eyes and smiled fondly, then he leaned closer. Oswald closed his eyes, waiting for their lips to touch, but instead, Ed briefly kissed his cheek and drew back.

“As I said, I fully intend to support Chris,” he told him, “He's a very brave young man.” Then he stepped back, it was only one step but that distance he had just put between the two of them hurt as Oswald looked at him, silently pleading with him.

“I should probably go home soon,” Ed added, checking his watch, “Tabby's doing the school run, I made her aware of the situation with Chris. But I should get home and fix some dinner for Eddie and Hope.”

“I'm sure Tabby can take care of the kids,” Oswald replied, “You should stay here with us, I want you to stay.”

Chris was still feeding Lauren as he turned his head and spoke up.

“I want you both to stay.”

Oswald turned back to him and smiled down at his son and the baby in his arms.

“Of course we will.”

“I love her so much,” Chris said softly, “It's the hardest thing I've ever done but she's worth it. _Dad... Dad take the baby I don't feel right.._.”

Oswald reached for Lauren, taking her from his arms as Chris took in a sharp breath and clutched at his body, right below his ribcage.

“What's wrong?” Oswald asked anxiously.

Chris blinked as his face paled.

“ _It hurts...Dad, make it stop, it hurts...”_ he whispered.

He slumped unconscious as the last trace of living shade faded from his face. Oswald was yelling his name. Ed ran to the door and shouted for Lee. What happened next was caught in a blur of panic for Oswald, as Lee hurried back along with medical staff as he was told to step away from his son as she scanned him again, and then they prepared to rush him to the emergency room.

“He's got a serious bleed,” Lee told him, as Oswald handed the baby to a waiting nurse, “Do I give him that shot, or do I open him up? The surgery is more risky - as you know from what happened with Hope's birth, but there are also considerable risks with the medication. We don't have time to think this over.”

Oswald had looked in despair to Ed, who had put a hand on his shoulder, saying nothing as Oswald made a life or death choice for his son.

“Give him the shot,” Oswald said, “It's his best chance. I just want him to come through this.”

 

Ed sat with Oswald in a waiting area, saying nothing as Oswald looked from the clock to the blank wall as worry filled his eyes. Then he finally spoke up.

“ _I should call Bridgit. She needs to know.”_

Ed placed his hand over Oswald's, giving it a brief squeeze. To feel his touch was such comfort at this time, but he drew it away again as Oswald met his gaze.

“We don't know the outcome yet. Chris didn't want her to know until after the baby was born, then he wanted to tell her. Let's just wait for him to have the medication and stabilise, and when he's better, he can call her in a couple of days – or even in a couple of weeks, Oswald! It's up to him.”

“You're probably right. I'm just so scared for my son. He's not the kind of guy to go through childbirth. He never would have done this if not for losing Clara. He went though hell, Ed! Every moment of that birth was fear and pain for him.”

“And you were there to support him,” Ed reminded him, “I'm sure he will be just fine. Stop worrying.”

Oswald wanted to reach for his hand, but Ed was sitting there stiffly, making it clear he did not want his physical contact. Then Lee approached the waiting area and they both got up. Ed was up first, Oswald felt a nagging ache below his ribcage as he reached of his cane, and the fleeting worry passed though his mind that maybe the stress of the past few days had been bad for his baby, maybe that damage unit was detaching. No... he pushed that thought aside:  _ He wasn't having a miscarriage, he was just worrying to much, and very scared for his son... _

“Is Christian okay?” Oswald asked anxiously.

Ed had already spotted the look on her face. _ Something was wrong. _

“Lee, is my son okay?” Oswald demanded again.

“He had the shot and it stopped the bleeding,” Lee said, looking to Ed and then to Oswald as she hoped Ed would be ready to help him when the bad news hit, “But as you know there are risks associated with the procedure. Christian reacted to the medication -”

“ _No, he's not dead!”_ Oswald yelled as tears filled his eyes.

“He's not dead!” Lee said firmly, “Calm down, Oswald! You wont be able to help him if you get worked up!”

Oswald leaned hard on his cane as he blinked away tears.

“What has happened to my son?” he said in a hushed voice.

“He suffered a reaction to the medication. The drug that saved his life also caused swelling and injury to the spinal cord. It's been treated but he's currently critical and if he survives, I can't estimate what sort of recovery he will make. I can only tell you that in these cases, there is likely to be a degree of permanent damage. I'm so sorry, Oswald.”

He dragged in a breath, gave a sob and turned to Ed, who put an arm around his shoulder as Oswald pressed his face against his jacket and wept. As he cried for his son, he felt Ed give his back a gentle pat, but there was no closeness, no holding him tightly. Then he heard Ed speak to Lee.

“Can we see him as soon as Oz feels ready?”

“That would be a good idea,” Lee replied, “He's got different injuries to the kind Oswald had fifteen years ago, but he's facing the same kind of tough recovery, if he makes it. But he's young enough to fight back and he stands a good chance. If he does pull through, how well he recovers will more or less define the quality of life he has long term. I'm so sorry this has happened.”

Oswald stepped back from Ed and wiped his eyes.

“I will see my son now,” he said quietly, then he glanced at Ed, “And then I need to call Bridgit. She needs to know.”

“You stay with Chris,” Ed told him, “I'll call her. I completely understand the shock she's going to get. _I remember how I felt fifteen years ago when I got the call about you._ ”

Oswald nodded, then handed him his phone, then as he walked away with Lee, he realised what Ed had meant – yes, he  _ did _ know how Bridgit would feel, hearing the news that her son was desperately ill after having birth complications.  _ Ed had been deeply shocked when he had found out about Hope's birth. He hadn't even known he was pregnant, or that the baby was Jim's... _ He briefly wondered if Ed's remark had been made out of compassion, or if this had been another chance to stick the knife in and give it a twist, reminding him of his first infidelity with Jim all those years back. Then he didn't think about it any more as he went into the room where his son was barely clinging to life, and sat at his bedside, taking hold of his hand as he spoke quietly, reminding him that he was not alone.

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

 

Ed sat there alone in the waiting area feeling slightly guilty. He literally had a dilemma in his hands: _Oswald's phone._ This was an awful time to take advantage of access to his phone, and he needed to call Bridgit, but... _He had access to Oswald's phone..._

He checked his text messages. Then he checked his photos. Then he went online and checked his social media account, searching through his inbox. _No evidence was present that Oswald was still seeing Jim behind his back..._ He took a look at his latest posts, and saw he had changed his status from _In a relationship with Jim Gordon,_ to _Married to Edward Nygma._ Ed gave a sigh.

“He's not cheating on you...” he murmured, then he saw a recent post: _I am so thankful my Edward is alive_ , was all it said...

Ed turned his attention back to finding Bridgit's number. He paused to check Oswald's call list. _No calls to Jim since they had parted._

“Enough of this paranoia!” he muttered, and then he paused to gather his thoughts, and called Bridgit.

The phone rang briefly.

“Oswald, it's nice to hear from you!” Bridgit said warmly.

Ed took a deep breath. _This would not be easy..._

“No, Bridgit. This is Edward.”

There was a pause.

“Oh yes, Chris told me what happened! It must have been tough for you and Oswald, all those months you were missing. Are you okay now?”

“I'm fine. And...I'm sorry,” he said as emotion began to choke his voice, “But Christian is in the hospital, he's critical. There was a problem with his baby, with Christian's baby...”

She drew in a shocked breath, then anger and tearfulness came out all at once.

“ _That fucking car!”_ she exclaimed, “I knew it, I knew he would have a crash, I didn't want him driving something so powerful at his age!”

“No, Bridgit, not the car. _His baby_.”

“He calls that damned car his baby!”

“ _He was six months pregnant when he arrived here.”_

There was a shocked silence on the other end of the line.

“What the _fuck_ are you talking about?” she exclaimed, “What's wrong with my son, Ed?”

“He was implanted with Clara's unborn child before she passed away. He was seeing Clara for a couple of years. You didn't know. He wanted to tell you everything after the baby was born.”

He heard a sob on the other end of the line

“ _He was seeing her? What's this about a baby? He carried their baby?”_

“And he gave birth to a girl today, she's just fine - but he had a complication. Apparently he had the birthing unit fitted by a friend who wasn't qualified, he was desperate to save the baby, Bridgit! Today after the birth Chris had internal bleeding, and then he reacted badly to the drugs to stop it and he's very weak and we don't know if he's going to make it. But Oswald is the best person to help him through this, he went through hell when Hope was born. He can help him, I swear to you!”

Bridgit sounded tearful as she gave her reply.

“I'm away on business, I'll have to grab the first available flight. I'll be there tomorrow by mid day. Tell my son to hold on. And tell him it's okay, I'm not mad at him...tell him I love him,” she gave another sob, “And tell Oswald I know he can help him, I know what he went through with Hope.”

“I will,” he replied as he silently hoped everything she had just said would not slip through the holes in his memory. Then the call ended and he gave a heavy sigh.

_Now Ed was thinking about Hope's birth._

_He recalled being here, in this same corridor, standing there feeling as if the world had just ended as Lee had told him Oswald couldn't endure another bleed. She had said they would have to let him go if it happened again, because he was too weak to take any more. That was the day he had yelled at her and told her Oswald was not a victim and he would fight and get through this..._

_Oswald was not a victim._

_Those words resonated with him as he thought about the crash, and how devastated he had been to believe he had lost him. Oswald had thought he was all alone in the world. And he had turned to Jim because he was grieving, using that implant, the last link to his Edward, to go ahead with the plans to make another baby..._

_Because he didn't want to give up on life._

_Because he was a survivor, not a victim..._

Ed gave a sharp gasp as tears filled his eyes. He knew it now, he had got this all wrong, he had been punishing the most precious person in his life and for what, trying to carry on after unimaginable heartbreak? He got up and walked quickly towards Christian's room.

 

Oswald had been sitting in silence, lost in thoughts of Christian's childhood, the years he had missed out on. He had barely had the chance to get to know him now he was an adult, and it seemed that chance had come too late. To lose him now was unthinkable. And still that flickering, vague ache was coming and going below his ribcage. He was worried about his baby. He had been through way too much stress lately and the unit was slightly damaged, none of those facts had been lost on him – but after carrying a black market implant with Hope, he felt sure there was nothing to worry about – he was just worrying too much, it was the weight of life and its circumstances...

Ed placed a chair next to him and sat down. _Right next to him, and that was a surprise._ What happened next was even more of a surprise as Ed reached over and placed his hand gently below his ribcage. Oswald looked down at Ed's hand. It was still there, resting over the place where his unborn child was growing. Oswald slowly turned his head, not sure how to respond to his sudden gesture after so much coldness from his husband.

“I called Firefly. She was upset and it was a shock, but she will be here by mid day tomorrow. And she knows he's in the best place – and that you can help him more than anyone. And... after I called her, I was thinking about Hope's birth,” Ed said softly as his eyes glazed with tears, “And then Eddie... Baby Nygma... I don't want to call this one Baby Gordon or Baby Jim...” he started to smile as he struggled to hold back his tears, _“Little Oz.”_

That was the moment Oswald realised Ed had finally seen the reality of the situation. He had understood everything, and all trace of anger and resentment was gone. Oswald started to smile as tears of joy stung his eyes and he wondered if it was selfish to be happy for his baby and his marriage while he sat at his son's bedside, not knowing if he would live or die.

“Little Oz sounds great. I love you, Ed.”

“I love you too,” Ed whispered, and he pulled him into a tight embrace, holding on, keeping Oswald there in his arms, as if he never wanted to let go.

“ _Where's Lauren?”_

They broke off from their embrace as Oswald's face lit up in a bright smile. Chris was awake. The pale shade had left his face and as he struggled to sit up, then Ed got up and placed his hands on his shoulders, gently pushing him back down.

“Lauren is just fine, don't try to get up!” he said, “You had a reaction to the meds. It looks like the treatment to counteract it has worked. How do you feel?”

Chris gave a weary sigh.

“Like I've been hit by truck.”

“Can you move?”

Chris tried to ignore the aches and the exhaustion the filled his whole body as he cautiously moved, and then he looked to his Dad and his Uncle Ed.

“My leg feels weird... stiff, I can't move it very well.”

“Is that all?” Ed asked.

“Yes, why?”

Ed turned to Oswald and smiled.

“Oh well, worst case scenario, he's going to walk with a cane like his old man!” then he glanced at Chris, “I'd better go and find Lee and tell her you're out of danger.”

Ed got up, pausing to kiss Oswald's cheek, and this time, it was a warm, affectionate kiss as he briefly gave his shoulder a squeeze, then he left the room.

Oswald was still smiling.

“I am so relieved you are awake, son! And Edward has forgiven me.”

“So he should!” Chris exclaimed, then he tried to move his leg again and worry clouded his gaze.

“What's wrong with me?”

“You reacted to the meds that stopped the bleeding. You were initially critical, but clearly, the stuff they gave you to counteract it has worked very fast. I'm not a doctor but it sounds like you have a small amount of paralysis. Thankfully it's not as bad as it could have been.”

“And how long will it take to wear off?” asked his son.

“I don't know. It may never improve,” Oswald replied honestly, “But like Edward just said, you will probably be able to walk with a cane. I manage with a cane and it's never stopped me getting on with life.”

Chris looked worried on hearing that, but then he asked another question.

“Is there anything else I should know?”

“Yes... we called your mother, because you were critical.”

“ _Why_ did you do that? She's going to _kill_ me!”

“No, she was worried and upset - but she's not angry,” Oswald assured him.

Chris paused for thought.

“Another thing...I seem to recall on the way over here, Uncle Ed took a sharp corner and _something_ scraped the car. Is _she_ okay?”

Oswald wanted to laugh. Clearly, now the anxiety of the birth was out of the way, Chris was back to his old self. And that old self loved his car very much.

“Unfortunately the car took a scratch,” he replied.

“He did _what_ to my car?” Chris exclaimed, and Oswald looked away as he smiled. _It would take some time to get over his ordeal but yes, Chris was going to be just fine..._

 

Later that day, Bridgit received another call, this time it was from Oswald, and he was very happy to tell her the drugs used to treat the reaction had stabilised Chris. She said she was still getting on a plane, and she seemed tense and worried. Oswald tried to reassure her, but he guessed she would not be happy until she had seen her son and knew for certain he was okay. She had not mentioned Lauren. He hoped she didn't blame the baby – he could still recall Ed telling him how he had imagined Hope was some kind of monster when he had first learned of the damage done to him by the black market implant...

Then Ed had tapped Oswald's arm and indicated to his watch, silently urging him to hang up the call. Bridgit had started talking about how much worry Chris had caused a while back, and how she was always worrying about him, then she had said, _“Are you listening, Oswald? Pay attention! I hate it when your eyes glaze over and you stare off into space while I'm talking, oh my god I just realised, Chris does the same thing! Don't you Cobblepots have an attention span of anything bigger than goldfish?”_

“Yes, I heard you, dear,” Oswald said, smiling politely into the camera as he recalled why his relationship with Bridgit all those years back hadn't been as perfect as he used to see it, when only recalling the better times.

Ed had looked away, trying to laugh quietly.

“I should go now,” Oswald said, “It's been lovely talking to you, Bridgit. We can catch up tomorrow. And don't worry about Chris, he's sleeping now, and he's out of danger.”

“I will be in Gotham by eleven thirty. I will meet you at the hospital by mid day. Don't be late.”

“I shall try to be on time,” he said, and as the call ended, he breathed a relieved sigh as he got up from his seat.

“Let's go home, Ed.”

Ed laughed again.

“Was she that bossy when you dated her?”

Oswald silently recalled her pushing him on to the bed, taking over as she seduced him, reaching into his pants as she said, _“Where is it...”_

“Yes,” was all he said in reply.

Ed took hold of his hand as they walked away from the room where Chris was recovering.

“It will be good to get home to the kids, and to have some proper time together,” Ed told him, glancing at him as they exchanged a smile, “And you need to rest! We're going to take good care of Little Oz.”

Oswald felt a glow of happiness.

“I like that name. Little Oz. I'm so glad you understand now, Ed! I was afraid I was losing you.”

“That will never happen,” Ed assured him.

Then as they reached the elevator, a sharp pain cut under his ribcage, and Oswald fell to his knees. The shock of falling was nothing to the shock he had felt on that tearing pain cutting through the place where the implant sat inside him. He pressed a hand below his ribs as he took in a shaken breath.

“Oswald?” Ed was leaning over him, and as he reached for him, grasping at his arm, he had broken into a cold sweat as another pain flickered through his body.

“ _Get help....”_ Oswald's eyes were wide with panic _“I think it's the baby! I can't lose my baby, Ed!”_

As Ed yelled to nearby medical staff, his mind was a swirl of panic. _He had hated this baby, even told Oswald to get rid of it... Now he wished he had never said those things._

“It's okay,” Ed told him as he tried to comfort him, placing his hand below his ribs, “You won't lose little Oz...”

 

 _If Ed had ever believed in karma, it was now. Karma, fate, the actions of some unseen hand, giving him payback for how he had treated Oswald._ That was how it felt forty minutes later when Lee had finished studying Oswald's scans. He was in a room that was far from where Christian was recovering. Ed had noticed, Oswald's room wasn't in the same area as the birth fathers and their newborns. This room was quiet, and it was peaceful outside in the corridor. From here, they couldn't hear the sounds of babies in maternity. Instead, they were here – because Lee had told him he would probably lose the baby. She expected him to miscarry... As she stood there talking to Oswald, Ed sat beside him, holding his hand and feeling like this was all his fault.

“It's the damaged implant,” Lee said, showing him scan results, “It's now twenty five percent detached. It's the position of the foetus and the flow of the chemicals and fluids that circulate the birthing unit, unfortunately it's pulling downwards and making the detachment issue worse. I can give you some medication to help the implant to break away and you can pass it in around three hours time. It's very small and you will feel minor contractions but with a couple of days rest you will be just fine.”

Oswald stared at her in disbelief.

“I'm _not_ terminating this baby!”

“But you are losing it anyway, I'm so sorry,” Lee said, “It's a very early stage pregnancy, you can have another implant at a later date if you want one. But clearly, the damage to this unit was much more serious than it initially seemed.”

Oswald looked at the scan, then back to Lee as he recalled all he knew about treatment options and found his strength and determination once more as that fierce urge to protect his child took over.

“You can inject me with a shot of the attachment formula, the same stuff the implant gets coated in before insertion. Use the scanner to position the needle and fill the gap, and it should mend the tear. I've read about this, it _does_ work.”

“And it has a ninety percent failure rate,” she reminded him.

Determination burned in Oswald's eyes as he kept a firm grip on Ed's hand.

“I'll take that risk,” he replied.

“Do you want me to call Jim?” Lee added.

“No!” exclaimed Ed.

“Yes,” Oswald told her.

As she left the room, Ed said no more as he sat in silence, holding Oswald's hand as he realised he had more to worry about than Jim turning up. This was a desperate attempt to save the baby and it probably wouldn't work, but Oswald was determined to try...

 

Ed felt even more certain this was some kind of punishment, the universe making him pay for the way he had treated his husband, as he felt powerless to comfort him as Oswald suffered the pain of a long needle pushed into his body, he was on his side when it was administered and as pain registered on his face and he gave a sharp cry, Ed knew he was weeping as he sat there silently, unable to do a thing to change this situation. He saw the dark substance clouding up in the gap where the implant was breaking away through a bur of tears as he heard Lee speaking softly to his husband, reminding him this had a high failure rate, and when she had finished dressing the puncture wound and had left the room, as Oswald rested in bed, on his back and saying nothing as he looked up at the ceiling and tried to fight the flickers of pain that had got worse since the needle, Ed could stay quiet no longer.

“ _This is my fault!”_

“No, it's not," Oswald said, "It was the damage from the crash, Ed. It was the implant. If this doesn't work -”

“ _It will!”_

Oswald's eyes widened as Ed shifted his chair closer and turned down the sheet, exposing the dressing below his ribcage. He placed his hand gently over it and looked into his husband's eyes.

“I'm staying like this.”

“What are you doing, Ed?” Oswald said in confusion.

“ _I'm holding Little Oz,”_ he replied tearfully, _“Because I never meant what I said about you having a termination. I didn't want you to get rid of the baby...”_ his gaze shifted down to the place where his hand gently rested against the dressing, _“I'm sorry, Little Oz, I'm so sorry, baby... I do want you! Please don't leave us, I will love you as much as I love your Daddy!”_ he gave a sob.

Oswald reached up and closed his hand gently over his arm.

“You don't have to do this, Ed, I know you never meant those things you said. What matters is, we're okay now. And this implant will make it if the treatment works. It probably won't, and I will probably miscarry. There is no possible way my unborn child can hear you, or that you can do a thing to save it.”

Ed didn't move his hand away.

“He can hear me,” he said quietly, “I'm going to hold him and not let go.”

Then the door opened. Jim hurried in with a look of deep concern in his eyes. It had been a hell of a shock to get a call while he was working, to be told Oswald was having a miscarriage. He had dropped everything including the case he was working on and dashed over, turning on the siren to cut through the traffic... Oswald was in bed, looking pale and tearful. Ed was looking equally distressed, and he had his hand over the dressing below Oswald's ribcage.

“I got here as soon as I could,” Jim said and as he took a chair and placed it the other side of Oswald's bed, Ed felt a brief prickle of anger, but then he remembered why he was here, and as Oswald gave a quiet sob and Jim kissed his cheek and promised he would stay and help, Ed met his gaze. Jim looked back at him, expecting anger but seeing none.

“Thank you for being here,” Ed said quietly.

Jim looked down at Ed's hand, protectively resting over the place where needle had been inserted.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“ _Holding Little Oz,”_ Ed replied in a hushed voice, _“So he stays with us. I suggest you do the same.”_

The two men looked at each other as Oswald looked up at them, and then to his surprise, Jim placed his hand over Ed's, and they both kept their hand over the dressing. Oswald placed his own hand over Jim and Ed's, and then managed a smile.

“If Little Oz could understand this, I'm sure he would know he's very loved,” he said, “Maybe we should _all_ hold him.”

Then he felt another flicker of pain deep inside and Ed stroked his hair as Jim spoke quietly to him, but no one moved their hand away from the unborn baby. They stayed that way for an hour, until the pain finally stopped.

 

When Lee returned to scan Oswald, she warned him to be ready for the outcome.

“You will probably find you went through that procedure for nothing,”she told him, “I know what I'm going to see.”

“But the pain has stopped,” Oswald replied as she prepared to scan him.

“That could mean the unit has detached. You won't feel any kind of contraction without medication to trigger it,” she added, “I'm sorry, but you need to be prepared for the worst.”

Ed took hold of Oswald's hand.

“I'm here for you, Oz,” he said quietly.

Jim took hold of his other hand.

“So am I,” he reminded him.

Ed looked at Jim and Jim looked away towards the monitor. Oswald's hand tightened in his grip, and Ed blinked away tears.

“ _Come on Little Oz,”_ he murmured _“Please be okay...”_

Lee studied the scan. Oswald was looking up at it too, and so were Ed and Jim, but Lee saw it first then Oswald saw it, and as he started to laugh, she looked at him in surprise.

“You see it too?”

“I most certainly do!” he said as tears of joy came to his eyes.

“What's going on?” Jim asked, knowing nothing about pregnancy or scans or having a clue if the treatment had worked or not. Clearly, Oswald was happy about something... Lee indicated to the narrow, dark line that had thickened, where before there had been a gap.

“Oswald, you're one of the ten precent that gets lucky with this procedure,” she said in surprise, “It worked! The fluid has bonded to the unit and internally to the implantation site and it's set in place. You have zero percent detachment and the baby is just fine.”

Relief shone in his eyes as he looked at Jim, then Ed. Jim and Ed looked at each other, then as Jim leaned closer and kissed Oswald's cheek, Ed did the same, kissing his other cheek. Oswald turned to Ed and hugged him, then he hugged Jim, who cautiously sat back, looking to Ed, waiting for a spark of anger. There was none. Instead, Ed smiled through tears of joy.

“We saved him together,” he said, “We saved Little Oz.”

“Maybe we did,” Jim agreed as his own eyes stung with tears. Then Jim got up, walked around the bed to Ed's side, and as Ed stood up, the two men briefly embraced. As he patted Ed's back, Jim let go and stepped back and wiped his eyes. Oswald sat there in bed looking on in surprise... _What had just happened, had brought the two of them together, wiping out all anger and rivalry..._ He placed his hand lovingly over the dressing that covered the needle mark.

“Well done Little Oz,” he said with a smile, “I knew you would make it!”

“You can go home when you feel ready,” Lee said to him, “The implant is set in place, as good as the day it was first inserted, you don't have to stay here, you're not at risk any more.”

“Thank you Lee,” he replied warmly, and as she left the room, he looked to his bedside, ready to tell Ed he wanted to get dressed and go home. But Ed had just left the room and now he was outside talking to Jim. Oswald listened, but didn't hear raised voices. He smiled again. This was a most unexpected outcome – the three of them had been in this room expecting a loss and instead, they had grown closer together... it made him hopeful for the future. First Ed had forgiven him and said he wanted the baby, and now Ed and Jim were getting along – at least, they were certainly not quarrelling or trying to kill each other, because all he could hear was low conversation from beyond the doorway, and then he saw them hug again.

 

Outside his room, Jim and Ed stepped back from that hug and looked at each other, seeing one another in a new light. This wasn't about being rivals any more – it was about working together. It was about both cherishing the same man who lit up both their lives and most of all, it was about taking care of Little Oz. Jim had known Ed long enough to realise he wasn't faking this new warmth that was present in his eyes as he smiled.

“Did you see the way Oswald's face it up when we both kissed him?” he said quietly, “I want to see him smile like that all the time.”

Jim nodded as the same warmth that shone from Ed's gaze reflected in his own. He had never thought about working together with Ed – until now. Neither had Ed, and it had taken this event for both of them to realise there was more than one way to handle a situation that had, at first, seemed to have no solution.

“I don't want to ever do anything to make you feel hurt or jealous. And I never want you to take anything out on Oswald!” Jim said, as a warning tone crept into his voice.

“Same here,” Ed replied, “I wouldn't allow you to hurt him either.”

“So where do we go from here?” Jim asked, “I just want Oz to be happy. And I want to be there for him as much as I can – as much as you can stand me doing that.”

“We can work something out,” Ed replied, “Starting with taking him home. I can't drive, I might go hazy on the route. I got here okay driving Chris, but my memory isn't what it used to be and I'm tired.”

“Then I'll drive,” Jim replied, and they both went back into the room, as Oswald looked at them in surprise.

“What is going on between the two of you?”

They exchanged a glance and smiled. Ed grabbed Oswald's clothing and placed it on the bed.

“I'll help you get dressed,” he said.

“And I'm driving you both home,” Jim added.

“Are you sure that's okay?” Oswald had asked that question as he looked at Ed.

“Yes, it's fine!” Ed insisted, “I can't drive, I might have one of my blank moments. We can't risk your safety, or Little Oz.”

“You're both too precious to put at risk,” Jim added, “From now on, me and Ed are both looking out for you.”

Oswald threw the overs back and reached for his clothes.

“Lee said I wasn't at risk, I'm fine now!”

“And we still want to take care of you,” Jim replied, then he glanced at Ed, “I'm going to the car. I'll see you soon.”

“Okay, Jim,” Ed replied, and as Jim left the room, Oswald stared in disbelief at Ed.

“You're welcoming him back into our lives?”

“Don't you want me to?”

“How do you feel about that?” Oswald said cautiously.

Ed smiled.

“After the miracle I saw today, I feel absolutely fine about it!” he said as his eyes filled with tears of joy again and he hugged Oswald, whose confused expression changed into a bright smile as he realised what had happened: _They had become united over Little Oz, and their shared love for the same man. It felt like another miracle - Jim and Ed had bonded...There would be no more anger, no more bad feeling. The future was suddenly looking much brighter..._

 

When the next morning came, Oswald woke with Ed's arms around him. As they lay together in their bed, in the bedroom they had shared for so many years, he felt silently thankful Ed had forgiven him and seen the situation in a new light. He turned over and Ed smiled and kissed him deeply, then drew back and told him “ _No lovemaking yet, I want to be sure you and the baby are okay. Got to look after Little Oz...”_ Then he had got up and left him to sleep, and as Oswald turned over on his side and placed his hand on the dressing that covered the needle mark that was starting to bruise, he smiled as he thought of his baby, a child who was safe now, who could grow and come into this world... a child he had come so close to losing. Then his smile faded and his heart ached for Jim as he pressed his face against the pillow and quietly wept.

_He wondered, was he being selfish?_

_Ed and Jim had agreed to be friends. The ice had melted, the anger was gone, and all of that would be destroyed in a split second if he gave in to the pain in his heart and took the father of his child in his arms again. He wanted Jim here, at his side – but life without Ed was unthinkable..._

 

Jim turned up that morning to take Hope to school. Ed was the one who opened the door and said, _Morning, Jim,_ and Hope had shot him a look of surprise as the two men had exchanged a brief smile, keeping up their new understanding.

“How's Oswald?” Jim had asked.

“Sleeping, I figured he ought to take it easy today,” Ed replied.

“Good plan,” Jim agreed, and then Hope got in the car and they drove away.

Ed closed the door and turned around to see Eddie pushing his toy truck up the hallway. He stopped when he reached him and smiled up at him. A sudden thought had come to Ed and it worried him, sending that sting of jealousy deep once more.

“When I was away, did Jim try and be a new Father to you?” he asked.

Eddie frowned, then he shook his head.

“No, he's Jim, he was _Jim_ to Eddie,” he replied.

Ed smiled.

“That's good to know,” he said in reply.

 _So, not replacing you as a father,_ Riddler whispered inside his head, _Very wise decision, Jim..._ Then Ed saw a bright green _swirly swirly_ on the wall, along with a few attempts at question marks.

“Oh no...” he whispered, recalling how furious Oswald had been last time Eddie had done that, but then Eddie asked him if he could watch TV and he took him through to the front room and forgot about the scribbles on the wall. An hour later, Oswald's phone rang. It was Bridgit, saying she was on her way to the hospital to see Christian. Oswald explained about the scare with the baby and said he would be resting today, but she was welcome to come over to the house later. Oswald got up and threw on a silken robe and grabbed his cane and limped down the stairs. He saw the bright green scribbles on the wall and yelled to Ed, who hurried to meet him with a confused look on his face.

“What's wrong?”

Oswald glared at the wall.

“You let him do this again?”

“I forgot to clean it off. But I did call the hospital and Chris is just fine, so you don't have to worry. And Bridgit is coming over this afternoon.”

Oswald gave a heavy sigh, shaking his head as he looked to the wall and then back at Ed.

“Clean it up! I don't want her coming over and this place looks like a shit hole, Ed!”

“I'm sorry,” he told him, “My memory...”

“Again,” Oswald added with a weary sigh, then his annoyance faded out as he saw the apologetic look in Ed's eyes. _Of course it was his memory, the legacy of the crash would always linger..._

“I'll clean it up,” Oswald said, “You go and keep an eye on Eddie.”

As he limped off towards the kitchen, Ed looked to the wall and the mess their son had made.

“Sorry, Oswald,” he said quietly.

 

At the hospital, Christian was resting in bed, feeling tired and sore and weak. His arms ached and felt heavy as he cradled Lauren and fed her. His eyes were red from crying after his mother had arrived and hugged him and said she had been so worried for him, and why didn't he tell her about the baby months ago? She had held Lauren, smiled and said she was beautiful, then asked Chris when he was coming home. That question had been met with silence, and then he had looked up from his baby daughter and met his mother's gaze.

“I want to stay in Gotham with my Dad. He can help me get better and he can help with the baby, too. He's a birth Daddy like me – he's had two kids of his own and has a third one on the way.”

Bridgit sat there looking immaculate in a tailored white suit, the burns on her face concealed with her own cosmetic products and her hair swept up into a long ponytail. She studied the look in her son's eyes and then gave a sigh.

“Well, I do think this is the best place for you. Oswald will be able to help you, I don't doubt that. And you will never know how afraid I was for you when Ed said you were critical! But you're going to be fine, I can see that. And you do keep in touch with me on a regular basis. I have no objection...” then as all trace of concern faded from her eyes, she shot him a warning look.

“But you had better _not_ get up to your old tricks like you did back home!” she said, pointing at him with a manicured finger, “I didn't work to build my business up for my son to trash his reputation! I bet you never told your Dad about the trouble you got into a while back?”

Christian looked down at his daughter as he fed her, and a sly smile crept to his face.

“Dad doesn't need to know about _that_ , Mom...”

“It's _not_ funny!” she warned him, “I'm surprised you had a relationship at all with Clara, especially after _that_ party and what you did with _that_ woman -”

“It was just a moment of weakness, Mom!”

Bridgit glared at him.

“It was _very_ humiliating for me, a party in our neighbourhood and you behaving like that! My own son, with Clara's aunt!”

He looked up from the child in his arms and met his mother's gaze as he tried not to smirk, but the look in his eyes gave it away.

“It's nothing to be proud of!” Bridgit exclaimed, “What is it with you and older women, Chris? Don't you _dare_ repeat those mistakes now you have a new start. You'll make your daughter ashamed of you!”

“Okay Mom,” he said, looking down at Lauren as he hid his smile, “I'll be more sensible...I'll only date girls of my own age. I wouldn't want to embarrass anyone...”

“You'd better behave!” she reminded him, then she looked at her watch.

“I should leave now, I said I'd meet with Oswald before I grabbed the flight back.” She got up, pausing to kiss his cheek, then she briefly smiled down at the baby in his arms, “If you need anything, just call me. And remember you have to rest, it's going to be a while before you can get active again.”

“Okay,” Chris replied, “I'll do that, Mom.”

Then she walked out of the room and he carried on feeding his baby, and as he thought of the _Aunt Susan incident_ , he chuckled.

“Grandma needs to lighten up!” he said, and Lauren, who had just finished her milk, smiled up at him.

 

A short while later, Bridgit arrived at the mansion. Ed had answered the door, after telling Oswald to _put something on_ , but Oswald had stayed on the sofa, lounging on it in a red silken robe with his feet up as he rested against cushions, sipping his coffee as his hair hung in his eyes and he announced he would be taking it easy all day and had no intention of moving from this spot.

Ed had led Bridgit through to the front room, she had gone over to Oswald and given him a hug and kissed his cheek, then she had said how glad she was that Chris and the baby were okay, and then she had told him he had better make sure he got plenty of rest after what had happened yesterday. Ed had made the coffee, then set it down on the table and while Oswald rested on one sofa, he and Bridgit sat on the other, and Bridgit began to talk. _And what she said certainly cast new light on Oswald's son..._

“Listen to this,” she said as she looked across the coffee table at Oswald, _“Our son needs to be watched. He's not the perfect guy you think he is.”_

Oswald sat up on the sofa and stretched out his damaged leg, then reached for his coffee.

“I never assume anyone is perfect, Bridgit. But I do know he did a very brave thing to carry his late girlfriend's child.”

She ran her hand over her hair and then set her coffee down on the table, then took a deep breath, bracing herself for the impact of what she was about to say.

“Chris has behaved _very_ badly...” Ed had looked away, already getting the measure of Bridgit: She was ambitious, had a multi million dollar business, she had come a long way since her days as enforcer for Penguin... Clearly, she had set very high standards for her son. _Her_ standards...

“Are you listening, Ed?” she asked, and he turned his head, forcing a smile.

“Yes, of course I am,” he replied.

Bridgit continued:

“Christian has had everything he could ever want in life. The best education, the best start in life – I mean, the name Bridgit Pike is associated with big business now – I was able to give him everything. _But._...” she lowered her gaze, shaking her head as she looked up again, to Ed then to Oswald, “Our son is _outrageous!_ He doesn't get it from me, it must come from _your_ side of the family!”

Oswald's eyes widened.

“What's _that_ supposed to mean?”

“Let me give you an example,” Bridgit said, briefly pausing, “ _The Aunt Susan incident!”_

She had said it so dramatically. Ed looked across the room at Oswald and smirked, sensing this would be something that would make either both of them, or certainly Riddler, laugh out loud.

“Aunt Susan?” Oswald asked.

Ed looked at him again, silently thinking, _Don't pick your coffee up, Oz... you'll spit it out over the table, I sense something coming here..._

Bridgit continued:

“We live in a _very_ select neighbourhood. Respectable millionaires, high fliers like me, business people. Reputation is everything! Clara's Aunt Susan is the only member of that family to have done anything prosperous with their lives. She used to be a model but now she runs a chain of vegan food stores... anyway, I had a party. I told Chris to behave and he was perfect all night, no chugging the booze, he was great. _Then he went missing. DO you know where I found him?”_

Oswald looked at her blankly as he shook his head. Ed looked away again, bracing himself for the punchline.

“I found him in the spare room, with Susan.... Forty-one year old Susan with her ratty hair extensions and her silicone boobs! _Why_ he would want to go with an ex centrefold model is beyond me!”

“Why indeed,” Ed said quietly as he looked away, biting his lip as he held in his laughter.

Oswald was just staring at her, looking across the table with a blank expression as Bridgit carried on talking like Chris had committed the crime of the century.

“That dirty little _perv_ had told her he was twenty three! He was three months off his eighteenth birthday! I told her the truth and she slapped his face. I felt humiliated, Oswald! My son. Chasing after older women! When I walked into that room he was fucking her...Ed, “ she touched his arm, “Are you listening? Pay attention! _He was fucking her like porn star!_ ”

“Well if he has a preference for older women, it's just how he is,” Oswald told her, not daring to look at Ed, who was struggling not to laugh, “He did say he had cheated on Clara a few times and that she wasn't his usual type of woman, but he didn't say anything else. I can assure you an age gap relationship wouldn't be looked on as scandalous in an open minded city like Gotham.”

She gave a weary sigh.

“Spoken like a true Gotham man – anything goes, anything at all! He could be fucking twin sisters aged _fifty_ and no one would bat an eyelid here!”

“Bridgit,” Oswald said calmly as he noticed she was getting worked up, “As far as I am concerned, Christian is a sensible guy. He doesn't drink, he doesn't do drugs, he even drives carefully. And he's just given birth to his late girlfriend's child and that wasn't easy for him. He's very mature for his age. I don't have any concerns about his choice of partner - when he decides to start dating again. And that won't be for a while, he's got a few months recovery ahead of him, what happened has left him very weak. He's going to need all my support to learn how to cope with his recovery and how to look after a newborn baby. Don't worry about his future choices, just know he's going to be okay with us.”

“If you have any problems, just call me,” she said as set set down her coffee and got up, “I have to leave now, I have a flight to catch soon. Business never stops running and it won't run well without me.”

Oswald sat up and gave her a hug, then kissed her cheek as he said goodbye. Ed walked her to the door and told her to have a safe journey. Then she left and he closed the door, and hurried back down the hallway to rejoin Oswald in the front room.

“Oh my god!” he exclaimed, and he laughed loudly, as Riddler slipped though and his eyes sparkled with amusement.

“ _Never mind that Firefly was torching people to DEATH with a flamethrower in her youth, Chris had a forty-one year old ex centrefold – crime of the century, Oz – your son was fucking her like a porn star! Ha ha ha!”_

Oswald smiled and shook his head as he tried not to laugh too.

“It's not amusing, Ed!”

“Yes, it is! Who would have thought Chris had a secret side like that?”

“Perhaps in time I can introduce him to a few respectable associates of mine – I know a few older women with underworld connections, very nice people...I'll be careful who he mixes with,” Oswald replied.

Ed's eyes danced with amusement.

“No, leave him to his own devices! This is Gotham City, let him roam free to take shots at cougars of his choice, Oz!”

Now Oswald's eyes reflected amusement too.

“I never would have guessed he was addicted to older women. But, that's his business, it's nothing to do with us.”

Then Ed joined Oswald on the sofa, shifting close to him as he put his arm around him.

“When Chris comes home, I'll help you take care of him. He's going to have a tough time, coping with recovery and his newborn. I don't want you to get stressed over anything. Maybe Jim should come over more often too, see the kids, help out, maybe stay over a few nights a week? I think we could use the extra help. And he's Hope's Dad and father to Little Oz. It would make sense, he's family.”

Oswald felt his heart skip a beat and the missed beat was full of hope and guilt mixed as one. _Jim, here at the house more often? Clearly when Ed had said they would work together to take care of him and the baby, he had been very serious about it. And that would put temptation in his way, too..._ He couldn't help but give the only answer that resonated with that skipped beat of his heart.

“That is a wonderful idea, Ed!” Oswald agreed brightly as he hid thoughts that filled him with guilt. _Yes he wanted Jim here, and not just to help out. The guilt weighed heavy, but he hid it with a smile as he wondered how long his self control would hold out..._

 

 

 

 


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

 

The days passed by. Jim was a regular visitor at the house, taking Hope to school, helping out with Eddie while Oz was resting and Ed was getting forgetful and easily tired. Jim was starting to see how the house was run now: Ed's accident had been a disaster that would linger. Oswald had been a birth Daddy of two kids, coping well until this third pregnancy. Now Ed couldn't be as helpful as he used to be, he forgot to clean up after their lively young son, he often fell asleep in the afternoons, too. Hope was getting moody in her teenage years when she was nagged to remember school work before seeing her friends and Oswald couldn't keep up with it all because his pregnancy was already making him feel tired. Jim didn't blame him for wanting to rest after the miscarriage scare, but that extra help from Ed around the house and with the kids was certainly less than it used to be, and it was not Ed's fault. Jim did all that he could, especially to help Oswald, who was so appreciative when he brought him coffee or a sandwich after cleaning up after the kids while he was resting.

“ _Thank you, Jim,”_ he would say with that cute smile of his as he batted his eyelashes as he relaxed on the couch in a silky robe, and Jim looked away because he felt heat spread through his face. They had not talked about their relationship, or about the possibility of having more, not since Ed had returned and to Jim, it only seemed right. He had understood even with a broken heart that Oswald had, quite rightly, wanted to save his marriage.

Jim stayed over at the weekends, in a spare room, and that room was at a distance from the bedroom Ed shared with Oswald.

Some nights Jim would lie awake as his heart ached as much as his body as he thought of Oz, just a short distance away, in bed – and with Ed instead of him. Then he would quietly jerk off behind the privacy of his locked door, whispering _Oz_ under his breath as he came quietly, feeling as if he had got away with a crime.

Oswald visited Lee for scans every week to be sure the baby was okay – but she had told him, weekly visits were not really necessary. Little Oz was thriving. Jim and Ed both went with Oswald for every appointment. The unborn child had solidified their friendship. Secretly, Oswald was too aware of Jim's closeness when they sat together for his baby scans and he and Ed held his hands, keeping to that promise to both be there for Little Oz.

 

Three weeks after Lauren's birth, Chris came home. He could walk short distances with a cane and was getting used to the fact that he would always have a limp due to the paralysis, but he was weak and needed a lot of rest and spent most of his time in his room, either sleeping or taking care of his daughter. _The baby cried a lot._ Jim was woken one night by Lauren wailing loudly, then he had heard Chris call for his Dad. Jim had opened up his door and looked out to see a very tired Oswald wrapped in a silky robe limp to his son's room, and as he opened the door, he spoke to him quietly.

“It's three am, Chris!” he said, “What's the matter?”

Chris gave a sob.

“ _I'm tired, Dad. She won't stop crying, she keeps waking me up!”_

Oswald had spoken again to his son, then gone downstairs and returned with a bottle of milk, and then he had gone back into his son's room.

“Babies do cry a lot,” Oswald reminded him, “I know you're tired -”

“ _I just want some sleep!”_ Chris said tearfully.

“Not yet,” Oswald replied, handing him Lauren, “Feed you daughter, Chris.”

“But I'm _so_ tired!” he said again as he gave a sob.

“She's your baby, your responsibility. I know it's hard work, but you chose to have her, and you must take care of her,” Oswald replied.

Now Lauren was quietly feeding, content in her Daddy's arms. Jim had ducked back in the doorway of his own room as tired Oswald had left his son to feed his baby and limped off back to bed. Clearly, life would be twice as hard now Chris was back, still recovering from the birth and struggling to adjust.

Jim was feeling the strain too, tired on Monday mornings from spending the weekend helping pregnant, tired Oz and forgetful Ed and tearful and exhausted Chris. Eddie was full of energy, constantly. Hope was always complaining that she never got a moments peace to talk to her friends or do her homework without interruption. At least she could go over to Tabby's and see Nessa. Jim didn't ask Tabby to take Eddie at the weekends, because she did enough to help out in the week. Kids were hard work...

 

_Five months passed by._

Life had slid into a new kind of normal now, Oswald was six months pregnant, winter had melted away into spring and life was getting better. Lauren had settled down to become a happy and contented baby. Once Chris was over the pain of stitches and the exhaustion caused by his brush with death, he had found his energy again, which he often paid for with pain - because because being too energetic gave him deep pain in his hip and his leg, much like the pain his father frequently suffered. But he was a great Daddy to Lauren, and often spent time with Eddie so the two youngest kids could be together. Eddie adored Lauren, and being around the baby had a calming effect on him. The _swirly swirly_ scribbles on the walls stopped, and so did his tantrums.

Jim found the atmosphere in the house was more relaxed at weekends, and Hope was complaining less about noise. But it was still tiring, coping with a house full of kids and a heavily pregnant Oswald, who was struggling with pain in his hip and feeling the strain of the extra weight to his damaged leg. Ed was still forgetful, but that was just how Ed was now. Jim didn't complain. He wished he could grab time alone with Oswald. There had been stolen looks across the dinner table and a few times he had passed him in the upper hall and they had talked alone and the eyes were certainly the window to the soul in those moments... but Oswald had said nothing about getting closer to him. Jim was sure he wanted to, but with Ed and their family at stake? _It was something he didn't dare to voice aloud..._

 

By now, Ed had finally got around after many, _many_ reminders, to getting the scratched paintwork on the Porsche repaired. Now he stood in the driveway with Chris, who had certainly changed since Lauren's birth. Now he spiked up his light brown hair a little in the style of Oswald. He also used one of Oswald's spare canes, a slender black cane with a small penguin head for a handle. He wore a long, thick turquoise coat that was open as the breeze whipped at it, beneath it he wore black jeans and polished shoes and a shirt that was open at the neck. A diamond stud sparkled in his ear. He had recently started getting tattoos, a small umbrella in honour of his father was inked on the inside of his wrist. His other project had only just been completed a week before – he had _Lauren_ written in fancy scroll over his heart along with the date of her birth – and it really clashed with his other tattoo, one he had done before moving to the city – a devil riding a demon horse with the words _Born to Raise Hell_ written beneath it.

Ed watched as Chris limped around one side of his car, his eyes narrowing as he got up close to the paintwork and inspected it, then he went around the other side and ran a fingertip along the body work, up closer, taking his time.

“I think you're okay now, baby...” he murmured to his car as he gave the bodywork a pat. Ed looked away and laughed. Chris certainly was an eccentric guy for one so young...

“I told you I'd get it fixed. I just forgot for a while,” Ed told him.

Chris leaned on his cane as he turned to him.

“You did a great job. Thanks for fixing her up. I take her out more these days, I was very conscious of her scar.”

“And you think maybe she was too?” he asked, and whether Chris realised he was joking or not was lost to him, because a car rolled up in the driveway and as Tabby got out and Barbara joined her, Chris turned sharply, looking towards the visitors, then as he looked back at Ed, in that moment, his son reminded him of Oswald back in the old days, when he was busy making some grand criminal plot...

“ _Who is that stunning blonde?”_ he demanded.

Ed laughed. _Oh god, no... he had the hots for Barbara?_

“That's Barbara Kean, she's Jim's ex. A friend of Tabby's.”

Chris turned back, leaning on his cane, ready limp over and move in for the kill. Ed had never seen him move so fast since the paralysis.

“I just remembered I needed to have a word with Tabby,” Ed told him, and hurried off, getting there first, standing in front of Barbara as he greeted her warmly.

“Long time no see!” he said, “How are you, how is the bar doing these days? Me and Oz must stop by soon...”

Barbara got the oddest sensation of being stared at, as she touched the back of her neck and turned her head, Ed's eyes widened... There was Chris, leaning against his Porsche as the wind whipped at his coat and he gave a little wave... She had actually _felt_ the power of his stare on the back of her neck?

“Come inside,” he said quickly, as he silently thought Barbara could be trouble... not a great choice of date, no matter how hard Christian's hormones were raging at the sight of an attractive older woman...

 

As they went inside, Chris joined them.

“How are you, Chris? You're looking great!” Tabby said warmly.

He smiled.

“I'm fine thanks, Tabby...” he turned elegantly as he leaned on his cane, “And _you_ must be Barbara! I've heard _so_ much about you!”

As she stood there in a short black dress and a matching coat that was open, showing off her long, slender legs, she smiled and he smiled back at her as he extended his hand.

“Christian Cobblepot,” he said, and as she took his hand, he didn't shake it , instead he brought her hand to his lips and kissed the back of it. She smiled again, as the thought suddenly struck her that Chris resembled his father...

“I've heard all about you!” she exclaimed, “I think you're very brave to have your girlfriend's baby. That's a tough choice to make.”

Chris shrugged it off.

“Oh, it was no big deal. Childbirth was easy for me!” he said as Ed shot him a look of disbelief.

Tabby and Barbara had come to visit Oswald, who was glad to see them both as they hugged him and then sat down in the front room and talked for an hour. In that time, Chris came in with Lauren and Barbara held her and said what a beautiful daughter he had, and then Ed cut into the conversation, before reminding Chris that Lauren was due for a feed. By the time he had fed and then changed Lauren and put her down for a nap, Barbara and Tabby had left.

“Thanks for blocking my cock, Ed!” he said as Ed closed the front door and he turned to see Chris standing there, glaring up at him with a look that reminded him of a young, angry Oswald.

“You don't want to get mixed up with Barbara,” Ed replied, “You have _no_ idea how tough she is or how much trouble she was mixed up back in the old days. She's not the kind of person to mess around with.”

Christian's eyes lit up excitedly.

“A _fiery_ vintage beauty!” he exclaimed, “I'm up for a challenge!”

“Oh god, _no_...” Ed groaned, shaking his head. 

But Chris was captivated by Barbara. He silently decided to find out more about her...

 

Later that night, when the kids were in bed and Chris had settled Lauren and he had gone off to bed too, Oswald was feeling stiff and tired and his hip was hurting and his damaged leg ached deeply as he put his arm around Ed and he climbed the stairs, pausing mid way to catch his breath.

“We had this issue when you were pregnant with Eddie,” Ed reminded him, “You can't help this, it's just the extra weight.”

“I just want to lie down,” Oswald told him, and Ed helped him to the top of the stairs and then they went to the bedroom, where Oswald sat down heavily on the bed.

“I'll get you undressed, my love,” Ed said fondly as he knelt down on the rug and helped Oswald take off his shoes, then he paused to rub at his ankle before getting up and helping him with his jacket and then his shirt.

“Oh honey, you look so tired,” Ed said fondly as Oswald reached for his belt and unbuckled it.

“I'm exhausted, this baby feels twice as heavy as the last one,” Oswald replied, then he stripped off the rest of his clothing and pushed back the covers and laid down on the bed. Ed looked at him for a moment, taking in the sight of that growing bump below his ribcage, and then he smiled.

“You look so beautiful,” he said softly, and as he sat down, Oswald tugged down his underwear and kicked it aside, where it landed on the floor.

“I'm finally at that constantly horny phase!” he said as his eyes shone brightly, “I keep getting hard for no reason...even the aches and pains and the tiredness doesn't prevent it! And it's been happening all day!”

Ed started to smile again as he leaned closer and slid his hand down to his solid erection.

“Ah, I love that phase too!” he murmured, making a trail of gentle kisses down Oswald's body, then taking his cock into his mouth. Oswald closed his eyes, giving a sigh as Ed sucked him slowly, lovingly.

As Oswald slid his fingers though his hair, he couldn't help but imagine Jim there, just for a fleeting moment: _Jim then Ed, taking turns to suck him off... Damn these pregnancy hormones,_ he thought silently, as the need for climax built up sharply and he thrust against Ed's mouth, coming hard as he gave a gasp. Ed sucked and swallowed and then released him, he paused to kiss above his pubic hair, then as he slid up the bed to wrap his arms around him, he placed a kiss on his baby bump.

“I love you so much,” Ed whispered in his ear, then he kissed his cheek and got up.

“I'm taking a shower before bed.”

Oswald smiled as he relaxed, resting on his side as he grabbed a pillow to cushion his back, watching Ed strip off his clothing.

 

By the time Ed was out of the shower, Oswald was sleeping. Ed smiled as he got into bed, running his hand gently down his body. Since the miscarriage scare, all of their lovemaking had been gentle even though Oswald had insisted he was fine. Ed had noticed Oswald's cock was getting hard again already. He certainly was at that constantly turned on phase...

“ _Let me help you with that, Oz...”_ he whispered in his ear, and as he felt Ed's hand close around his cock and start to gently stroke, he smiled as he gave a murmur, turning over as much as his pregnant body would allow, opening his legs wider.

“ _Oh yes please, yes Ed, yes Jim...”_ he whispered.

Ed stopped, carefully drawing his hand away as he stared down at his husband, who had given a sigh and carried on sleeping... _Ed and Jim? He was having a fantasy about both of them?_

Ed got out of bed, barely able to contain his rage as he went into the bathroom and locked the door. He opened the bathroom cabinet and reached for his meds. _No. Fuck it. Why should I control my alter ego when he can't control his fucking libido?_ Ed said silently.

He looked into the mirror and saw his own rage simmering back at him.

“ _You fucking IDIOT!”_ yelled Riddler, and Ed's hand flew to his own cheek, slapping it sharply.

“Don't touch me again!” Ed fumed.

“ _Do you really think he can forget what he had with the father of his daughter and the unborn kid?”_ demanded Riddler, _“You wanted to wake him and confront him? You're such a prick sometimes! Edward fucks it up yet again!”_

“Shut up!” Ed said sharply, hoping he had not woken Oswald. Knowing he was having a quarrel with his split personality would be the last thing Oz needed right now, he expected him to keep _that_ under control... Ed had also hoped for a little more support from Riddler. But then he remembered he had said before, there was another solution. He had not listened. Now he was being forced to listen.

“ _He's always going to be there. You can't get rid of Jim! You invited him in, Ed. What would you do without him when that messed up memory of yours lets_ _you down?”_

Ed looked into the mirror. Now he saw Riddler looking back at him, and as he leaned in he spoke in a low voice, “ _Worthless to one, but priceless to two – even better with three? Think about it, Edward!”_

Ed blinked. He was staring back at his own reflection. He took the pills from the cabinet and swallowed them quickly with water. But Riddler's suggestion was still stuck in his head:

  
_The three of them, together, was that was Oswald wanted?_

Ed wasn't sure how he felt about that. It was true, Jim would always be around because of the kids – and now, they couldn't cope without him. Ed appreciated him too. He appreciated all of Jim's help... Now new thoughts were swirling in his mind and he felt strangely aroused, he had been hard while he had sucked Oswald, but it had faded out after his quarrel with Riddler. Now it was back, as he pictured Oswald on his back as he held him in his arms and directed Jim to suck on his cock. He could picture the look on Oswald's face... Jim fingering Oswald's ass, three fingers, then four, _“Now fist him,”_ Ed imagined himself saying, as Oswald had the hardest climax of his life.. . Ed had tugged on his zip and freed his cock without thinking, now he was jerking hard and as he came in a messy spurt that hit the toilet seat, his come was still running over his hand as he recovered his breath.

“ _What am I thinking?”_ he whispered, then he cleaned up the mess and took a shower, but those thoughts still flickered through his head and as the words, _If I was in control of it, I would watch them and come so hard,_ came to mind, he pushed it away, reminding himself he had to stay silent about these thoughts. He had the feeling Oz would love the idea, maybe Jim would too... but he had to keep it in his head. _This felt like a new secret he could share with no one. The thought of the three of them together was surprisingly, sharply arousing..._

 

Next morning when Tabby met Barbara at work, the bar was closed to customers and Barbara was in her office. Her phone call that morning, urging her to come in and see what had happened intrigued her, and now as she walked through the door, she looked to the desk in surprise.

“Oh my god... who sent that?” she said, looking to the huge bouquet of red roses. Barbara had a card in her hand, and she smiled as she read out the message:

“ _You captivate me.”_

“Who sent that?” Tabby asked again.

Barbara shrugged.

“I have no idea,” she replied, “But a strange number has been sending me text messages too, some guy asking me for a date. He won't tell me his name or where he knows me from... he said I won't be disappointed. He sounds rather... _exciting_.”

Tabby caught a look in her eyes. She knew that look well...

“You mean he's rather dominant? Has he sent you pictures?”

Barbara smiled.

“Let's just say I had a couple of interesting shots... nothing that showed his face, though. He's got a great body... He said he knows me, that we met recently. I asked him to come along to the club and say hi. Look what he said in reply!”

She held out her phone, scrolled down to the final message:

_Not yet, Barbara. I want to get to know you first. You can wait for this. It will be worth it!_

“He wants to make you wait?” Tabby said in surprise, “He's either a weirdo, or maybe he's genuinely crazy about you. I can't tell which it is. You should try and get him to come to the bar.”

“He won't do it,” she replied with a smile, “And I have no idea who he is – but if he wants to send gift like that,” she looked to the huge bouquet, “I don't mind waiting to meet him!”

“Maybe he'll send you more gifts.”

Barbara's eyes sparkled. It had been a while since anyone had indicated an interest. She had been alone for a long time...

“This is actually fun,” she added, “I just can't work out who he is...Maybe I'll like him, maybe not. I won't know until I meet him.” And she kept her gaze on the flowers, feeling highly intrigued...

 

For Oswald, the weekend couldn't come around fast enough. Jim was coming over and he was constantly hard, so easily aroused. He was sure having Jim and Ed about the house together while he was going through this phase would be heavenly – as long as he managed to hide his arousal...

He wasn't the only one who was turned on. Those damned thoughts Riddler had put into his head of threesomes with Jim were refusing to ease up and Ed couldn't shake them. They played through his head every time he looked at Oswald, and Oswald just thought he was in a good mood because he smiled a lot...

When the time drew near for Jim to arrive, Ed had been fantasising so heavily – and Oswald had already pressed up against him twice that day, with that look in his eyes. He had sucked him, then he had jerked him off and he knew he would be hard again later. This was his favourite part of Oswald's pregnancy, he remembered how he had been at six months with Eddie, heavy with the baby, aching and limping with difficulty, but oh, _so_ horny all the time...

Ed's cock was aching. Jim was soon arriving. And Hope was over at Nessa's after school and Chris had taken Lauren and Eddie to the park to enjoy a rare sunny day with no clouds or hint of rain. _They would be alone in the house. The three of them. And Ed was suddenly a mess of shaking nerves._ It was crazy, these thoughts were just images in his head, but Riddler had put them there and.... it would be easier if Riddler helped him out with this.

“Do I try and... _initiate_ something?” he muttered as he stood alone in the kitchen washing the dishes.

“ _Yes!”_ Riddler said enthusiastically, _“What's hard, comes in a pair, is better than one and makes Oswald scream?”_

Ed shook his head as he knew the answer right away.

“Two cocks.”

“ _I can't wait for this!”_ Riddler said, _“Step aside, let me do this, you know you want to!”_

Ed took a deep sigh of longing.

“We have to control it, tell them what to do.”

“ _Give the orders!”_

“Yes!”

Ed's pants felt like they were ready to burst. Then Jim knocked on the door and Ed let go of the dinner plate, leaving it in the water, drying his hands quickly as he hoped his nerves would not show. _It felt like a devious plan. But Oz had said both their names in his sleep..._

 

Ed opened the door and Jim entered the house, looked about and seemed surprised.

“It's quiet!”

“The kids are out.”

Jim smiled as he thought of Oswald, guessing he would be resting. It was Friday afternoon, he would be on a sofa somewhere in a silk robe, looking a hot lazy mess... He couldn't wait to see him...

“Jim...” they had been heading towards the front room when Ed spoke and stopped walking, and Jim stopped too.

“What is it, Ed?”

Ed hesitated. _No, no I can't do it..._ Ed thought, and he felt an inner push form Riddler. He felt him creeping in as he started to smile.

“ _I think Oswald wants a threesome! He said both our names in a dream and he was very turned on!”_

Jim stared at Ed.

“You're serious?”

Ed smiled as his eyes shone with glee. Riddler was taking control now, and it felt good... Jim had felt his hopes soar sky high on hearing that suggestion. _The three of them? Why not?_ He was often over at the house, he was never away for long and the three of them got along so well. They shared the chores, the kids and Oswald, as they both looked out for him and Little Oz...

“Are you sure we should mention this?” Jim asked, “I don't want to stir up any trouble, Ed.”  
“He's married to me, not you,” Ed replied, “We can do this and keep it in its place... shared _fun_ sometimes. I could tell you what to do. Oz would love it.”

Jim smiled nervously. The thought had sent a shot of arousal up his cock and sent it semi hard.

“You want to ask him?”

“Yes!” Ed said, “If he takes offence, we can laugh it off. But I don't think he will!”

Jim said no more as he followed Ed into the front room. There was Oswald laying on the sofa, wrapped in a red silk robe, his hair hanging in his eyes, and he looked _so_ tempting...

“Oswald, wake up!” Ed said softly.

He stirred and then shifted on the sofa, pushing a cushion behind his back as he tried to lay half on his side and allow for the weight below his ribcage, then he looked up to see Jim and Ed standing over him.

“Hi Jim!” he said with a smile, sounding lazy from sleep.

Jim smiled down at him.

“Hello, Oswald,” he said fondly.

Ed was still smiling. Like he was up to something... Oz felt suspicious.

“What's going on? I sense something in the air?”

Jim and Ed exchanged a glance

“I heard you talking in your sleep,” Ed told him, “You and me and Jim... it sounded fun!” Now his eyes lit up... Riddler's eyes.

Oswald stared at him... _Fun?_ He was coming around to the idea of what, the three of them getting even closer? _Getting sexual?_ It felt like a dream come true. _Maybe he was dreaming._ Oswald pinched his arm. _No, not dreaming..._

He smiled and then he blushed.

“Well, this is most unexpected...” he was getting hard again. He reached for his robe, pulling away from his body, folding it over, trying to hide his erection.

“Don't do that,” said Ed, “Don't hide it.”

Oswald gave a deep sigh as he laid back, giving into his desires, hoping the two of them would just help themselves to his body.

“I'm constantly hard at this phase of the pregnancy,” he said, looking up at his husband, then to Jim, “Any _help_ would be most appreciated...” and he smiled that flirty little smile that drove both of them wild.

Jim cast a hesitant glance to Ed.

“Well?” he said quietly, “Shall we?”

“Let's open up that robe,” said Ed.

Oswald's lips parted as he took in a shaky breath, watching with wide eyes as Ed untied his robe, then spread it open, exposing his body completely. His cock got even harder, painfully so at the sight of Ed and Jim both looking at him as he lay there exposed.

“I'll stay here,” Ed said, kneeling on the carpet, level with the spot where Oswald was resting against the sofa, then he shifted closer and wrapped his arms around him, kissing him deeply. Oswald was trembling as the kiss ended and he felt Jim place his hands on his thighs and he willingly parted his legs wider.

“Play with his ass,” Ed said, “Be gentle, go slowly. _We can get a fist in there_.”

Jim had sat on the sofa between Oswald's open legs, now his fingers were stroking at his entrance as the implant sensed his arousal and he became instantly wet and inviting. Oswald gave a gasp and looked up at Ed.

“I've never taken that much...”

“You will today,” Ed said lovingly as he pushed a stray lock of hair from Oswald's wide eyes, “You're going to _love_ this!”

Jim pushed two fingers in deep. Oswald gave a low whine, arching his back and then, thankful that Ed was behind him, wrapped his arms around him as Ed whispered words of reassurance and watched the erotic sight of Jim's fingers in his husband's ass.

“He can take more,” Ed said, and Jim drew his fingers out, then pushed them back in, adding a third.

Oswald gave a quiet cry of pleasure and pain mixed together.

“You are _very_ accommodating down there,” Jim whispered, then he placed a kiss above his pubic hair that made him shiver.

“Get the fourth in and tuck in your thumb,” Ed said, enjoying every moment as he gave instruction, “And push slowly up to the knuckles...” he grinned as his eyes sparkled and he looked down at Oswald, who was trembling and sweating, his face was flushed and his cock couldn't get any harder. He wouldn't last much longer, he was about to have his mind blown...

“This is where my medical knowledge comes in!” Ed added, “Keep it there, just light pressure. Feel him open up...”

As the tightness that gripped Jim's hand began to relax and expand, Oswald gave a cry of bliss at the exquisite feeling happening to his lower body, he had never had this much before, not _there_ , and it felt wonderful.

“Now fist him,” said Ed, and as Jim's knuckles pushed in and he cautiously slid in a fraction more, Oswald gave a loud moan.

“ _Oh fuck! Fuck, fuck, FUCK!”_ he gasped.

Ed tugged down his zip, keeping one hand on Oswald's damp hair as he reassured him as the other gripped his own cock. He was panting and jerking hard, coming in sharp spurts as he watched Jim push his hand a little deeper.

“ _Oh god!”_ he gasped, _“Help him, Jim...”_

Jim didn't need to be told twice. His hand stayed buried inside as he leaned forward, sucking on Oswald's cock. He was there for seconds and Oz gave a loud cry, his whole body shaking as he lost control. Jim sucked and swallowed and waited for the last throb to ease off as he slowly and gently withdrew his hand, then he sat there, keeping him spread, watching as his entrance slowly closed up again. He was panting hard, he couldn't close his legs, that orgasm had wiped him out. Jim shifted closer to him, jerking his own cock as he gasped in short bursts. He came between Oswald's open legs, covering him with a hot, fast climax.

“ _Oh that was amazing!”_ It was all Oswald could say. He couldn't move, he was covered in come and no doubt the sofa would need cleaning too. But as he lay there he started to smile as he looked to Jim and then up at Ed.

“That was wild,” he said softly, “Thank you...”

Ed replied with a kiss, then Jim leaned in. He paused.

“Is it okay if I...”

“You may kiss him,” Ed assured him.

Jim leaned closer, his lips meeting with Oswald's as they shared a deep and lasting kiss, then Jim pulled back.

“That was so good!” it was all he could think to say.

Oswald looked to his husband and then to his lover... _Was Jim his lover now, with his husband's consent? It seemed to be that way._ He smiled radiantly and he held out his arms and Ed got there first, then Jim sat on the other end of the sofa pulling his feet into his lap as started to rub at his aching ankle.

“Oh Ed, this is beyond anything I could have imagined! The three of us...It's perfect! Thank you, my love!”

Ed embraced him tightly, and now both men were smiling. Yes this was a way forward, Ed and Oz in their marriage, and making the most of their shared time with Jim...

 

They talked a lot that day, while the house was empty, plans were made. Jim would move in but take a spare room. Ed and Oz would share the bedroom together as usual. They would have their threesome fun when the urge took them, and this changed nothing – Oz was still with Ed and Jim was their close friend, invited in for their secret play time. Oswald had been the one who had said immediately, there would be nothing with Jim, not without Edward present. Jim had agreed as he exchanged a smile with Oswald and then with Ed: This felt right, it might not be a usual family set up, but now, there were three in this relationship, and all working together, to love one another and make sure the family ran smoothly. That day, new rules had been laid, this would be their new arrangement, and it made the three of them happy.

 

They sat the family down and explained everything that evening – Jim would be moving in permanently, because he was now _“Much closer to Edward and I,”_ Oswald had explained, _“He is like a second husband to us both.”_

Hope had been thrilled. She had got up and hugged all three of them. Chris had smiled and said “I'm happy for you – and you guys make a great team, I'm not exactly surprised this has happened.” Then they had told Little Eddie that Uncle Jim was going to be living at the house, and he was going to be like another father to him. Eddie had smiled at his fathers, “Okay!” he had replied, and gone off to play with his toy truck.

 

With the family happy with the news, Jim went ahead and moved in. And it worked well as Oswald's pregnancy advanced, he was there to help him, and Ed was thankful. When Oswald was feeling horny, he and Ed enjoyed him together and Oswald loved every moment of taking the attentions of two men at the same time.

_But there was a downside to this new arrangement:_

Handling a family every day, and coping with his job at the GCPD was tiring. Jim coped - for now. But he worried about how life would be when Little Oz was born, another baby under the same roof as Lauren and Eddie... Lauren had settled at night but sometimes, she cried and sometimes, it woke Eddie, which made for a very sulky and badly behaved toddler due to lack of sleep. As much as Jim looked forward to the birth of Little Oz, he was also afraid it might be an event that would see him struggling to cope. He hoped he would never have to choose between work and family. Work was a huge part of his life and he couldn't imagine giving _that_ up for anyone...

 

_The time moved on smoothly._

Jim's routine now consisted of several jobs:

When Ed got forgetful or confused, he helped him out.

When Christian had aches and pains that caught up with him because he was an active young guy and his limp sometimes became painful, giving him issues with his mobility that frustrated him, Jim helped him up the stairs, or to and from the bathroom. He also helped out with Lauren, because Ed was forgetful and couldn't do more than one task at a time.

He helped his daughter with her homework. And of course, often drove Hope to school. And Oswald was getting bigger every day, and now he was past the horny phase of his pregnancy. He was tired all the time, his hip hurt, his damaged leg hurt, he and Ed helped him get dressed, get up and down the stairs, get on and off the sofa... It was hard work, and on top of that, Jim was working full shifts every week. He often fell asleep at his desk, and sometimes had to make an excuse to leave work early, because he was needed at home. It was never ending...

 

_Oswald was almost nine months pregnant by now._

Jim had just finished work and closed up his office one evening when he heard two cops lingering back into the corridor, laughing as they talked, and he heard the name _Penguin._ He cast a glance in the direction of the two men, and casually walked closer, then paused, listening as they both laughed and spoke again:

“ _I remember that guy from the old days,” one cop said, “He used to be a crime lord. He looked like a flirty little tramp back then!”_

“ _I've heard he's got a kid by Nygma – remember him? Used to be a criminal called Riddler...green suit, question marks?” said the other._

“ _Oh Yeah, he married him,” the cop recalled, “And now...” he lowered his voice, “I hear he's got TWO kids by Detective Gordon - one is one the way any day now! And he's changed his address to the Van Dahl mansion! The three of them, living together! I guess one cock isn't enough for Cobblepot!”_

_They both laughed. Jim felt fire and rage rising as his fist tightened. The cops were still talking._

“ _I wonder what he sees in Jim,” said the cop who had just laughed, “I think we know what Jim sees in the creepy little millionaire with a limp – gotta be the money -”_

The cop's words were cut off by a fist that slammed into the back of his head and sent him crashing to the floor. Jim slammed a second punch into the face of the other cop, then slammed him against a wall as his eyes blazed.

“My Oswald is _not_ a tramp!” he said darkly, “Next man who talks about him like that is leaving here in body bag!”

Then he let go of him, gave his aching knuckles a shake as he walked away. Even as he left the building and got into his car, his rage was still simmering. _How dare they be so judgemental, because he was living with Oz and Ed... Oz was the birth father of his children!_

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to force himself to calm the fuck down before he went home. He couldn't tell Oswald about this, he would been so upset and furious to think anyone would talk like that behind his back. Jim drove the long way home, taking his time, waiting for his anger to subside. Then he went home to another exhausting night of helping the family, knowing tonight, he would be doing it with an aching hand. It had been many years since he had hit anyone _that_ hard, but he would do it every day if he had to, anything to defend Oswald.

 _And soon the baby would be born_. Another small baby in the house, making more demands on his time, and this time, it would be one of his own kids...

Life should have felt like something wonderful right now, but instead, it felt like a constant exhausting uphill climb with no end and he hoped when Little Oz was born that didn't get much worse, he didn't want to get to the point where he couldn't cope with the family, but he didn't want to give up his job either... Both situations felt unimaginable, but it felt like something was about to give somewhere, he was close to his limit right now and couldn't take much more of holding everything in his life together. He knew he was reaching breaking point...

 


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello :D  
> I'm glad this fic is being enjoyed so much :-)  
> And now a small warning:  
> Be aware this chapter contains rather graphic scenes of childbirth.

Chapter 11

 

It was a bright summer morning in June.

Hope was at school. Jim had taken her there and then gone on to work. Ed was out in the garden with Eddie. He had forgotten about the dishes and the laundry, that now had to wait. Oswald was up late that morning, but he had got dressed and then slowly made his way down the stairs without calling for Ed, because he had looked out of the bedroom window and seen Ed pushing their son on the swing. He was thankful to have his cane as he hobbled into the front room. Chris was on the sofa in a t shirt and shorts, with a resentful look on his face as he rested, because he had to – Oswald had reminded him many times not to overdo anything because his leg and his hip would give him pain, but Chris, who was a few days away from his nineteenth birthday, was a young man who hated the fact that he had to slow down. And now he was paying the price for it, yet again...

Tea was waiting for him on the table next to his favourite chair. Oswald smiled. Ed had remembered to do that for him before going outside. As he sat down, he looked over at his son.

“It's not difficult, Chris. You can walk short distances, you can drive your car, you can get around – you just have to take it easy the rest of the time.”

“I'm almost nineteen,” Chris replied as sadness reflected in his gaze, “I just want to be active. I want to live as if it's not there.”

“You mean your disability?”

Chris cringed at the mention of the word.

“It's just a limp.”

Oswald looked at him intently.

“Son, it's more than a limp. It's spinal damage. I get pain because I had broken bones many years ago. This is different. You had damage to your spinal cord. It's never going to go away. You need to learn to adjust to that. If you don't look after it, the problem will get worse.”

Just then Ed ran in with Lauren and set her down on the floor.

“Look what she can do!” he said excitedly. He got on his knees and clapped his hands, laughing as she laughed too.

“Come on Lauren, up, up!” he said, and Lauren crawled, then stood up unsteadily and took little steps, and just as she staggered, he caught her.

“She took her first steps!”Ed announced, “Just now, in the garden!”

Oswald was smiling as he told Lauren how clever she was. Then he heard his son's tearful voice.

“ _And I missed it because I'm laid up on the sofa!”_

Ed and Oswald exchanged a glance.

“I'll take her outside again, I need to watch Eddie,” he said, then Ed picked up Lauren and carried her back into the garden.

“Don't upset yourself Chris,” Oswald told him, “She will have plenty more achievements and you will see them. What's important right now, is that you rest.”

He fell silent for a moment as he thought about his plans.

“ _I have a date on my birthday.”_

Oswald looked at him in surprise.

“That's good news! Who is she?”

“Just a lady I know,” Chris replied, “She's beautiful. I've been wooing her for a while. We talk a lot online too. She doesn't know about my limp, or that it sometimes puts me on my back for a couple of days.”

“You should tell her,” Oswald replied, “It's best to be open about these things.”

Chris said nothing in reply. Moments later he grabbed his phone and sent a message:

_Hey Barbara, it's your secret admirer. I hope you can still meet me as planned. I just thought I'd mention I have a disability. I have a limp and I walk with a cane._

He sent the message and then waited, silently worrying. Oswald got up and went outside to join Ed. Chris was still waiting. There was still no reply. Then the phone buzzed and he picked it up and as he read the message, the reply was a surprise:

 _Oh my god,_ Barbara had said, _Is that YOU, Oswald? Please say it's you!_

“ _What?”_ Chris exclaimed as he read the message again and laughed. Then he recalled how attentive Barbara had been as she sat and spoke to his Dad... clearly, she had a thing for him...

He laughed again as he sent a reply:

_Not Oswald, no. But I don't think you will be disappointed!_

She replied at once:

_I'm looking forward to meeting you..._

Chris put his phone down, then thought about forcing himself to get up and deal with the pain just to be in the garden with Lauren. Then he remembered his Dad's advice, that without rest, he would be doing himself no favours. It was time to take that advice. As he rested, he thought about the injury that had caused him lasting damage and felt a surge of resentment. Then from the open window, he heard Lauren laugh and the sound went straight to his heart. His baby girl was worth it. Lauren was worth a lifetime of pain, just to know she had been born safely and she was here in the world. Now he was smiling again, and considering a couple of days rest, to be sure he was okay for his date – it wasn't long now until Barbara would finally meet him...

 

Oswald didn't stay long in the garden. He felt a flicker of pain and put his hand on his baby bump, sitting down again, cancelling all plans to get up as he took in a sharp breath. Ed looked over at him.

“Stay there,” he said to Eddie, who was on the swing, and he hurried over to his husband, who sat at the table on the patio, his hand on his baby bump as he breathed out slowly.

“Are you in labour?” he said quietly, trying to fight off a flicker of panic. He had been excited about the birth, but after seeing what Chris had gone through months before he had suddenly wondered how bad the pain would be for Oswald this time, there had been a lot of complications with that damaged implant... Oswald looked up at him and saw worry in his gaze and forced a smile.

“The unit dropped lower three days ago, Lee confirmed it at my last scan. It's in position and on time. No, I'm not in labour. It's just those pains that come and go a few days before the birth. I think Little Oz will be here before the end of the week...a few days to go yet.”

Ed smiled.

“I can't wait to meet him!”

“Or her,” Oswald reminded him. They had chosen this time to not know the baby's gender – they wanted a surprise.

“What are we going to call Little Oz if she's a girl?” he wondered.

“Little Oz!” Oswald replied and then he laughed and so did Ed.

“Shall we go inside for a while, just you and me?” Ed said softly.

Oswald looked across the garden, then glared at him.

“Your memory is terrible, Ed!”

“Why?” Ed said blankly.

“ _Father, push me!”_ yelled Eddie, and Ed realised his mistake.

“Oh god, sorry, Oz. How could I forget our son was home?”

“It's not your fault,” he reminded him, and then Ed went back over to the swing where their son was waiting to be pushed. As Oswald watched Ed and their little boy, he felt worried as he thought about the birth of this next child. He didn't want Ed left in charge of the kids or the house while he was recovering, Ed was too forgetful, and Chris had to be careful how much he did each day, and Hope was too young to run the house and Tabby had her own life and Nessa to take care of and... _He needed Jim_. He knew Jim had already booked some time off work so he could be around to help out once the baby was born. But then he would go back to work...Oswald suddenly worried how they would all cope. Then he pushed those fears aside. They had got through a lot in recent years and they were still getting by. One more baby wouldn't make _that_ much difference...

 

The day of Christian's birthday arrived. Oswald was happy to know it was the best birthday he had ever had with cards and gifts from all of his family. Bridgit called him and they spoke on video call for two hours, while he held Lauren and she waved to Grandma.

Later that evening, while the rest of the family was downstairs, Chris tapped on his Dad's door. As Oswald said _come in_ , he opened the door and looked in to see his Dad still in his suit, his jacket was off, his tie was off and he was resting on his side. He had been having a lie down for half the day...

“Are you okay?” he asked.

Oswald sat up, placing a hand against his baby bump as he breathed through a flicker of pain.

“I'm fine, I keep getting these little pains that come and go – I had them a few days ago and then they stopped. I'll soon know if I'm in labour. It's not happening yet.”

Chris went over to the dressing table.

“Can I borrow your cologne?”

“Of course you can.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

As Chris put on the cologne, he gathered his thoughts, then he turned back to his Dad.

“I need some advice.”

Oswald smiled.

“Is this about tonight? You must really like this girl. What is it, are you worried about telling her about that?” he asked, indicating to his cane.

“No, she knows,” Chris replied, I told her a few days ago. It didn't put her off.”

“I should hope not!” Oswald said, “If anyone turns you down because of your limp, don't bother with them!”

“I really want to impress her tonight,” Chris added, and he paused to glance back at the mirror to run a hand over his hair and check his appearance. He was in bleached, ripped jeans and a t shirt and his shoes were polished. He had put on a black suit jacket that Oswald recognised as one of his own from years back – he had swiped his jacket?

“I see you've borrowed one of my jackets,” he said, “Yes, you may have it, Chris!”

His son paused.

“You know how you manage to do everything with a limp and it doesn't stop you?”

Oswald nodded.

“Go on..”

“Well, I have big plans for tonight...”

He hesitated again.

“What is it you need to know?” Oswald asked.

Chris took a deep breath as his face flushed.

“ _How do I fuck standing up? I mean, how can I bang her really hard without falling over?”_

Oswald stared at him. These were his big plans, to _bang_ her?

“Are you sure you're ready to do this?” he asked.

Chris laughed and put his hand in his pocket and flashed a pack of condoms.

“I'm ready!”

“That's not what I meant...” he looked at Chris, who was waiting for the answer like his Dad was some great oracle of wisdom that knew all the secrets of how to live a full life with a limp. He gave a sigh.

“If you bring her to the edge of the bed, you can lean against it while you... _bang_ her. It should stop you losing your balance. But get your balance first before you... _begin_ ,” he said.

Chris smiled.

“Thanks, Dad. I'm leaving now, I might be late – or not home until the morning!”

“Yes, I know that,” Oswald replied, “You've said it enough times over the past couple of days! Don't worry about Lauren, she's fine. Hope and I are taking turns to watch her.”

Chris gave him a hug. Oswald noticed a sparkle in his son's eyes.

“You must really like this woman a lot. I take it she's older than you?”

“Much older!” he said proudly, then he leaned on his cane and hurried out, heading for the stairway as he pulled the keys to his Porsche from his pocket.

Another flicker of pain cut through his body as Oswald laid back sharply, taking in a quick breath as he felt more pains flickering... Then he recalled how Eddie's labour had started, that had been fast... _Was he in labour?_ Another pain cut through his body and this time, it felt more like a cramp, a cold, squeezing pain that ran down from his ribcage, deep into his body. _Yes, that was an early contraction..._

Just then Ed walked in as downstairs, the front door closed.

“Are you okay, Oz?” he asked, You look a bit flushed.”

Oswald breathed slowly as he cradled his baby bump. He heard the Porsche leave the driveway.

“Is Eddie off to bed?”

“Yes.”

Oswald breathed slowly again, controlling the discomfort well.

“And Hope is in her room?”

Ed thought about it.

“No she's in the garden.. no, wait, she came in from the garden...” he snapped his fingers as his memory kicked in, “She's downstairs watching TV!”

“Okay, I need you to call Tabby and tell her to get over here to watch the kids, we need to get to the hospital. I'm in labour.”

Ed's eyes widened.

“Are you feeling okay with it?”

Oswald felt a stronger cramp and breathed through it as he nodded.

“Yes, but we can't delay – the detachment issue I had early on was resolved but it doesn't change the damage to the implant, the fluids might not release properly. I need to be in a hospital to have this baby, Ed. I could have a fast labour like I did with our son.”

Ed felt slightly breathless as he reached for the phone.

“Okay, I'm calling Tabby. What about Jim?”

Oswald breathed through another cramp.

“He finishes work at nine. Call him after you've called Tabby, there's plenty of time, I haven't even discharged birthing fluid yet.”

The he tried to get up and changed his mind, breathing slowly instead, controlling the discomfort as the cramps became more regular.

“I'm calling Tabby now,” Ed said quickly, and his hand shook as he reached for his phone. Oswald was calm about this, but Ed was growing increasingly worried. The fact that Oswald couldn't have this baby at home in case of complications was enough to cause him much concern, and as he called Tabby and waited for her to answer, Oswald spotted the worried look on his face.

“Ed, it's going to be fine,” he said, then he focussed on his breathing as he tried not to think of Ed's concerns, right now all that mattered was keeping the pain under control, because it would get a lot worse before this was over...

 

The sun had set to an orange glow as Barbara Kean parked her car and got out. She walked away from the car and paused to look around as she stood there in the heat of the summer evening wearing a short white dress. She ran her fingers through her fair hair and frowned as she glanced about, seeing no sign of her mystery admirer. Then she pulled out her phone and sent him a message:

_You seriously want to meet me here, at some sleazy motel?_

A reply came back immediately:

_I'm waiting for you. Room 30._

She looked sharply to the door numbers, then turned her head in time to see a faded curtain twitch. Barbara smiled as she set her sights on the door. _Now she would find out who this guy was..._ She had no fear of meeting a stranger, after all she had handled in the past, this would either be a weirdo who she could tackle easily, or... maybe he wasn't. And that was why she quickened her pace as she headed for the motel room door.

She had planned to knock, but it was ajar.

“Hello?” she said, and she pushed the door open and went inside.

The curtains were closed, the lights were off. And then they snapped on, bulbs flickered in old glass wall lamps, showing up faded walls and basic furniture. And then as the lights burned brighter, he stepped out of the shadows. A handsome young man, wearing pale, ripped jeans. His shirt was off and his toned body looked good in the lamp light. He took a couple of steps closer, smiling as he locked his gaze with hers, oblivious to the limp that he had once feared would put her off him.

“Hello, Barbara, I do hope you're not disappointed,” Christian said as she looked at him in surprise. He stepped closer.

“You are simply beautiful,” he stated, and as he reached up and brushed a lock of blonde hair from her face, she was still staring at him... _Chris had been behind the flowers and the messages?_ He carried Oswald's same costly, masculine scent, too – he was wearing the same cologne. And his embrace was strong as he pulled her into his arms.

“I'm not disappointed,” Barbara whispered, and as she looked into his eyes, she recalled what she had once said to Tabby, that she would never have an age gap relationship... as she felt a magnetic pull towards him and wanted to swoon in his arms, she decided never to say _never_ to anything, ever again. Then he slid his hand into her hair, gripping it firmly as he pulled her towards him and covered her mouth with a passionate, hungry kiss.

 

Ed had called Tabby to come over and watch the kids. By the time she arrived, Hope had hugged Oswald and wished him luck and Nessa had done the same, as Eddie waved from the front door. Oswald was already in the car, and taking the wheel because the cramps were minor. It would definitely be a while before his labour advanced. Ed had left a message at the GCPD for Jim, who was out on duty.

“Are you sure you can drive?” Ed asked again.

Tabby looked in through the open window.

“I could drive you over there -”

“I can manage!” Oswald insisted, “I've barely started contractions!”

“Good luck,” Tabby added.

Oswald smiled. His face was slightly flushed and he was starting to lightly perspire, a sure sign that the first stage of labour was beginning.

“I'll be fine,” he assured her, “Take care of the kids, I'll call later.”

Then he started the car and they drove away as Ed looked at him nervously.

“If you get a sudden stabbing pain or you flood this car with birthing fluid, we are pulling over to the side of the road!” he said as tension crept into his voice.

“I'll be fine!” Oswald repeated, and they turned on to the highway, and he focussed on the road, all the while breathing slowly as he handled the flickering cramps with ease.

“We should let Chris know,” Ed said, taking his phone from his pocket again.

“Chris is on a date, call him later!”

“I'll leave him a message and tell him there's no need to rush home, there's plenty of time... And then I'll cal the GCPD again -”

“ _Ed, relax!”_ Oswald insisted, as discomfort registered on his face and he took another deep breath, “I've got hours to go yet, it's very early, it's barely started. And Jim will get the message soon! He's out working on a case right now!”

Ed said nothing in reply as he sent a message to Chris: _Your Dad is in labour. It's just started, probably hours to go. No need to rush your date, all is okay here!_ Once the message was sent, he put his phone away. They were heading into the city. The hospital wasn't far away. Oswald was coping fine with the drive. Ed started to feel a little less nervous.

 

As the message hit Christian's phone it buzzed, and the sound was drowned out by the rhythmic banging of the headboard against the wall, and his gasps and her cries as she lay there on her back, and he stood over the bed, thrusting into her hard. Their bodies moved together, as sweat ran down his chest and her flesh gleamed with perspiration. She cried out as she came and he slammed into her twice more, leaning hard against the bed as he came sharply, gasping as the orgasm hit. Then he separated from her. They were both still breathless as she shifted up the bed as he laid beside her and pulled her close.

“You,” he kissed her as he breathed hard, “Are amazing, Barbara! I'm crazy about you!”

She ran her fingers through his sweat soaked hair as she gave a deep sigh.

“Why did you bring me to such a cheap motel room?” she asked as amusement danced in her eyes.

“Because I'm a wealthy man and I don't want use money to impress you,” he replied, “I figured you'd either like me or you'd look at me and see my limp and change your mind...”

“It's a sexy limp.”

He laughed as he held her.

“No it's not!”

“You have a great body, Chris,” she said softly, “And I know why you have that limp. I know what happened when you gave birth to your daughter. You're a very brave guy,” She ran her hand over his chest and then traced the lettering over his heart that said _Lauren_.

“Could this be the start of something special?” he said softly as his heart skipped a hopeful beat.

She met his gaze and smiled.

“I hope so,” she whispered, and then she pulled him closer and they kissed again.

 

Oswald had reached the hospital with no problems and was able to walk from the car after briefly pausing to lean against it as he breathed through another contraction.

“Are you sure you can walk?” Ed had asked, and he had nodded, then felt thankful of Ed's arm around him as they entered the hospital.

Now they were up on the second floor, and as they entered a birthing suite that was comfortably furnished with a bed that didn't look out of place in a hotel room, Ed felt rather confused.

“This doesn't look like a delivery room.”

“It's a birthing suite,” Oswald replied, “It means I can have a natural birth if possible, like at home – or if I need any intervention, the staff are here to provide it.”

“I'll leave you to get undressed,” Lee said to him, “Then I'll come back and examine you and we'll see how far along you are.”

“Thank you, Lee,” Oswald replied, and then she left the room.

Ed took off his jacket and draped it over a nearby chair, then he turned to Oswald and placed his hands on his shoulders as his husband tensed, closing his eyes as a stronger wave of pain cut through his body.

“I'll help you get undressed,” he said.

“Thanks, Ed,” Oswald replied, now feeling glad of his help as the pain of the contraction lingered.

Ed helped him take off his jacket and then his shirt, and as Oswald unbuckled his belt, he gripped hard on Ed's shoulder.

“I'd better get these pants off before I ruin them,” he said, taking in a sharp breath, “I can feel a lot of pressure... I'm about to leak birthing fluid, I can feel it.”

 

Twenty minutes later, Oswald was on the bed, naked and perspiring beneath a sheet that covered his upper body. He grabbed at it and crushed it in his grip as he felt another wave of pain, and now movement was difficult as Lee placed absorbent padding underneath him and he had to shift position for a moment. His hair was damp with sweat and he was perspiring much heavier, his face was flushed and he felt hot as Ed took hold of his hand.

“I'll examine you now,” Lee said, but as clear fluid ran from his body and he gave a low whine as he pressed his face against the pillow, she patted his shoulder.

“It's okay, I'll wait for a moment,” she told him, “It doesn't look like a lot of fluid, Oswald. You may not dilate enough, the rest may come out during the delivery and it won't have time to work. You will probably need an assisted birth, but you were expecting that because of the issues with the implant. Do you need to ask me anything?”

Oswald was breathing easily now as he waited for the next contraction.

“I know what to expect,” he said and held Ed's hand a little tighter. Then he felt an ache throb deep as his baby bump dropped a fraction lower, and he placed a hand on it, breathing hard against the pillow. Lee examined him and then drew her hand away.

“You're going into the second stage already,” she said, “You don't need to push yet, the chemicals in the birthing unit are pushing the baby towards the implantation scar and that's open, so it won't be long. Maybe three hours or much less, it can happen fast or slow from here.”

Oswald shivered as another pain cut through him.

“I need gas and air,” he gasped, “Now!”

“I'll fetch it for you,” she replied, and as she walked away, Ed gave his hand a squeeze.

“It's okay,” he said softly, “I'll get you through this, Oswald. Not long until we meet Little Oz...”

Another pain cut through his body and Oswald tensed and gave a low moan as pain registered on his face.

“It's not fast like last time!” he gasped, “Oh, this is _too_ slow!”

Just then Jim hurried in. He had got the call and left work as soon as he could, and he took one look at Oswald, saw he was in pain and hurried over to the other side of his bed, grabbing his hand.

“It's okay, Oswald,” he said as he looked into his eyes, “We're both here for you, both here to meet Little Oz when he arrives, keep breathing deeply.”

Oswald closed his eyes and tried to breathe, then gave a cry of pain as another contraction hit hard. This birth was going to be tough, it was slow and the labour was taking its time.

 

An hour later, Oswald was still gripping Ed and Jim's hands as Ed stroked his hair and Jim bathed away his sweat as the pain increased and taking lungfuls of gas and air did little to ease it. Oswald yelled sharply as the pain throbbed lower, and he closed his eyes, thinking about the crash and all the reasons why he had kept that damaged implant. Now the baby was coming, the baby he had almost lost. It made the pain seem almost insignificant, even when he finally felt the urge to push and Lee told him she needed to give him an injection before making a cut to allow room for the forceps. He gave a sob as the needle went in, and as she took up scissors, Ed looked away. Jim leaned over him, pressing his cheek against his as he spoke softly to him.

“ _It's okay, Oswald,”_ he said, _“I'm here, Ed's here, we both love you, it's almost over...”_

He didn't feel the pain of the cut, but as the forceps were applied his body went rigid as he screamed, and then he pushed as Ed and Jim both supported him as Oswald struggled to stay on his side, yelling loudly again as blood and birthing fluid soaked the padding beneath him.

“Almost there, Oswald,” Lee told him, “Push again, really hard. You can do this.”

Oswald was shaking as he clung tightly to Ed and Jim's hands, and he pushed hard as he yelled out in pain, and as the baby was born, a loud first cry filled the air. As Lee drew the baby away to cut the cord, birthing fluid gushed out mixed with blood from the forceps delivery. _It was followed by a silvery skin, the implant – it was intact, but Lee would later say it was the most busted up birthing unit she had ever seen, scarred from the impact of the crash and the procedure to prevent the miscarriage. But it had done its job. Baby Oz was here_.

Oswald turned on his back, panting hard, exhausted and smiling as he heard his child cry for the first time. Jim gave a sob of joy and so did Ed and they both kissed Oswald and told him they loved him, and then as he held his child for the first time, Ed and Jim hugged each other.

“ _I swear,”_ Ed said as he wiped his eyes, _“Some day, I will find a doctor who will allow me to have an implant. After what Oswald's been through to get his three kids into this world, I want to share that pain, and that joy!”_

Lee was busy cleaning up Oswald, who was cradling his newborn. She heard what Ed had said to Jim, but turned her attention back to Oswald again.

“I'll give you some time with your baby, and then you will need quite a few stitches, we need to do this within the hour,” she reminded him.

Oswald was radiant with joy as he looked up from the baby in his arms and smiled at Lee.

“That's fine,” he said weakly, “I am completely numb down there - at last! Just let me hold my child for a while...”

Lee smiled too.

“I'll be back soon,” she said.

Jim and Ed sat at Oswald's bedside and Jim 's eyes filled with tears as he smiled.

“Little Oz is here at last!” he said, I'm so proud of you both!”

Oswald turned his head, giving Jim a soft kiss, then he looked at Ed as love shone in his gaze.

“Little Oz made it, Ed.”

A tear ran down Ed's face as he reached out.

“May I?”

Oswald handed him the baby, and Ed cradled the newborn as tears ran down his face and looked into eyes like Jim's, framed by long, dark eye lashes. The child's hair was the same shade as Oswald, and he affectionately touched the tip of the baby's little pointed Cobblepot nose.

“I love you so much, I'm going to cherish you,” Ed said, “You're such a tough little boy to survive inside that damaged unit...”

Jim and Oswald exchanged a glance, and then a smile as Jim spoke up.

“Ed,” he said, “Can _I_ hold my child now?” and he laughed softly as Ed handed the baby over and Jim cradled his newborn. It was then Oswald closed his hand over Ed's and laughed softly as amusement danced in his eyes.

“Ed,” he said, “Let Jim have time with his baby, you can have the next cuddle, okay?”

Ed couldn't stop smiling as he blinked away tears.

“He's such a brave, tough little boy,” Ed said again.

“Shall I tell him?” asked Jim.

“Allow me,” replied Oswald.

And they exchanged a glance and laughed. Ed looked at Oswald in confusion, as amusement sparkled in Oswald's eyes.

“Stop calling her a boy! Little Oz is a _girl_ , Ed!”

Jim smiled down at his daughter as he cradled her in a white blanket.

“Of course she is!” he said as he looked into her eyes, “A tough little girl. You fought so hard to be here, sweetie, growing inside that damaged implant. We're going to love you forever!”

They named her Ozara. It was Jim's idea. He said he had read it meant _treasured_. But as he held her, Oswald smiled at his daughter and said, “I think we all know you'll always be called Little Oz!”

Oswald gave her a first feed, then Jim and Ed took turns to hold her while Oswald was cleaned up and stitched. Thanks to the rest of the birthing fluid expelling too late, he was completely numb and didn't feel a thing as Lee repaired the birth injuries, and even fell asleep for the last twenty minutes of the process.

 

An hour after the birth, Oswald was in a comfortable room, recovering with his baby at his bedside. Jim and Ed stayed with him for several hours, and as he slept and rested, Jim reached over and took hold of Ed's hand.

“I love you both,” he said sincerely, “And I will always be here for Oswald and you and the kids. We're in this together for life.”

Ed nodded as he smiled.

“Yes, we are,” he agreed, and at that moment, he knew for sure they had made the right choice, the three of them were strong together - and on this night, had never been stronger than they were now.

 

In the motel room, Barbara was wrapped in a warm embrace with a man who she felt as if she had waited her whole life to meet. He was unlike anyone she had ever known before, intuitive to her needs and desires, keen to know all about her and urging her to share her hopes and dreams. His touch felt like returning to a home she had sought all her life in the arms of another and never found until now. She had never known a man like Chris Cobblepot... Then he had checked his phone and seen the message.

“Oh no, my Dad's in labour! I should go!”

He got out of bed and started to send a message back. Barbara sat up, looking at her lover as he stood naked by the closed curtains looking down at him phone. She wanted to remember every inch of his body, everything about him... now he had captivated her. And he had to leave, and it felt unfair, but she completely understood why.

“Is he okay?” she asked.

Chris had set his phone down as he started to get dressed.

“Uncle Ed said he went into labour a few hours ago and he said don't rush back but that was earlier... I need to know my Dad's okay. And I have to go home to my daughter. Tabby will be stuck with looking after all three kids and her own daughter until Ed and Jim get back. I'm sorry Barbara, I have to go home to Lauren.”

“That's fine, of course you do.”

The phone buzzed. He pulled up his jeans and stumbled on his weak leg, and slammed a hand on the table to stop himself from falling, and laughed off his embarrassment as Barbara smiled back at him, looking into his eyes, not thinking about the limp that he felt so self conscious about. Chris read the message and started to smile as he read it out:

“ _Your Dad gave birth to a baby girl, she's a healthy eight pounds two ounces, your baby sister is called Ozara! Dad is resting, he is fine now, he had a rough time with this one - needed forceps and a lot of stitches, but he's coping just fine. He's so happy our Little oz here, and so are we! Don't call him now, it's too late at night. He needs to recover. See you in the morning – Uncle Ed.”_

Barbara started to smile too.

“That's great news! He's had such a worrying time with that pregnancy, I'm glad it's over for him! And Little Oz... what a lovely name, Ozara... _Are you going to have any more kids, Chris?_ ”

He had just finished getting dressed and as he reached for his cane, he turned and looked at her.

“Me personally, giving birth again?”

“Yes, you..”

He stared at her. His expression had changed, like he was looking right through her, or maybe, he was off in thoughts far from here and this moment...

“Chris?” she said.

_His heart was pounding as he relived the memory of screaming and blood and pain and the complete belief that he was going to die. Then she said his name again and he took a sharp breath, blinked and focussed on Barbara. She was quite simply the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, and that was enough to stop the flashback..._

“No,” he said, sounding very sure, “I'm not the kind of guy who gets along with carrying or giving birth to a child. I did it because my girlfriend didn't have long to live. I will _never_ do it again!”

He took in a discreet, slow breath that stopped the anxiety attack still that felt as if it hovered nearby. _This wasn't the first time he had suffered flashbacks... For his Dad, giving birth had been so wonderful he had done it three times, despite the problems with Hope's birth. For Chris, his own experience of childbirth had been the worst nightmare, the worst experience of his life and he would always associate it with absolute_ _terror..._

“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you, it's just that you said it was easy.”

Chris limped over to Barbara and smiled as he looked down at her, meeting her gaze and feeling that magnetic pull once more. If wasn't for needing to get home to Lauren, he would have stayed the whole night.

“I may have exaggerated in order to impress you,” he admitted, “Drunk on your beauty, it _did_ inspire the liar in me to come out to play. _No_ , Barbara, I will _never_ give birth again. It was traumatic and it left me like _this_. Anyway, I should get going now, I've got to be there for my daughter, and in the morning, I'm off to visit Dad and my new sister. Call me, I'm looking forward to seeing you again.”

“I will,” she promised, then he leaned closer and they shared a kiss, and as he pulled away for a moment their gaze locked, and then he stepped away from the bed, turned for the door and limped out of the room. Barbara laid back in sheets that carried the scent of her lover and as she heard the Porsche start up outside, she smiled:

_Yes, she would definitely be seeing him again. She had never dreamed she would want to date a man so much younger until now - but until now, she had not known Chris Cobblepot..._

 

Chris got home before sunrise and quietly unlocked the door and went inside. The house was in silence. He went upstairs to see the door to the master bedroom wide open, Jim and Ed were sleeping on top of the covers still in their clothing, Jim was on his side snoring softly, pushed to the edge of the bed because Ed was sprawled out like a starfish as he slept deeply. Ozara's crib – Eddie's old bed when he was tiny – was by the window, and as he went into the room, he smiled to see his daughter was sleeping in it.

“Good morning!” he said as he reached for his sleeping baby.

“ _Dada!”_ she said joyfully as she opened her eyes and smiled, giving a squeal of delight as he lifted her out and held her.

“I see Jim and Ed crashed out together, they must be very tired,” he said softly to his daughter, “Guess what clever Grandpa Oswald did last night, he had a little baby! A little girl, a new friend for you! Her name is Ozara!”

Just then Ed gave a tired groan and lifted his head from the pillow.

“Chris, go talk to your kid downstairs. I've been up half the night with Oswald...let me sleep!”

“Okay, sorry,” Chris said softly, then he felt an ache in his leg and a pain in his lower back that translated into a strange, numbing, burning sensation.

“I'd better leave you here while I get your feed ready,” he said, “Daddy's leg is hurting today.” Then he put her back in the crib and limped out of the room, leaning harder on his cane as he headed for the stairway.

Chris got halfway down the stairs and suddenly, his weak leg went completely numb as if it had disappeared. It happened as he was about to take the next stair, and he grasped at the rail and tried to balance with his cane, but a second of trying to right it did no use as he lost his balance, slipped and fell half a flight, sliding and tumbling, landing at the bottom of the stairs in the downstairs hallway on his back.

He was shaking with the shock of it as he tried to get up, and he struggled as his leg felt like a dead weight, then he took two seconds to breathe and focus, realising he had fallen half a flight, and now his leg felt completely paralysed. Hope was up first, hurrying down the stairs with her hair messy and still blinking sleep from her eyes.

“Chris?” she said in alarm, reaching her brother, who was on his back and struggling to sit up. His cane was out of his reach and as he looked up at her, panic filled his eyes.

“ _Sis, I can't get up!”_ he said, _“I can't feel my leg!”_

Hope thought quickly.

“Don't move, you might make it worse!” she told him, then she yelled for Jim and her Uncle Ed, as Chris lay there with his heart racing in panic. This was the last thing he needed, for his spine to worsen... He tried to move his leg again, but felt nothing. In that moment, he wondered if his life was over. How could he look after Lauren if he was stuck in a wheelchair?

“It's okay, Jim and Ed are coming,” Hope said.

“ _My leg went numb and I fell, I can't move it!”_ he gave a sob.

Jim reached him first, took one look at Chris and a thought hit him that made him feel instantly selfish:

If Christian's condition had just got worse, how the hell could he cope with more problems in this family? It was hard enough now, but with Chris and Lauren to look after, and Oswald coming home with a new baby... _It would be too much._

Jim didn't want to voice that aloud, feeling sure he would never forgive himself if he walked away from Oswald and the promises he made, but right now, it seemed this family had more problems than it could handle, certainly more than he could handle - if he wanted to hold on to his career and the long hours it demanded. His career had been his life. It still was, but Oswald and the kids were also his life...To choose between the two was unthinkable...

 

 


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

 

Oswald brought Ozara home three days after the birth, and needed to go straight to bed to rest, while he took painkillers to ease the pain of the bruising and stitches. But Little Oz brought him so much joy the discomfort was a small price to pay. The whole family loved Little Oz, they had all held her, and she was a happy baby and full of smiles for everyone.

By now Chris was back from the hospital after his fall on the stairs. The news had not been good – he had not rested enough and his recovering spine had become inflamed again, with treatment the injury had improved but his long term outlook was worse now. He would recover and be able to walk short distances again – but it would be very limited. Now he would have to spend most of his time in a wheelchair. Even when he recovered from the worst of it, he would still need the chair for bad days - which would be frequent.

The news had hit him hard. He had messaged Barbara and told her what had happened, then added he understood if she didn't want to see him again.

_What she did in response was unexpected._

She had turned up at the house. Ed had answered the door, looking at her blankly, wondering why she was here.

“I need to see Chris,” she said, and he had let her in, still confused.

Barbara walked into the front room. Oswald was resting on the sofa, cradling his newborn daughter.

“Barbara!” he said with a smile, “It's lovely to see you, look, Little Oz is here at last!”

Barbara blinked away tears.

“That's great, Oswald. But I'm here to see Chris...”

“He's outside in the garden,” Oswald replied as he looked at her in confusion... Was Barbara seeing Chris? He didn't know how to feel about that, recalling how ruthless she was back in the old days...

“Thanks, I know the way,” Barbara replied, and then she had stepped outside, walking over to Chris, who was in a wheelchair and looking out across the garden. He turned his head, saw her standing there and looked away again.

“I really don't expect you to stay around,” he said as he blinked away tears, “I don't blame you for walking away. You don't want me now.”

Ed had gone to the doorway, and if he had not seen it with his own eyes, he would not have believed it:

Barbara got down on her knees and took hold of his hands, looking up into his eyes.

“Chris,” she said, “The chair doesn't matter! Stop thinking like that. When I told you I loved you, I meant it.”

Chris had reached for her, pulling her closer as he kissed her, and then they stayed in a tight embrace.

Ed had gone back inside and told Oswald what had happened.

“Barbara?” Oswald exclaimed as he sat there feeding Little Oz.

Ed shrugged.

“Barbara,” he confirmed, sharing Oswald's unease about Chris and his choice of partner. She was not someone to mess around with. They both knew she had a ruthless streak and her reputation from the old days lingered on. But Chris had chosen her, and she had said she loved him...

 

The days passed by.

Oswald's birth injuries healed quickly, he was soon over the worst of the pain and able to become more active, but Jim and Ed insisted on helping out as much as they could. Every night Oswald slept in Ed's arms. Jim stayed in his own room, because he never shared their bedroom – that was the deal, and he was happy to stick to that. There wouldn't be any threesomes for a while. Oswald certainly wasn't ready to get intimate again yet, it would be a few weeks until he was properly healed and right now, all Ed and Jim wanted to do was take care of him and keep him comfortable. Oswald appreciated the attention. He told them both he felt truly loved.

“That's because you are loved,” Jim reminded him, and Ed had smiled, feeling no sting of jealousy. The three of them worked so well together to keep this house running, and most of all, to look after Oswald and the children. It was all worthwhile.

 

And then, something happened that Jim had been dreading, and when it did happen, it was worse than he had ever imagined. It was a Monday morning. He was off work, because he was taking time out to help care for Little Oz. The past few days had been tiring, but he had kept going. Oswald had been up early that morning, and he was in the front room, resting on the sofa, feeding Little Oz. Ed was upstairs resting because the baby crying in the night had broken his sleep and lack sleep was disastrous for Ed, it made his memory worse and gave him headaches. Now Jim was sitting with Oswald, just spending time with him and the baby. Then he heard Hope yelling from the kitchen.

“I'll go, you stay here,” Jim said.

He got up and went into the hallway. Eddie was making _swirly swirly_ patterns on the wall.

“Stop that!” he said, and Eddie screamed and threw himself on the floor as Jim took his crayon. Then Hope yelled again that the kitchen was flooded, and he hurried out to see the kitchen sink had flooded and water had spilled on to the floor. Ed walked into the room, now he was up and dressed and his hair was still damp from the shower.

“Oh, did I not turn it off?” he asked.

Jim stared at him.

“I thought it was Eddie!”

“No, I washed some dishes when I came down for breakfast before I went back to grab some more sleep...Did I not turn it off?” he asked again.

Hope glared at him as she stepped out of the water on the floor.

“I almost slipped, Ed!”

“It's not his fault,” Jim reminded her.

“I need some help up here!” Chris called out.

Jim gave a heavy sigh.

“Could you clean that mess up?”

Hope glared at Ed.

“You flooded it! Clean the floor, Ed!”

Jim went out of the room and hurried up the stairs. Chris called out again. He went into his room to see him in his chair with Lauren in his arms, unable to reach for her dropped bottle of juice. He picked it up and handed it back to Chris.

“Thanks,” he said, and Jim left the room.

Now Oswald was calling him.

“ _What the fuck is wrong now?”_ Jim said under his breath, feeling like this place was turning into a mad house of chaos.

Oswald was waiting at the bottom of the stairs. Eddie was looking tearful after he had been told off for drawing on the walls again. As Oswald stood there with Ozara in his arms, he glared at Jim.

“The walls, again!” he fumed, “I thought he stopped doing that!”

“I'll clean it off, you go and rest,” Jim said to him.

“ _It's your mess!”_ Hope yelled from the kitchen.

“What happened?” Oswald demanded as he heard his daughter shout.

“Ed left the water running.... I'll clean the floor too, don't worry about it.”

Jim went back to the kitchen.

“ _I'll do it!”_ he snapped, then as he grabbed a mop, finally, Ed left the room and Hope went outside and there was peace again. He was planning to clean up the wall next, but Eddie ran out into the garden and back in with muddy shoes and left foot prints all over the floor. Then Chris called to him again because his daughter had dropped her juice a second time and he couldn't pick it up. Jim went back upstairs and retrieved the bottle, then as he left the room, his phone rang. There had been a big case come up and it was linked to a case he had worked on a few months back. Did he want to come in for a few hours to help out?

“Yes, I do!” he said thankfully, and he hurried back downstairs and grabbed his jacket.

“Where are you going, Jim?” Oswald said as he stood in the hallway still cradling Ozara.

Jim looked at Oswald, giving a weary sigh. _Breaking point had been reached..._

“I need to go into work for a while. Maybe for a few days... Maybe I'll take some time out... from here. I need to get away, I'm sorry. I'm not sure when I'm coming back.”

He kissed his cheek and left the house, not looking back to see the hurt expression on Oswald's face. Jim drove away from the house feeling as if he had just escaped all of the pressure – and he knew he couldn't go back to it if he wanted to give one hundred percent to his job. He loved Oswald, but he had a house full of kids and problems and Ed couldn't cope like he used to... _It felt like too much._

 

Once Jim was back in his office, he closed the door and sat at his desk, thinking about all the years he had spent dedicating his life to something he believed in :

_Justice and law and order in a city that was so corrupt it felt like a never ending battle. He still believed in that fight for justice..._

Tears filled his eyes.  
There was something _else_ he believed in too, and he had never felt so torn as he made his decision. It took ten minutes of sitting there at his desk, missing the family that had driven him out with their chaos, as his heart ached for Oswald. J _ust ten minutes. For a choice he had once thought was impossible as his heart ached - and he instantly knew where he needed to be._ There was no choice to make any more, and he found it was easier to do than he had ever imagined, because he was following his heart now...

He wrote a letter of resignation, took a copy of it and folded it in his pocket, left the original on his Captain's desk and walked out of the GCPD, got in his car and drove home. _Home to Oswald and the kids, where he knew he belonged._

 

When Jim got home Eddie was in the hallway, reaching for a crayon. The _swirly swirly_ was still on the wall. He walked past him, went into the kitchen and mopped up the floor. Then he went back to the hallway and handed Eddie some paper and told him to go and draw outside in the garden, and he cleaned the crayon off the walls. Then he listened, it was quiet upstairs. He went up to check anyway, and found Chris asleep, out of his chair and resting on his bed while Lauren lay comfortable on the carpet, her toys scattered around her while she lay on her back, having an afternoon nap. He closed the door quietly and went back downstairs.

Oswald was in the front room, still wrapped in a silk robe as he left his tea to go cold as he wiped his eyes. Ed was walking the room cradling Ozara and as Jim walked in, Ed glared at him.

“ _How DARE you walk out on Oswald, on this family!”_ he fumed.

Jim looked him in the eye, speaking the truth as he made a promise:

“ _I won't do that again.”_

He handed the copy of his letter to Oswald.

“I just resigned. I can't be here for this family and do my job. I made the best choice. I know where I need to be.”

“ _You resigned?”_ Oswald exclaimed as he sat there looking up at him in disbelief.

Jim nodded.

“I want you to read my letter.”

Oswald began to silently read. He saw the first few lines, wording that formerly handing in his notice, effective immediately.

Then Oswald read the rest of it aloud:

“ _The reason for my resignation is simple: I love the birth father of my two children. And if loving Oswald means taking on everything that comes with his whole family, I'm happy to do that. I'll help his eldest son when his baby drops her juice and he can't pick it up because he's in a wheelchair. When Eddie decides to turn the walls into canvas for his scribble art, I'll clean it off the wall and deal with the tantrums._

 _As for my own two kids, my eldest daughter is in her mid teens. I have her moods to handle, and that's just fine. And my youngest daughter arrived recently, born to my very brave and amazing partner Oswald. You're probably aware I'm in a three way relationship. It's a committed, loving relationship and I don't want to let either of those guys down. They both need me. Ed has a damaged memory because of the car crash. When his memory lets him down, when he gets confused, I'll be there to help him out....”_ Oswald paused as he blinked away tears and his voice trembled as he continued:

“ _As for Oswald, he's the one thing me and Ed have in common:_

_We both fell in love with a courageous and exceptional man who has gone through hell to bring three kids into the world, one of Ed's and two of mine._

_This is the ultimate reason I am handing in my resignation: I'm needed at home, and that's where I want to be, with my Oswald and our children. I don't consider giving up my job to be a sacrifice. I don't resent the decision either. It's a choice made out of love, and my love for Oz and the kids is unconditional.”_

Oswald put the letter down and got up, as tears formed in his eyes he limped over to Jim and put his arms around him.

“ _Thank you so much!”_ he said as his voice trembled, _“We love you too, Jim!”_

As Jim hugged him, he looked over his shoulder at Ed, whose temper had melted away. He stood there holding Ozara in his arms as he smiled warmly. All was forgiven.

 

**Three months later:**

 

Chris was leaning hard on his cane as he limped into the front room, then sat down heavily. Every time he managed to walk short distances he had a look of victory in his eyes. Partial feeling had returned to his leg and while he had to spend most of his time in the chair, on good days he could use the cane. He had even started driving again, which was useful when he met Barbara. He always saw her away from the house, and always stayed for the night and came back the next morning. They seemed to be getting along well, but Ed and Oz were still unsure about the relationship, although they did not voice this aloud to Chris.

“The kids will be fine,” Chris said, “I have the TV on for Eddie, and the crayons are locked away.”

Eddie was on the rug and he looked back at Chris with an expression of annoyance as Chris laughed.

“You're _not_ having them!” he added, then he looked up at his Dad, who stood with Ed and Jim, “Lauren is on the mat playing with her toys. And I have Ozara in her Moses basket right next to me and her next feed is here beside me on the table. Don't worry about the kids, just go and make your dreams come true. Good luck, Uncle Ed.”

Ed exchanged a glance with Oswald and Jim, then smiled.

“Thank you Chris, I certainly will need luck!”

Then they left the room and walked up the hallway towards the front door. Ed paused in front of the mirror to check his appearance. Oswald stood behind him, looking immaculate in a dark suit as Jim stood the other side of him, looking casual in jeans and a jacket.

“Come along, Ed,” Oswald said, “We don't want to be late.”

They reached the front door and as Jim opened it, Ed took a deep breath, trying to chase away his tension.

“We can do this,” Jim reminded him with a smile, “Power of three.”

Oswald gave his hand a squeeze.

“We are a strong triad,” he reminded him, “Let's get in the car, Edward.”

And they left the house together.

 

Forty minutes later, the three of them were sitting in Dr Lee Thompkins office. Ed sat in the middle, Jim and Oswald sat either side of him. Lee looked across her desk at Oswald and his husband and Jim, who was now the third party in their relationship, and felt puzzled.

“I don't understand why you made an appointment to discuss having another implant,” she said, “Oswald, you can't have any more kids, you've carried three, a fourth would be too risky.”

Oswald smiled.

“It's not for me.”

She looked at Jim, who laughed.

“Lee, I'm a father. I'm happy to be a father. But I'm not ashamed to admit I don't have the kind of strength and courage it takes to be a birth daddy. I couldn't go through everything Oswald has been through. That's just not for me.”

She looked at Ed, who gave a tight, polite smile as he sat there nervously and then spoke up.

“We thought it might be worth a shot to come back a second time and ask you to reconsider your decision. _I still want to have an implant. I want to carry Oswald's child._ ”

Lee looked at him in silence. Then she recalled all the reasons she had turned him down, before recalling what he had said after Oswald had given birth to Ozara, about how he wanted to share his pain and his joy...

“Ed,” she began, “You have a psychiatric condition -”

“Okay, you said no,” he glanced to Oswald then Jim, “Let's go home -”

“ _Wait, I'm not done,”_ Lee said, and he looked back at her.

“It's a _no_ , Lee. I know it, just say it!”

Lee paused, then continued:

“You also have memory damage because of the car accident. And you have two young babies in the house already and a very lively three year old. In addition, Hope is in her mid teens and could be a handful if she became rebellious, and Chris often has considerable mobility problems, I know he copes well but that's still something to consider.”

“So, lots of reasons to turn me down this time, okay Lee, I understand,” Ed replied, forcing a smile.

Then Lee spoke again.

“ _Two years.”_

Ed looked at her. She looked back at him.

“Two years? I don't understand,” said Ed.

“Two years from now,” Lee replied, “If you've coped with your busy and demanding family and had no incidents of difficulty with your psychiatric problems, yes Ed, I _will_ allow you to have that implant.”

He drew in a sharp breath as tears filled his eyes. Oswald and Jim exchanged a glance and both smiled warmly.

“ _Really?”_ Ed blinked away tears, _“I can have a baby with Oz?”_

“As long as you have no problems between now and then,” Lee replied, “And I see no reason why you should have problems, because clearly you handle your condition well, you cope with the memory loss too, you've had a lot to deal with with over the past few months, and you've had no difficulty with it. Also, I don't doubt that your three way relationship will stay solid, I know you guys go a long way back and your love and commitment is so clear to see, so there will be plenty of support at home. There's no reason why you can't carry Oswald's baby, Ed.”

“ _Thank you so much!”_ he said as tears of joy shone in his eyes.

Before they left, Lee got hugs from Jim and Oswald, and a very grateful and tearful hug from Ed, who couldn't stop thanking her. Lee was still smiling as she closed the door to her office. She didn't doubt she had made the right decision - especially after hearing those words Ed had spoken from his heart moments after Ozara was born. Ed deserved to have that baby he wanted. Lee felt sure this had to be one of the best parts of her job, and she had certainly achieved that today. She loved making dreams come true, and today that had definitely happened for Edward Nygma...

 

As the car drove away from the hospital and headed home, Jim was at the wheel. Ed was in the back seat with Oswald, who was holding his hand tightly.

“I thought she was going to turn me down!”

One glance at Ed told Oswald his husband was still not over the good news, it was still sinking in: _He really was going to have that baby he wanted!_

“Two years isn't long to wait,” he reminded him, “And it's better to wait because Lauren and Little Oz are so young. Two years is a perfect gap.”

Ed placed his hand below his ribcage smiling as he tried to imagine how it would feel to have Oswald's child growing inside him. _This was going to be wonderful..._

They arrived home and Jim parked the car. As they got out, Ed still had a big smile on his face.

“I can't wait to tell the family the good news! Hope will be so thrilled for me, and so will Chris! And Eddie's going to be so excited!”

Oswald chuckled as he glanced at Jim.

“I told you he would be like this if he got a yes!”

Jim laughed.

“Yeah, he won't calm down for the next two years!” he said, then glanced at Ed, “I've never seen you look so thrilled!”

“Let's go and tell the family together,” Oswald added, then the three of them walked towards the house, as Jim put his arm around Oswald, who took hold of Ed's hand. Then they went inside to tell the family the good news, doing this how they did everything best these days – together.

 

End

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This concludes Part 2 of Unconditional Love. I hope it has been enjoyed :-)  
> Thank you so much for all your lovely comments and the kudos - it means a lot, fan fiction is my favourite place to write and to know my stories are enjoyed by others is great!  
> * PART 3 of Unconditional Love * is now COMPLETE   
> And so is Part Four - enjoy the read :D  
> Love Davina X


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